


The World is a Small Place

by sagewhisker1111



Category: Death Note
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Family, Friendship/Love, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-20
Updated: 2017-05-10
Packaged: 2018-09-25 21:46:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 55,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9846995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sagewhisker1111/pseuds/sagewhisker1111
Summary: L Lawliet, Light Yagami, and Beyond Birthday, adopted brothers in a foster home that go to To-oh. Mello Kheel, Matt Jeevas, and Near River, sudden transfers from an orphanage in England to the Yagami household in Japan. With romance, emotions, misdirections and new friendships, how will everyone deal with this change in their lives? After all, new beginnings bring new revelations.





	1. If you can't avoid it, just go with it

Disclaimer: I do not own Deathnote, if I did you would see more of Near :p

Mello's Pov:

"All flight attendants, please secure yourselves a seat, we will be taking off shortly" The Pilot's voice sounded from the intercom just as Matt and I stepped into the plane.

"Damn it Matt, now we're late" I grumbled as I made my way to the nearest available seat, Matt following in tow. I could still hear him clacking the keys on his Gameboy as I sat down, shoving my bag in the rack above us. I paused, turning to look over at Matt who was still standing just beside the seat. Most certainly not to my surprise, he was still absorbed in his game. "Matt" I spoke irritably, trying to get his attention back towards me. His only response was a tiny 'Hm' sound as he continued mashing buttons.

I let out a huff and leaned upwards in my seat, yanking the gameboy out of his previously occupied hands. He gave me a confused look as I proceeded to pack the small device into my bag, and eventually let a frown cross his face. "What was that for?" He asked, a slight pout on his lips as his hands fell to his sides.

I gave him the most sarcastic look I could muster up, "Sit" I told him, pointing to the seat. He complied without a response, sitting down in the place closest to me and buckling himself in. I let out a sigh and opted to stare out the window until we took off. Blatantly ignoring Matt's hung head and twiddling of fingers, I didn't feel bad, he could learn to stop being such a child.

Only a few seconds ticked by before Matt spoke up again.

"I'm sorry Mels, I just..." He trailed off, causing me to turn my head to the side to look at him. The pity that I was holding back hit me now as I looked at the sullen redhead. I sighed, "It's okay Mattie, I don't know anybody who would feel fine with these circumstances.." I told him, but offered no other forms of comfort.

A few more seconds ticked my in my mind before Matt leaned back in his seat, looking at the ceiling of the plane. "I just don't get it, why Japan of all places? There are surely other foster homes in England-"

"They just don't want us there Matt! No one wants a bunch of homosexual teenagers in their house! They all think we are all out to cause trouble, thats just the way it is!" I snapped, tears refusing the fall from my eyes, even though I felt like crying, I felt like pouring all of my tears out right then and there. But I couldn't, life is unfair, life is tough, there are worse things that could happen, worse reasons to cry. Though I felt bad for snapping at him as I caught sight of his expression, I hurt him..again.. "I'm..just forget it, we will get through this, who knows, maybe Japan will be okay after all." I told him, my version of and apology if anything.

He slowly nodded in response, shifting around in his seat and rubbing at his eyes as discreetly as he could, trying to pass it off as him ruffling his hair, but I still caught it. With a frown I turned towards the window again, not wanting to see him upset even more. Maybe if I didn't look at him I could convince myself I didn't need to comfort him..

"Even if Japan is okay I'm still gonna miss England ya know" he mumbled eventually, receiving a nod from me. "I know," I said quietly, and we fell into silence once more. Though I was faintly aware of Matt's twitching fingers that wanted to be occupied with something, to bad they didn't allow electronic devices on planes for most of the ride.

I looked up from the window a few minutes later when some voices sounded from behind us.

"Excuse my little boy? We need you to take a seat"

"I realize that, I was simply grabbing some water"

Me and Matt both looked over the top of our seat in unison to see what was going on.

"Um, alright, what's your seat number? I can help you find your place" The Stewardess, a young blond woman, spoke to a small child while offering him her hand. The child, I found to be quite an odd looking boy, curly white hair, baggy white pajamas and white socks, small and fragile in stature, and clearly albino. He only stared at her firmly for a few seconds, causing her to look uncertain under his gaze, before responding.

"I don't need help, I know very well where I am supposed to sit" He explained, but his voice confused me, he sounded more like a young teenager than a child.

The stewardess looked a little confused, "Um, okay..?"

The boy nodded, and began to walk around her, leaving the Stewardess slightly dumbfounded, and almost embarrassed. I was about the turn back around in my seat until I noticed something.

"Hey Matt? Is he coming over here?" I questioned, glancing at my friend briefly.

He nodded in agreement, "I think so, it's not like we got private seats or anything though" He shrugged.

I frowned, I didn't want to have to sit with someone else for a full twelve hours, let alone that kid. He kind of creeped me out a little bit, something was off about him, I just couldn't put my finger on it. Nontheless the boy eventually made his way up to our seat, only stopping once he was at the border of our chairs. Clearly, he found that I was the more authoritative one between Matt and I, because he immediately ignored Matt and placed his gaze on me.

"If you wouldn't mind, I have been assigned this seat" He simply stated, causing Matt to shrug and me to scowl.

"Whatever" I told him, not intending to have any sort of conversation with him as I turned back in my seat to look out the window, closing my eyes in an attempt to ignore everything around me.

"Here, I can put your back up in the rack" I heard Matt offer, much to my disdain, though I supposed I couldn't stop him from being friendly to people. That didn't mean I liked it though.

"That would be much appreciated" I heard the boy agree.

I only gave Matt a quick glance as he leaned over me to place the boys bag above us, but I did catch the almost amused look on his face. Still scowling I leaned my head on the plane window, closing my eyes again.

"My name's Matt, and this is Mello-" I caught him whisper something to the boy after he said that, though I didn't catch what it was, most likely something stupid, so I shrugged it off as the other boy responded.

"Nice to meet you Matt, Mello, my name is Near"

I found the name odd, like more of a nickname if anything, it probably was, but I just ignored it. kid could call himself whatever he wanted. I figured Matt just nodded in response, as, besides some shuffling they didn't say anything more.

Then, after another announcement from the intercom, the plane took off.

I looked over in mild surprise as I felt a weight suddenly fall on me, snoring. I sighed as I looked over at the mop of auburn hair that fell against my shoulder, I stared for a moment unsure of what to do, before I decided to just adjust him into a more comfortable position for us both, not that it would ever be comfortable, planes are just terrible. Eventually I managed to settle him down against my shoulder, in a position that would surely leave us both with aches and pains the next day, but would be fine for now. I was about to rest my head against the window again when I caught sight of the albino boy across from Matt, staring at me.

"What?" I snapped in hushed voice, not wanting to wake Matt up.

"I was simply thinking" He responded almost immediately, bringing his gaze away from me as he spoke.

"About what?" I asked him, a scowl on my face.

"Nothing that you would be interested in, I assure you." He told me, raising his hand to twirl a lock of white hair. He seemed almost nervous.

"Yea, your right" I sneered, turning my head back to look out the window.

Only a few minutes passed before Near spoke up again, much to my chagrin. I probably wouldn't even see this boy after today, I didn't see what he wanted to get out of speaking with me.

"May I ask why Mello and Matt are going to Japan?" He questioned, causing me to look at him with a raised eyebrow.

"What's with the third person?" I asked him, blatantly ignoring his question, I didn't want to answer him.

"Just a habit, now will you answer my question?" He pried, much to my still growing annoyance at the boy.

"Why should I tell you?" I asked him, and edge to my voice.

"A simple yes or no would suffice" He simply suggested.

I huffed. "Why don't you tell me why you are going to Japan all alone, your pretty little you know" Probably ten years old at the most, I estimated.

"I believe that information is private" He noted casually, causing me to snort.

"My point exactly, now shut up" I told him, turning back towards the window in my preferred position.

"Mello is very impolite" Near noted and I snorted in response, but opted to ignore him, the kid was getting on my nerves more than I would have liked to admit, and I have hardly known him for even an hour yet.

I was almost dozing off myself when Matt woke up, lifting himself off of my shoulder slowly and rubbing at his eyes with a yawn.

I raised my head from the window, drawing my attention onto the sleepy redhead as he rubbed at his face. he ran his hands through his red locks, pulling out and straightening any knots that had formed during his nap. I found my gaze following his hands as they ran along the red locks, though I looked away the second I realized it, questioning myself with a sudden irritability at the action.

"Nice nap?" I asked him with a smirk, trying to push that certain thought out of my mind.

Matt only nodded as he straightened out his shirt, before settling down in his seat. I made a noise of acknowledgement and let my gaze drift around the front of the plane.

"Man I wish I could play my games or something, this is so boring" Matt eventually sighed.

"You want us to crash?" I drawled in response, only to earn another sigh as Matt leaned forwards in his seat.

"Mm no" He decided, "how long was I asleep?" He then questioned me.

I opened my mouth to respond, but Near got there before me. "Approximately eight hours and thirty minutes" He stated matter-of-factly, earning a discreet glare from me. Though Matt didn't notice and instead made to unbuckle himself from his seat before he stood up.

"I'm gonna get some water or something" He explained once he caught my questioning look and scooted past Near. I only nodded in response as he left, though once he was out of earshot Near spoke up again.

"Are Mello and Matt in an intimate relationship?"

The look I gave him this time was a mix between, incredulity, anger and annoyance as I was tempted to punch the little albino. It would have surely left a nice purple bruise on his pale white skin, bloody vampire. But I refrained from the action and instead, as calmly as I could at that moment said; "Not like it's any of your business sheep, but no, I'm not gay, and neither is Matt" I lied to him a little more bitterly then I had intended.

"I see" Was his simple response, and that made something spike in me, no matter how much I tried to repress it.

"Would you shut up?" I questioned him, tired of dealing with how much he seemed to anger me, and afraid that I really would snap if he persisted.

Interestingly enough he didn't respond, I had really thought that he would have made another smart assed remark like last time, but he didn't. Satisfied, I rested my head on the window and gazed down at the cloud covered scenery below us.

Only a few minutes passed before I heard Matt's distinct footsteps, though I didn't look up until he called to me.

"Hey Mello!" He piped childishly, causing me to turn to look at him, though I suppose I should have known better considering his tone of voice, as I received a handful of peanut shells in my face.

He laughed at the incredulously blank look I gave him, though I only began collecting the pieces that lay surrounding myself. Once he realized what I was doing he quickly held up his hands, a little to late though as several of the empty, and to my disdain soggy shells, hit his face with an unnecessary amount of force.

I wiped my hands off on the seat while glaring at him as he laughed. "Do I want to know why those were wet?" I questioned him, only to earn a wink and a grin as he sat down once again. "nope" was his response as he flicked a single shell at me.

I sighed, but I couldn't keep a small smile off of my face as I did so. There was this pleasantly warm feeling in my stomach, if only everything else in life was just as simple, I thought to myself.

L's Pov:

"Beyond! I told you not to tell him that!" Light shouted to the ravenette. Of course my only response was a cunning smirk as I watched their childish squabble. Though..this is an interesting development, who would have known mister perfect is okama? Well to tell the truth I suspected it, though I didn't have much to sustain my suspicions on.

Beyond chuckled at Light as he stared at the floor, red faced. "Relax Light, I'm sure Sherlock here already figured it out, right L?" He said in a teasing voice, cocking his head towards me, his raven black hair falling over his eyes.

"I deduced that there was a 33% chance" I stated, a smirk still on my lips.

Light near pouted, while Beyond stared at me incredulously before speaking. "Did you pull that percentage out of thin air?" He questioned, only to earn a light chuckle from Light. "What?" Beyond questioned, giving Light a indignant look.

Light shook his head, "Nothing, it's just that I don't think L has ever given and honest percentage" He told Beyond, who nodded in consideration, before leaning over the couch and grabbing another soda, he slowly shook the soda giving both Light and I a mischievous look, our eyes widened.

"Don't you dare" Light warned, seeming to have gotten over his prior embarrassment, and earning a cheeky grin from Beyond as he continued to shake the bottle.

"B I suggest you stop that, last time Soichiro saw you causing mischief he was very angry" I told him, though I wasn't to concerned about the stain that would be on the carpet. Actually, I found it slightly amusing when Soichiro got mad at Beyond, maybe I should change my ideals a little..

Beyond only grinned wider, and moved his thumb to pop off the top off of the soda bottle.

Light moved to try and stop Beyond from ruining the carpet, reaching over to grab the bottle with his hands. But Beyond pulled away, causing Light to lean forwards more in an effort to stop his friend from destroying the carpet with pink soda. "Give it to me B" He said irritably. I cringed a little, imagining what would happen if Light were to lean over just a little bit more. Then the phone rang, Causing Beyond to let Light take the bottle, and Light to lean back, looking in the direction of the kitchen with a distasteful look on his face. I simply sat off to the side a small smile. It was nice to see Light opening up a little bit.

Eventually I spoke up "Is anybody going to pick up the phone?" I questioned them.

Light turned to glare at me "Why don't you?" He questioned sarcastically.

"Only Light ever gets phone calls..they're from Misa.." Beyond mentioned, earning a scowl from Light as he sat up, handing the bottle of soda to Beyond with a 'fine' on his way over to the kitchen.

I raised an eyebrow at Beyond. "Are you going to open that bottle B?" I asked him, gesturing to the bottle still in his hands.

Beyond chuckled in response, "You want me to" he stated.

"It would make Light-Kun very upset, the stain would never go away" I confirmed in a mock innocence that caused Beyond to chuckle as he set the bottle down.

"Well, any bets to as who has called Light this time?" He questioned as he shifted around on the floor to sit cross legged.

I leaned my head back, gazing at the ceiling in thought for a moment. Really, I already knew who it was, I just wanted Light to have to go get it. Though I may have been avoiding the subject a little, I wasn't to excited to get the confirmation. "Wait for it..." I mumbled, earning a confused look from Beyond. It didn't take long for Light to appear in the living room with the phone in his hand, slight confusion on his face as he handed me the device.

"It's Soichiro, he wants to talk to you" He said as I grabbed the phone and leaned back into my original position.

"I know" I told him, as I pressed the phone to my ear, "This is L" I told the receiver of the phone as I smirked at Light's annoyed expression, though my attention quickly went to the phone once Soichiro began to speak.

"Hello L, Watari just called me, he uh, apologizes for the inconvenience, but those boys from England that I had mentioned? They are going to be there in about four hours"

I frowned a little, "Why such short notice?" I asked him.

"Well that was my fault, I was out on a case, so Watari couldn't get a hold of me, otherwise we would have had a few more hours to prepare. But anyways, can you inform Light and Beyond? As well as set up the rooms for them?"

"Of course, we can take care of it. Did you call Sachiko?"

"I did, she should be home in half an hour to help, she is also picking up some things so be ready to help move in a few beds..."

"Alright, is that all?"

"Uh yea" He sounded tired.

"Alright, I will tell Light-Kun and B, goodbye"

"Goodbye" With that I clicked off the phone, sighing as I set the device onto the table. I made a point of ignoring Beyond and Light's inquiring looks as I sat there, until they grew impatient and questioned me themselves.

"What was that about?" Light asked eventually.

I picked up a bottle of soda, making sure it wasn't the one that Beyond shook and flicked the top off, I took a sip, purposely taking my time to answer the question.

"Three weeks ago we got a call from Watari-" I started, seeing Light's eyes widen as he surely began to piece it together. "-He asked us if we could be ready to take in three other boys in case it was needed. I don't know the details about why they had to come here, I just know they are from England. That call just now-" I pointed towards the phone "Was to tell us that they will be here in less than four hours" I mumbled through the rim of the bottle.

"What!?" Both Light and Beyond shouted at once, causing me to cringe at the sudden noise as I almost dropped my soda.

"There's no need to yell in unison now" I complained, giving the duo a patronizing look "But we do need to set up our rooms for them, Sachiko is coming in a few hours to bring extra beds, and Soichiro will be home shortly, so we need to get to work"

Beyond nor Light looked appeased at this new information, but they nodded anyways, knowing that they couldn't stop it.

Matt's Pov:

I gazed around the airport, people were everywhere, pushing and talking and yelling, family's reuniting with hugs and presents. It was much to busy for my liking and I felt dazed, too many bright lights, Mello had stolen my goggles and packed them away, saying that they 'weren't fit for a plane'. Of course now I just had a headache without my usual veil of orange shielding my eyes.

"So where are we being picked up?" I questioned Mello, who looked just as disoriented as I did as he stood beside me on the lot.

He shook his head "All I was told, was to wait in the parking lot, where a guy named Watari will find us" He informed me.

"Alright, parking lot then?" I suggested, earning a nod from him as he let me lead the way through the crowd. eventually we made our way through the building, and then outside to a parking lot, still brightly lit, but quiet compared to the landing dock. I let out a sigh as we stepped out into the spacious area, Mello gazed around, scanning the parking lot for anybody who may have noticed us.

"I don't see how we are supposed to know who this person is," He huffed eventually, giving me a questioning look.

I nodded "I don't know either" I told him, eliciting a frustrated sigh from the blond.

"Let's just wait?" I offered, shoving my hands in my pockets and leaning against the wall behind us, Mello didn't respond but followed suit, setting our bag on the ground as he did so.

"You know, this sucks, Japan sucks, being orphans sucks, and moving sucks" He grumbled, a scowl on his face.

"I know" I simply responded, though it was enough for him, neither of us liked this situation in the slightest, so we both knew pretty well what the other was feeling right now.

We sat in silence for a few minutes, until I heard the click of a door opening and closing. It was then that I saw a blur of white out of the corner of my eye, and turned my head around to find Near by the doorway, eyes weary and calm at the same time as he held his bag and looked around the parking lot. I felt a little bad for the kid, being so young and small on a plane trip this far, and alone nontheless, I didn't see why any parents would do that to a kid, then again, my experience with parents is stunted at best.

"Hey Near!" I called after a second of consideration, catching his attention as he began to walk over to us.

"Why'd you do that?" I heard Mello mumble from beside me as he caught onto the scene, but I didn't respond.

"Are Mello and Matt waiting for their ride as well?" He questioned once he was closer to us, Mello only huffed and turned his attention elsewhere, I nodded.

"Yea, not sure what we are supposed to be doing right now, we were told to just wait in the parking lot" I told him, earning an understanding nod.

"I see, that is what I was told as well" He noted, and after a second of silence set his bag onto the pavement before sitting on it. "I will wait with Mello and Matt if you do not mind" He told us. I shrugged, a sheepish smile on my face while Mello just didn't respond.

We stayed there in silence for awhile, though with each passing minute I could tell Mello was getting frustrated. So was I to be honest, though I had a longer attention span than him.

"Boys, I apologize for the wait" An elderly voice spoke up from a few feet away, causing us all to look up. I immediately recognized the face, though I doubted Mello did. Gray hair, formal suit, polished shoes, kind gray eyes, and a genuine smile that I could never forget.

"Wammy?" I questioned, surprising myself that I remembered his name as I looked at the old gentleman, the last time I had seen him I was probably five years old.

He chuckled, "Yes Matt, I'm surprised that you recognize me, call me Watari though" He told me, holding out his hand, I smiled and accepted the gesture, though when he turned to Mello the blond sighed and gave a halfhearted handshake. The thing that really surprised me was when he turned to Near and greeted him.

"Hello Near, I see you found Matt and Mello" He spoke kindly, offering the boy his hand, Near, very slowly nodded and reached out a pinkie finger. Watari caught on quickly and offered his own. Mello and I both stared on with confused expressions for a moment, but it was Mello who spoke up once the exchange finished.

"You know that kid?" He asked, looking from Near to Watari.

Watari nodded, "Near is in the same program as you two, I thought you would have realized it by now, Near as well as you two were assigned to the Yagami's household" He explained, I nodded, still slightly confused and was about to open my mouth to speak, but once again Mello beat me to the question.

"How is he in the same program? He's like ten or something" He said , his voice on a higher and disbelieving note as he sent the two a scowl, clearly unhappy with the prospect of living with the boy.

Watari chuckled, "No, No Near is actually sixteen, not much younger than you two"

"What?" Mello questioned, his eyes locked onto Near as he did so, before he looked back up at Watari "How? He's so small"

I chuckled at that, earning a pointed glare from Mello as I did, but I was otherwise ignored.

Watari only shook his head, a small sigh escaping his lips, though it wasn't a frustrated one. "Alright boys, its getting late, we should get going now." He paused, turning to Near "Would you like me to carry your bag?" he offered, but Near only shook his head.

"I'm fine" The albino said as he stood up, lifting his bag over his shoulder as he did.

"Alright, if your sure, follow me" He told us and began to walk towards the car spaces, Mello and I following right behind, and Near just a little bit behind us. With one glance over at Mello I could tell he didn't like the idea of living with the boy, though I didn't know why he disliked him so much, but I supposed Mello kind of dislikes everybody in a way.

Wow! I spent hours on this..But I think I like it :) Do you? I have so many idea's for this story and I'm so excited about it, I have improved greatly since Hi stranger and this story is quite the step up from that, so please leave a review on your way out, it would mean the world to me :)

Have an awesome day! -Blue


	2. If you can't bear with it, hit it

Disclaimer: I do not own Deathnote, if I did, there would be at least a single frame with Beyond in it.

Matt's Pov:

I stared at the building as we exited the Black Sedan, it was just an average suburban home in Japan. Masonry stone walls, a large window facing the road, a cherry wood door, stone sidewalk, a picket fence surrounding a fresh green lawn, and some flowers lining the border of the house itself. It was just an average house, and I shouldn't have had a problem with it. But the thing was that, this was our new home, in any other situation I wouldn't have had a problem, but this just wasn't England. To be more specific, it just wasn't Wammy's House, it wasn't stone walls, with murals and stained glass windows, it wasn't a of set ceder double doors, it had no cedar floors, it had no classrooms, no lounge, no mess hall, no backyard with Mello's and I's treehouse. This place wasn't home, I wished it was, but it wasn't, at least I still had Mello though, it could have been much worse than this, like if we were separated..

I looked over at the scowling blond from beside me, who I was sure was critiquing the home just as much as I was, despite his outward appearance.

"Alright boys, I will leave you from here, if there are any problems don't hesitate to call okay?" Watari spoke up from his place by the drivers seat door, and I nodded in response, giving the older man a sheepish smile, while Mello only huffed, beginning to make his way to the house with a; "Let's get this over with" Under his breath.

I followed the leather clad blond immediately, making sure that Near was still following behind us as we made out way over to the door, only glancing back at the fancy car briefly as Watari drove away. Mello stopped at the door, ringing the bell, and waited for a moment. I heard the padding of feet down stairs, before the lock clicked and the door slid open, revealing an older man in his late forties. His mustache slightly grayed, but formally trimmed, his hair streaked with gray and brown, and clad in a casual brown suit. He looked tired at best, but his appearance didn't go without a kind smile, the man almost reminded me of Watari, but a little more stern if anything.

"Boy's, come in" He spoke, stepping out of the entryway and giving us apt room to move through the door, Mello first, then me, then Near traveling slowly and almost cautiously behind me.

"My name is Soichiro Yagami, but you can call me Mr. Yagami, it's nice to meet you" He greeted genuinely, offering me his hand.

I took it compliantly, though I didn't much feel in the mood for greetings. "I'm Matt, it's nice to meet you too" I told him, offering another sheepish smile.

He nodded, before turning to Mello with his hand extended, Mello only gave him a glare, causing Mr. Yagami to frown slightly. Though he didn't say anything, probably expecting at least a little bit of rebellious behavior from our group as he dropped his hand to his side.

"This is them?" A female voice spoke up from the doorway to what was probably the kitchen, and causing me to turn my head. The woman, which I assumed to be Mr Yagami's wife, wore a white apron over a blue sweater and conservative skirt, of course she too had a kind smile on her face as she stepped into the room, her short brown hair tied back into a bun with an elastic.

"Yes, this is Matt, Mello, and Near. Boys, this is my wife Sachiko, Mrs Yagami too you" He told us sternly, but still friendlily as he introduced us.

Mrs Yagami chuckled, "Its nice to finally meet you boys"

"Nice to meet you too" I responded, seeming as Mello nor Near felt like being social, in fact Near was almost hiding behind me, I didn't blame him at all as I shifted nervously in my place beside Mello. Mr Yagami, seeming to realize our discomfort at standing around, spoke up again.

"Alright, well dinner is almost ready, if you would like to put on some slippers, you can put your bags beside the stairs and join us in the kitchen" He stated, "The others will be down soon, they are just finishing up with your rooms. I heard about your friendship with Mello, Matt, so you two will be staying in the same room, while Near, you will be staying with Beyond, who you will meet soon" He informed us. Earning a grateful look from me, Glad that I wouldn't have to share a room with someone I didn't know. though I wasn't aware that we were sharing with anybody else at all, and it was a small surprise.

With a final nod Mr. and Mrs. Yagami headed towards the direction of the kitchen, leaving us to our own devices for the moment. Me and Mello stayed in silence for a few seconds, letting everything so far settle in a little bit. before I spoke up. "Well, I haven't eaten in the last twelve hours, so we might as well get moving" I mumbled matter of factly, leaning down to unlace my combat boots.

Mello and Near followed suit, but I couldn't help but notice how tense the blond's shoulders were as he untied his own boots. I knew he would be edgy, so this wasn't a surprise, I just hoped he wouldn't do anything regrettable.

After Near decided that he didn't want to wear slippers in place of his socks, and me and Mello both slid our now bare feet into the white slippers, we set our bags by the stairs. Though just as we did so, the sound of footsteps and voices sounded from the top floor, causing us to pause. Not more than two seconds later, a raven haired teenager came down from the stairs, pausing when he noticed us and smiling in what seemed to be recognition.

"Hello" He drawled out in a cheerful voice, hopping down the rest of the steps and offering Mello a hand, "You must be the new kids" He spoke in a mocking tone "I'm Beyond"

This time Mello resigned and took the teens hand, "Mello" he greeted tersely.

The ravenette leaned forwards as his gaze drifted over to me and Near as we stood just a step behind Mello. "You must be Matt then, and Near?"

"Yea" I nodded, eyeing his odd appearance. The boy looked our age, a few inches taller maybe, but it was hard to tell with his apparent slouch, he was decked out in a black sweater and baggy jeans, both garments looking to be about two sizes too big for him, making his apparently small frame appear even smaller. His eyes; a dark gray that reminded me of Near's eyes, seemed to have a tint of red in them, and it appeared he was wearing makeup. Foundation, giving his skin a pallor hue, and eyeliner ever so faintly applied underneath his eyes, giving the effect of slight bags underneath his eyes, that or he just didn't get much sleep. It was most likely the former.

A quick look over towards Mello told me he didn't like this kid; again not like he ever likes anybody, but even I wasn't so sure about how comfortable I was around him either. I felt bad for Near, recalling that Mr. Yagami had said that the pale boy was going to be rooming with 'Beyond'.

"Nice to meet you" He said, before turning his head towards the stairway, "Hey Light, L, get down here would ya?" he shouted, causing me to raise an eyebrow. What was with the names of these guys? I mean, me and Mello have nicknames, and sure they are kind of odd, well Mello's anyways. But L and Light? What kind of names are those?

A muffled response came from the upper floor, before I heard a door slam and two other boys appeared at the top of the stairs. The first one appeared to be Beyonds twin, though the other reminded me more of what would be considered the epitome of perfection. From his perfectly combed caramel brown hair, to the ironed khakis and white dress shirt he wore.

"Hello" They said in unison as they made their way down the stairs. "I'm Light, and this is L" He pointed to the slouched figure beside him as he stopped in front of us. "It's nice to meet you"

"Nice to meet you too, You can call me Matt, and this is Mello and Near" I nodded to each of the boys beside me.

"Of course" He smiled, though it seemed more than a little forced. I noticed L give him a sideways look, though it was so brief I'm not sure I even saw it.

"well, welcome home" L spoke up, pressing his thumb to his lip in an odd gesture. "Why don't we go to the kitchen, I believe dinner is ready" He suggested.

"Sure" I mumbled in agreement, looking over at Mello who just shrugged. He definitely wasn't all that happy.

"Alright" The ravenette said, making his way around us in what seemed to be his signature slouch. Beyond followed right behind him, a slight skip in his step and, I noticed his slouch was less prominent than L's. Actually every feature of Beyond's seemed to be a less prominent one of L's, weird.

We followed their lead, coming into the kitchen where Mr. and Ms. Yagami were just finishing setting the table. When we all entered the room they both looked up at us.

"Nice to see everyone is here" Mr. Yagami said in a humoring tone, glancing at Beyond patronizingly, only to earn a grin. "Take a seat" He said as he did so himself. The sound of chairs scraping the floor sounded as we all complied and took a seat, Mello sitting on the left of me, and Near on the right, Light, L and Beyond across from us and Mr. and Mrs. Yagami at each ends of the table.

"I hope you boys are alright with fish, rice and vegetables. I tried my best to make a simple meal for you, but the diet will still be an adjustment" Mrs. Yagami said as we settled down in our seats.

"We will be fine, I haven't eaten in twelve hours so food is food" I joked as I took a bite of rice. It seemed I was the only one who was going to converse with the family though, as Mello was in a bad mood and Near didn't like speaking in general it seemed.

My reassurance earned a smile from Ms. Yagami, though Mello's voice interrupted anything else that may have been said as he pointed a fork at Beyond and L. "Why are you two sitting like that?" He questioned in something close to a patronizing drawl. I looked over at the two ravenettes at his voice, and sure enough both were more crouched than seated on their chairs, both knees drawn up to their chests and toes just breaking the rim of the chairs.

L looked up from his questionable meal of cake, a blank expression on his face as he responded, but I did see his lip twitch in what could have been a withheld smile "I have to sit this way, if I sat any other way my deduction abilities would drop by over forty percent" He stated as if he was talking about the weather. "Unlike me though, Beyond just likes to copy everything I do" He said, though there did seem to be a lilt to his voice now, unlike before.

Mello only gave him an incredulous look. While I was looking back and forth between the two, eventually I spoke up. "So you two really aren't twins?" I asked to confirm my earlier suspicions.

Light, and Beyond chuckled at that, while Mr. and Ms. Yagami just looked amused. L's expression was unreadable, but there was a hint of mirth there. "No, we aren't even related at all" He told me with a small smile.

"Huh" Was all I said in response, earning a chuckle from Mello, and eliciting a smile from me despite my confusion at these boys, I loved hearing Mello laugh as he rarely did it at all.

"Well" Mr. Yagami spoke up, bringing everyones attention to him, "I don't know if you're aware, but tomorrow you will be going to school at 7 am, Light, L and Beyond will be going with you" he told us, turning the conversation around.

"That sucks" Was my only response to this new information, along with a slight pout. I didn't like school at wammy's, and even Mello didn't seem excited at the prospect of classes after a long plane ride like today.

Mello's Pov:

I rolled over in the bed again, letting out a huff. I couldn't get comfortable at all, it was too hot, too cold, and from what I could tell Matt was still asleep from across the room in his own bed. But I honestly didn't know for sure, after knowing him for so many years I realized that he was an expert at pretending to sleep. Something I suspected came from his childhood, but we never talked about how we got to Wammy's house, so I could never be sure.

I didn't have a good day, so it was reasonable that I couldn't sleep, not to mention jet lag. But still, it was too much for me to handle in one day, no matter how much I would deny it and hide it. I wasn't as strong as I let on, and I was stressed out. But nontheless I eventually spoke up, hoping that Matt was awake. I didn't know how he would be able to help with my insomnia, but then again I didn't really care.

"Matt, you awake?" I whispered, earning a 'Hm?' sound after a second. "I can't sleep" I stated to the lump on the other bed.

He rolled over, opening his eyes in the process to look at me in the dim lighting. "Me neither" He told me softly, "We should try though" He stated, earning a scowl from me.

"I can't" I told him, earning a snort.

"Typical, can you read a book or something if you won't at least try?" He suggested, letting his eyes close.

"No" I told him stubbornly, and cringed as I heard my voice crack a little. He surely noticed I was upset. I didn't even know why I had asked if he was awake, he couldn't help me fall asleep. I just needed to do what Matt does and wait for sleep to come.

He was silent for a second, then; "Want me come in bed with you?" He suggested, turning my face a light shade of pink.

"No" I grumbled again, rolling over in my bed and pulling the blanket over myself. "We're not five anymore Mattie" I told him, and that was right, we were to old too share a bed anymore.

I heard his bed creak, signaling to me that he was going back to trying to sleep, but then I heard the floorboards creak as he walked over to my bed. "Matt?" I questioned as he climbed into my bed and lay next to me, but he didn't responded as he pulled the blankets over us and buried his face in behind my neck. It felt awkward, and I tensed my body in reaction. Though I didn't say anything and let him lie there. Instead I just ignored his cool breath on my neck, and the warmth of his body beside mine. Eventually I managed to fall asleep, better than before, but I still felt uncomfortable.

L's Pov:

I walked back into the bedroom, towel draped over my dark locks as I closed the door behind myself. Light looked up at my entrance from his place by his desk, where he was organizing his books.

"Good morning Light-Kun" I drawled as I went over to my dresser, leaning down to pick out a shirt for the day.

"Morning" he spoke dismissively as he proceeded to shuffle his books around behind me. I looked up at him, noticing the low tilt to his voice as I pulled a white shirt over my head, dropping the towel in the process.

"Whats wrong?" I questioned, standing up and walking over to the brunette.

"Nothing" He mumbled as he leaned back in his chair to look at me, his hair falling against gravity as he gave me one of his signature smiles. One of his fake ones. I frowned.

"It's not nothing, we both know its not" I told him, "Is it to do with the boys from England?" I asked, though I was fairly certain that that wasn't the case.

"No, it's not, just forget it okay L?" He asked me, his eyes pleading. My frown deepened, not used to seeing Light this distraught about something. I had always known him to hide things, it wasn't new, but I had never known him to look as pleading as he did now.

"Alright, I'm going to go wake up Matt-san and Mello-san, it appears they are still asleep" I told him as I turned away. I would leave it for now, but that didn't mean I wouldn't figure out what was up.

"Yea I noticed, hopefully they don't need more than 20 minutes to get ready though" He chuckled as I made my way out the door, I smiled in response as I exited the room and closed the door behind myself.

Light and I's room was at the way end of the hallway, with the biggest window of all the bedrooms. Then there was Beyond's and Near's, and finally Mello's and Matt's closest to the stairs. I had been a bit concerned about how well Beyond would get along with Near. When I came here four years ago I came with Beyond, so I would know better than anybody how much of an annoyance Beyond could be as a roommate. But when I saw the two at breakfast this morning they seemed all right, so it was a relief. This whole thing was certainly an adjustment for everybody, even me.

I made my way to the last room in the hallway and opened the door, knowing that the two were still quite asleep. I wasn't exactly to surprised when I saw the duo snuggled on the same bed. Maybe I should have been, but from what I could tell, the two had been friends for a long time. Longer than Light and I, and with such a big movement in their lives it was beyond reasonable.

I closed the door behind myself and walked into their room until I was beside their bed, I leaned down slightly. "Matt, Mello, you need two wake up" I told them, shaking the half naked redhead. "Matt" I decided to focus on the redhead. He squirmed slightly in response, but didn't wake up. They probably hadn't gotten much sleep last night. "Wake up"

"Huh?" The redheads eyes fluttered open sleepily for a second, before he turned his head to look at me with squinted eyes. "Wha?"

"School starts in twenty minutes, you two slept in" I told him, watching as he blinked in confusion a few more times as he pieced together everything from the last few days.

"Kay" He rubbed at his eyes for a moment, Before turning around in his bed to face Mello, he shook the boy lightly. "Mel's wake up" he murmured, trying to wake up the blond.

Seeing that the two would probably be down soon enough, I exited the room without another word.

Light's Pov:

I opened the door for everybody once we got to the front gates, watching as the group passed me. Matt and Mello looking overwhelmed and tired, the pale boy; Near, looking indifferent but slightly nervous and L and Beyond looking how they usually do, L calm and collected as ever while Beyond had a purposeful look on his face. I frowned, not sure if I wanted to know why the ravenette looked so interested in school today, it couldn't be just because of the newest family members.

"Wow, this place is big" Matt commented in awe as he walked through the doors, Mello only gave a disinterested nod, clearly not caring about the size.

I nodded in response, glancing around the busy hallways of the school, no doubt Misa would be coming barreling over here soon. It would be nice if I could manage to avoid her until my classes started..

"Light!" I frowned at L as I recognized the voice of the cheery blond, before turning my head to the girl with a smile. But not missing L's amused smirk and the curious looks of Mello and Matt. "I missed you so much!" She chirped as she threw herself at me, I moved my arms to catch her and hold her to my chest, giving out a forced chuckle in the process.

"Misa I saw you yesterday, you couldn't miss me" I told her, forcing my voice to stay in an amused tone, but my irritation at the cheery girl leaked through slightly. Luckily she didn't seem to notice.

"I know...but Teru and Takada aren't good company at all" She pointed out, landing a peck on my cheek.

"They aren't that bad" I told her dismissively as I turned towards the group beside me, inwardly annoyed that she was holding onto me like her lifeline. "Alright, I can show you to the Principals Office if you would like" I told the three boys, who nodded in response, Matt and Mello still eyeing Misa uncertainly.

"Who are you?" Misa then asked, finally noticing the three new kids and detaching herself from me to walk over to them.

"I'm Matt" The redhead offered, along with an uncomfortable and awkward wave.

"Matt, Mello and Near came from England, they are in the same foster system as us" L pitched in, seeing Misa's confused expression.

"Oh, Well nice to meet you, I'm Misa!" She chirped, before her gaze drifted to Near and she leaned down in front of the uncomfortable looking boy "You're so cute, I bet you could wear girls clothing" She giggled, causing me to cringe, Near just looked uncomfortable, but responded anyways.

"I do not see the point, my current clothing is fine" He pointed out, a frown on his face.

Misa just giggled, ruffling his hair as she stood up, causing the boy to go ridged at the touch. I cut in before she said anything else. "Well, lets get a move on" I paused, holding out my bag to Misa, "Misa could you bring my bag to our first class for me?" I asked her sweetly, earning a pleasant smile from the girl.

"Of course Light, I'll see you soon!" She chirped as she took my bag and headed off in the direction of the classes. I waited until she was finally out of sight, I would gave let out a frustrated sigh if I was alone, but instead I just gestured for the boys to follow me and began to walk in the direction of the Principals Office with a "This way"

Once we got to the pine wood doorway, I stopped and knocked on the door. "You should be fine from here" I told them with a smile, seconds before the door opened and an older man with greying hair appeared in the doorway.

"Ah, you're here, come in" He simply said before going back inside he office. Reluctantly Near entered the room, followed by a grumpy looking Mello, and Matt was last, trailing behind the blond.

"Thanks for showing us here" He said with a small grin, before he closed the door behind himself.

"Well come on Light, Misa awaits" L spoke as he started walking in the direction of our classes, I scowled at the raven haired boy, but followed anyways. Leaving Beyond behind to go wherever he would like to until his classes started.

"This is going to be an exciting day" L remarked as I came up beside him.

"Yea, it will be, hopefully Mello doesn't get into a fight before lunch-time though, he seems like the type" I joked.

"I agree" L nodded. "On another note, good tactic for getting rid of Misa-Chan"

I scowled at him, "Yea, if only I could get rid of her forever" I grumbled.

"Now, now Light, Just because she is annoying doesn't mean that she is a bad person" He pointed out, earning another scowl from me, but a softer one this time.

Near's Pov:

I stared at the blank paper in front of me, ignoring the bustling children around me, working on their own art projects. Wammy's never made me draw on paper, they always gave me other things to do besides drawing. Like turning the page into a puppet and then painting it, never had I been forced to use a pencil and draw something on paper before..I had no idea what to do.

I twirled a piece of hair in my fingers, contemplating the picture, I could imagine each line that I should draw, I had the whole thing memorized, it was just a barn. But I had never bothered with drawing like this before, always clay puppets that I had to paint at the most.

I didn't like this, and the other kids were already starting on there drafts.

"Hey you're Near right?" A girls voice spoke up from across the table, causing me to look up at the brunette that had taken a seat across from me at the beginning of the class.

"I am" I told her.

"I'm Linda, you look like your having some trouble there, have you ever done this before?" She asked me, her brown eyes sparkling as her lips formed a pleasant smile.

"Not like this" I told her, not understanding what she was getting at.

"Well would you like me to help you?" She offered, already getting ready to move her supplies to my side of the table.

It couldn't hurt. "It would be much appreciated, thank you"

"Anytime" she said, her smile widening as she began to move all of her things to my side, I probably should have, but I didn't help her. Not that she seemed to mind once she settled in beside me.

"Okay, so first we need to start with a 9H pencil, it's the thinest" She said, handing me a blue pencil, I took it. "Then we need to use a ruler to get five straight lines like in the picture" She then put a ruler on my page, holding it in the right position for the line. Uncertainly I took the pencil and drew the first line, she then moved the ruler to the next spot for a line, quickly learning, I followed her pattern and drew the line lightly on each spot that she placed the ruler, smiling slightly as we got into a rhythm and worked on each other's pictures, creating our drafts.

Matt's Pov:

I glanced around the lunch room, searching for Mello. We only had one class together, which was our first, so I had lost him for most of the day. I continued my visual search, hoping that he hadn't gotten himself into some kind of trouble. We both knew it was very likely with his track record at wammy's. Eventually I caught sight of the leather clad blond with a group of sporty looking boys, his eyes narrowed at one boy with black hair as the boy seemed to have made a comment that Mello didn't like. I could see the irritation swirling around in his expression even from over here. Concerned, I began to make my may through the crowds of teens over to my friend.

"you totally look like a girl though dude" The boy chuckled, clearly oblivious to Mello's urge to hit him as I came up to the small group.

"Hey, whats going on Mells?" I questioned them once I was no more then five feet away, even though I knew very well what was happening.

The boy who was teasing Mello turned to me then, recognition flaring in his eyes immediately. "Hey your that geek that Aki was flirting with" He commented, the malice barely hidden in his voice. I blinked at him, hardly recalling what he was talking about, there were so many people that had talked to me today, and I didn't recall anybody flirting with me.

"I don't know what you're talking about" I told him honestly.

"Oh don't be an idiot, I 'outta hit you, bastard" He sneered, causing me to flinch just slightly, he was bordering on going to far.

"Hey, you shut it, You hit Matt and I'll hit you" Mello then grit out, coming up in front of the boy.

"Yea right, you probably couldn't get a decent hit on me if you tried" He chuckled.

I tensed, knowing exactly what he implied with that, and how Mello was going to react.

"You wanna bet?" The blond sneered dangerously, already drawing back his fist. Only then did the other guy look a little worried, but he still had a taunting expression on his face. By then several people had gathered their attention towards us, and some even stopped close to us to watch, Beyond and L being two faces that I recognized as they gazed on with concerned expressions, even if Beyond's looked more amused than anything.

I didn't stop Mello as he lunged forwards and hit the guy square in the face, the sound of the boys nose breaking from the impact echoing faintly in the air as he fell to the ground in a wreathing mess. Blood streaming from his face, along with tears and pained sobs. Mello began to advance on him further, ready to pummel the boy to the ground, seeing this, the other boy shuffled back on the ground, his brown eyes wide with fear.

"Mello, thats enough" I told my friend, deciding that any more would be going to far just for some mean comments. He sent me a glare, though it relaxed when he saw my concerned expression and instead opted to kick the boy in the stomach. Rather hard, but it was better than what would have happened.

With an angry huff he stormed out of the Cafeteria, leaving the teen choking on his breath on the floor, all of the spectators, and me, behind in the process. I didn't bother going after him, knowing it wouldn't do any good.

"What happened?" The gruff voice that I recognized as Mr. Omori sounded from the group, before the middle aged man made his may into sight. Once he caught sight of the boy on the ground, he quickly made his way over to him, helping the boy sit up. "Who did this? and someone get the nurse" He demanded, pulling a rag out of his dress shirt a handing it to the boy for his nose.

"Why didn't you stop him before he did it?" L's voice sounded by my ear, startling me, and causing me to jump as I turned around to face him, meeting his inquiring gaze.

"Um" I sounded, not sure how to answer, in truth I had never bothered to stop his fights, I only ever made sure they never went to far. "I don't know" I told the teen awkwardly.

"Hm" he sounded thoughtfully for a moment. "well nontheless I think you should tell the principal what happened, do you know where Mello went?" He then questioned.

"He has probably gone home" I told him, going off of memory, at wammy's after a fight Mello always went back to his room and proceeded to trash it. He would probably do the same here, and as usual I would be left to clean it.

"I understand" L said knowingly, earning a slightly curious look from me. What exactly did he understand? "Well, anyways, if you don't tell the principal what happened someone else will, so I suggest you go do that" He nodded over to to man who was currently speaking with a Teacher.

"Alright, you can go now" Mr. Omori told me, tucking a file back into his drawer and giving me a smile. "Thank you for telling me what happened"

"You're welcome" I told him, getting out of my seat. The second I did though thought crossed my mind, causing me to pause. "Mr. Omori, Mello won't get expelled or anything will he?" I questioned, concern evident In my voice as I looked at the man.

He shook his head "I am aware of your situation, so he will only get 20 hours of school service"

"Alright" I responded, giving the man one last grateful smile as I exited the room.

"Mattie Boy!" Someone shouted from behind me the second I closed the office door, before two arms fell over my shoulders. I startled, turning around to see none other than Beyond, as his arms fell off of me.

"What?" I questioned in a higher tone than I would have liked, slowly letting myself relax, though my shoulders still tingled from the unexpected touch.

"Oh nothing" He said with a smile, shoving his hands in his pockets and coming up beside me. I glared at him, though it wasn't near as harsh of a glare as Mello could pull off. "I just wanted to congratulate you on todays events" He stated.

Is he being sarcastic? I can't tell.. "Oh?" I sounded defensively, though he didn't seem to notice.

"Yea, that was a pretty good punch Mello gave that guy" He told me as he continued walking down the hall.

"I guess" I shrugged, "What's it to you?" I then questioned him, catching up to walk beside the teen.

"Nothing really, it was just pretty bad-ass" He commented, shuffling around in his pockets for a moment. Eventually he pulled out a little container of jam and started to pull the tab off, this got a funny look from me. "So anyways-" He said around his jam coated finger that he had stuck in his mouth "-are you joining any clubs?"

I gave him a curious look "Clubs?" I asked, edging him to explain.

"Yea, I just got signed into the band club today, but there's the art club, the studies club, tennis club- That's where L and Light are right now, then there the computer club, garden club-"

"Computer club?" I cut him off immediately, earning look from the boy.

"Yea do you like computers?

"I do" I told him, but redirected the topic quickly, not wanting to talk about my preferences with the teen, "On another note though, L is in the tennis club?" I clarified, not being able to picture the scrawny teen playing any type of active sport.

"Yea, him and Light won the Middle school championships when they were younger, that was before L and I came here so L was in England still" He told me, earning another wondering look from me. How much did I not know about these guys?

"You're from England?"

"Hmhm, sorta, L is from Portsmouth, while I was born in LA and lived there until I was 7, then I was in England until thirteen, when I came here" He informed me dismissively, licking clean his complementary container of jam.

That interested me, in a completely useless way. I guess it was just nice to have something in familiar with this odd group. Though, I could easily imagine myself coming to like them, at least they were interesting.


	3. If you can't deny it, ignore it

Disclaimer: I do not own Deathnote, if I did you would have seen A in at least two panels.

Mello's Pov:

"Mello? Are you okay?" Matts voice sounded from across the room, causing me to look up at him from my place on my bed.

"I think so?" I responded, giving him an inquiring look, not sure what he quite meant. Sure I had things on my mind, but I'm sure everyone in the house did. Maybe mine were a little more exeptional though. More apparent.

He looked away, going back to his math textbook as he responded. "It's just you seem to have been really distant since you punched that guy, I know it was a big day for us of course, but is something bothering you?" He asked me, his eyes firmly on his textbook.

"'I'm fine" I told him, going back to my own english book. I saw him nod slightly out of the corner of my eye, probably wanting to pry, but he just left it.

"Are you sure Mels?" He spoke up a few minutes later, giving me a sideways look. I shrugged, sitting up in my bed.

"I'm fine" I repeated "just tired I suppose" I lied to him. I didn't want to tell him what was going through my head, I wasnt even sure it was right. Well, surely it was wrong, but still, if what I was feeling was just a phase, then it would just mess things up if he knew. It was probably just a phase, I shouldn't even think about it.

"Alright" He simply responded, running a hand through his hair as he turned back to his book once again. I watched for a moment as he twirled a strand of red in between his fingers, my eyes drifting around his body for a moment before I pulled my gaze away. Cringing at the slight warmth on my cheeks. Surely I wasnt attracted to my best friend? That was wrong, it was so wrong, I couldn't...

My frantic line of thought was interrupted by a loud knock on the door, causing my head to raise, but I didnt have time to ask who it was before the door burst open. Revealing a grinning ravenette as he stepped inside our room.

"What do you want?" I growled at the teen before he could even try speaking up, earning a slight frown from him as his mood dimmed.

"Nothing really, I was just wondering if you would like to go to a party with us" He stated, an eyebrow raised at me as I only glared at him. "Hm?" He sounded in mild confusion after I didn't respond for a few moments.

I snorted, "No, go by yourself" I didn't feel like going out, not in the slightest.

"Sorry but.." He began as he walked up to me and grabbed my arm, effectively pulling me off of the bed "When I asked, I meant you had too" He finished, a firm grip on my arm as I kept my own hold on my bed-frame.

"No, I don't feel like it" I deadpanned, trying uselessly to get my arm back. The guy was pretty strong despite his appearance.

"Who's gonna be there?" Matt spoke up from his bed, causing me to frown. Leave it to Matt to want to go, whatever, he can do whatever he wants.

"Naomi, L, Light, Misa, Teru, and quite a few others" He offered, still holding my arm firmly.

"So its your whole group" Matt concluded, and indeed it was, I don't even know how L or Beyond got into the popular group of kids at school, but then again it could have been because of Light. the guy was like a doll, perfect in every damn way. "Lets go Mells, you're done most of your work anyways" He eventually said, earning my best glare, of course it didn't faze him though.

After a straight minute of glaring between the two I sighed, giving in. Going out wouldn't be to bad, Its not like I was going to do anything else here besides study anyways, I just had to withhold from punching anybody. "Fine" I told the teen beside myself, getting my arm back as I stood up and rubbed it gingerly.

"Alright then, get dressed and meet us downstairs" He told us, giving a slight wave as he slid out of the room.

Huffing, I stood up and walked over to my closet, opening the doors to find my vest. I tore off my flannel long sleeve before easily slipping on the leather vest.

"Why'd you want to go?" I questioned Matt as I turned back, "Usually you want to stay in and play video games"

He shrugged "I thought you could use the fresh air, staying in isn't helping whatever is bothering you" He stated blandly as he stood up, "You ready?"

I scowled at him a little, but it was quite halfhearted "Yea, lets go"

L's Pov:

"Beyond, why the hell did we let you drive?" Mello grumbled as he hopped out of the car, sending the black haired teen a glare as he did so.

Matt chuckled from behind him as he followed suit, "I drive way worse than Beyond, Mells, you shouldn't be complaining"

"Yea, well I trust you" He told the redhead pointedly, earning a smile from the boy.

"Mells loves me" He teased, wrapping his arms around the blond's back.

Promptly Mello's face turned light pink, "You're an idiot" he grumbled as he shook of the other teens arms. Matt pouted, but let go.

"Don't worry, next time I will make sure that Light-kun drives" I told them, twisting a lollipop around in my fingers as I made my way to the lit up building across the parking lot.

Seeing that I was departing, Beyond quickly made his way up beside me, slinging an arm around my shoulders, much to my chagrin. "I'm not that bad of a driver am I?" He questioned, his voice full of mockery.

"It depends on how you define bad" I drawled, "You don't crash, but you don't follow the rules either, it depends on your opinion" I told him honestly as I shrugged off his arm.

"I see.." He trailed off thoughtfully as his arm fell back at his side.

I glanced back to the rest of out group behind us, Matt silently tagging along beside Mello as per usual, while the blond was talking about something with Light. I knew there was something going on between Mello and Matt, I could see it as clear as day. Especially living with them for ten days now, there was no doubt. Though I wondered what was going through their heads, neither of them had told the other anything from what I could tell.

Relationships could be so fickle, So it was understandable. There were things like; what if it would ruin our friendship, what will other people think, and the fact that it is not socially acceptable.

Which is why I'm not in one, and I don't want to be. Unless the other person can match me in intelligence, but I think only Light would be able to do that. It was an interesting thought, being with Light, but I doubted the idea was exactly correct. Not that I was against it, it was just out of my comfort zone. The chance that Light was interested, was also very low, then again Light was tough for even me to read.

I made my way up the stairs of the brick building, reaching the door and promptly opening it. Letting Beyond walk past me into the noisy building, before I went in myself, letting Light catch the door as I let go of it. Inside was crowded already, as expected. Every guy here was probably hoping to get with Misa, and every girl with Light. The thought made me want to cringe, Light would never like any of them, he already doesn't like Misa as it is.

"L, Light, your late" A familiar voice sounded from behind me, and I didn't have to turn around to know that it was Takada. I tilted my head to the side to look at the japanese girl, today dressed in a white dress shirt and gray skirt, different from her school uniform, but still familiar. I smiled at her.

"I apologize, Beyond decided last minute that we should bring Matt and Mello" I told her.

She nodded in response, "Well, I'm glad that you could come" She turned her attention to the younger duo beside Light. "you too, Matt, Mello"

"Of course" The blond told her, while Matt only smiled.

Matt's Pov:

"Mello, you're underage" L noted, staring blankly at the cup of beer.

"One more year and I will be of age in England" The leather clad blond countered, taking another sip from his cup defiantly. L frowned slightly, but only shook his head and turned away, walking back into the crowd with his signature slouch.

"I dont think L agrees with your logic" I told Mello from my place beside the table, where I was leaning on it, "Or he just has better things to do" I added.

Mello only shrugged, taking a sip from his cup again before setting it down on the table "I don't really care" he told me.

"Thought so" I drawled absentmindedly, letting my eyes drift around the crowded room without any real purpose.

"Hey, what are you two doing over here?" A familiar voice spoke from behind me, causing me to turn my head to see Naomi across the table. I had met the girl on the second day of school, and ever since she had been quite friendly. I liked her quite a lot.

"Just hanging around" I offered, giving her a light smile.

"ah I see, do you wanna come play some games with Takada and I?" She asked with a smile.

"Um sure" I turned to Mello "Do you want to?" I asked, not really wanting to go unless my friend did too.

He shrugged. "Might as well"

"Alright, come on then" She said as she picked up an extra cup of punch and signaled for us to follow her. Me and Mello both nodded, following a few feet behind her as we made our way through the hallways. I was quite amazed by the sheer size of this place when I first got here, I guess that girl, Takada, was from a wealthy family. It didn't surprise me really, the girl had a rich personality, if anything I pictured her in a house like this.

"Here we are" Naomi said as she opened up a door to what was apparently a study. There was a desk in the middle, a few couches, a coffee table, curtains over the window and a fish tank. All themed in modern grays and whites. I couldn't say I shared her style, her clothing was so proper and formal, even in casual company, it just wasn't my thing. There were four people inside, Takada, as mentioned before, Beyond, and two other boys that I didn't recognize, all settled around a monopoly board.

"I brought guests, I hope you don't mind" She told them inside once we stepped in, catching the attention of everyone.

"Not at all" Takada said, sending me and Mello a smile as she was handed a cup of punch. "Come sit down, we haven't gone far so we can restart the game" She offered, waving towards where Beyond was sitting. Me and Mello nodded, moving around the room to sit beside Beyond, across from the two other boys.

Takada set at rearranging the board, followed by the others shortly. In no more than a few seconds the entire board was reset and we were rolling to see who goes first.

"Okay, Mello, Beyond, Takahashi, Rai, Naomi me and then Matt goes last" Takada stated, handing Mello the dice. "Roll a good one" She told him.

"I will" My friend said with a rather cocky smirk as he rolled a twelve, landing right on Connecticut Avenue, for 120 dollars "I'll buy it" He stated, handing the money to Beyond who was running the bank.

"Good choice mate" The ravenette drawled, taking the paper bills and handing him the property.

It was almost surprising how long the game went on when there was so many people playing, it felt like it went on forever before it was my turn, and even then I only rolled a nine and lost my next turn. I growled when I picked up the card, but simply slipped it back under the pile after reading it, and handed the dice to Mello.

"bad luck" Naomi drawled, thoughtfully observing the board.

"Oh, shut it" I told her jokingly as I watched Mello roll again.

"It was bad luck" Mello agreed with a chuckle "But it doesn't matter because I'm winning" He stated, earning a a light elbow in the side, followed by my own chuckle.

I'm going to get some punch" I told the group as I stood up from the floor, earning a few distracted nods and 'okay's. I hissed at the stiffness in my legs from sitting on the floor for so long, and stretched as I made my way to the door.

The party had not cooled down at all during the hour we were playing Monopoly, I had realized once I go into the main room, and concerning the game, Mello was of course right, he was in the lead. But I was glad that he was in a better mood, I knew his competitive streak would cheer him up if anything.

I made my way to the party's table, finding a cup and pouring some punch into it, meanwhile eyeing the crowd in the room. Many teens that I barely recognized, as well as a few that were familiar from school milled about, talking, drinking and dancing. I didn't know where Light was, or L, I would have expected them to be hanging out with us, but I supposed that they had their own friends separate from adopted family.

I frowned at the thought, I was comfortable at wammy's house, but then they had to tear us away and place us in Japan without explanation. Mello had figured it was because no one in England wanted us, but I didn't believe that, it didn't make sense. Just because we were in a certain program. I took a sip of the punch, cringing at the sweet flavor, it wouldn't quench my thirst at all, but it was better then, say, alcohol.

"Hey"

I turned my head at the sound of the voice, to see a drunken Korean girl leaning against the table with a smile on her face. Clearly she was intoxicated, I had thought Japanese teens weren't so wild...As portrayed by playing Monopoly at a party like this.

"Hello" I responded, making to walk back to the room where the others currently were, I didn't want to deal with her. But before I could take even a few steps she grabbed my arm, the one holding the punch, and caused it to splash over my shirt. I yelped in surprise, pulling my arm back and giving the girl a incredulous look.

"What!?" I questioned, grabbing a napkin and wiping what I could off my shirt.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to" She pouted drunkenly as she backed up, holding up her hands apologetically.

"It's fine" I sighed "Be more careful next time tho-" Before I could continue the sentence her lips were crushed against mine, and her hands on my back holding me in a tight grip. I gasped into the sloppy kiss, before pointedly shoving her off of me. My eyes met her deep brown ones, though the sultrily pout that they held earned nothing from me. "No-" I stuttered uncertainly, before sighing and looking away from her "You're drunk, just go hang out with your friends or something" I felt bad as soon as the words exited my mouth, her face turning into one on the brim of tears.

"Um-Alright-I'm just gonna go drive home then" She told me, turning away with one hand running through her hair.

"What-" She couldn't drive like that, no way. "Hey!" I piped, grabbing her shoulder lightly, causing her to turn around with a questioning look on her face. "I'll drive you, there's no way your going to drive home like this" I told her with a frown, it didn't matter if she was going to make a move on me, or that I didn't have a license in Japan, I couldn't let her drive home and possibly crash. I could just picture seeing it in the news the next day...

She nodded faintly, "Okay"

I sighed in relief "Just stay here for a moment, I'm going to ask Light if I can borrow L's car keys okay?"

Mello's pov:

I watched from my place by the stairs as Matt led a girl out of the building, my fists tightened angrily and tears threatening to fall from my face. She kissed him, and then he takes her out to the car with L's keys? I couldn't even think, I could only process what I had just seen.

I could feel that familiar anger bubbling up in my stomach, and I only had a vague explanation for it. Just, how could he? Tonight was about friends, not hooking up with some random girl. Or maybe she wasn't so random, maybe he has known her for awhile by now. I couldn't believe it, my Matt, my best friend, taking some girl out..I couldn't think about it, the image made my stomach churn. I should have expected this, he is bi, but he had never ever even shown an interest in girls. I felt betrayed by my own best friend.

With a huff I turned around and marched down the hallway, going past the room where the game of monopoly was currently on hold. All the way down towards the bathroom where I entered and promptly slammed the door behind myself. No sooner than the door closed did I smack my fist against the marble wall, cringing as pain seared through my knuckles, but I hardly paid attention to it as I sunk down to the floor and into a position I wouldn't even let Matt see me in. Curled up with my head buried in my knees.

"Dammit Matt" I whispered through faint sobs. "What are you doing to me? You just-" I paused there. What did he do? Go out with a girl like a normal teenager would, though he abandoned the game..No. I had no reason to feel this way.

"Fuck!" I groaned, slamming my fist against the linoleum flooring. "Why Matt, why do you always have to be there? And now I think..." I trailed off through choked sobs, curling into myself even more. "I can't, I can't, this is supposed to be just a phase, like every other teenager.."

Beyond's Pov:

"Beyond, rewash those, we can't have unclean dishes" Sachiko told me has she walked past the sink on her way out of the kitchen. I grumbled in response, but complied, pulling the dishes out of the rack and dumping them dejectedly into the water once again. I disliked dishes, L could do them perfectly, but I could never, and they looked just fine to me.

I sighed, whatever, there were worse things than dishes to deal with... Shaking the thought from my head, I peaked into the living room where Matt and Mello were currently sitting. A familiar dark cloud settled over them, I frowned, ever since we got back from the party last night they had been tense, Mello mostly, but Matt was certainly effected. I cocked an eyebrow as Matt questioned Mello once again about his mood, while Mello only shrugged him off, saying it was nothing, once again.

"Mels, something is wrong, stop saying its nothing" Matt demanded of him firmly. Only to earn another huff as Mello crossed his arms.

"I'm fine, just leave it okay? It doesn't concern you.." He trailed off as Matt only glared at him, eventually raising a defiant eyebrow.

"Mello, we are best friends, of course it concerns me" The redhead told his friend pointedly, though Mello didn't look like he was going to budge.

"Hey guys?" I questioned after another small bout of silence, earning two irritated looks.

"What?" Mello grumbled.

"I was just wondering if you would like me to leave so you can talk" I suggested, though I knew there was no point. If they wanted they could just leave themselves. Matt was probably in the process of figuring it out anyways, I could see it in his expression. The boy was bright, I'd give him that, But he was also ignorant to things he didn't want to know.

"That won't be necessary, we don't have anything to talk about" Mello huffed, turning his gaze back to Matt's concerned one. "There isn't, so stop giving me that puppy look, Matt" He told the boy as his friends face turned into one of hurt, but also in faint understanding.

"Mell-"

"No, there is nothing to talk-"

"Did you see that girl kiss me last night, is that it?" The younger teen demanded, while Mello froze on the spot. I just turned back to my sink of dishes, discretely paying attention to their conversation.

"What kiss?" The blond asked, though even I could tell he was lying through his teeth.

"Mello she was drunk, I pushed her away and then when she said she was going to drive home I offered her a ride. I couldn't just let her drive home drunk like that" The striped boy rushed, not even pausing in his sentence as he explained. While Mello only snorted and stood up from his seat.

"Why would I care about you kissing a girl? You can do what you want you know" He told Matt as he began to walk away.

"Mello wait" Matt piped, jumping from his seat as well, preparing to follow the blond.

"No, fuck off, your bothering me" Mello grumbled.

Making up my own mind, I cut into their clear disagreement. "Guys, I have to pick up some things for supper tonight, do you two want to come to the market with me? you can get some chocolate Mello, I'll pay" I added, seeing the incredulous look on both boys' faces.

Mello paused, before he decidedly shrugged, cooling down slightly from his previous demeanor, "What time?" he asked, this time only a faint undertone of frustration in his voice.

"Thirty minutes" I supplied.

He looked thoughtful for a minute, and I thought he was going to decline until he spoke up. "Alright, let me get dressed" He said, before promptly exiting the room, the sound of his footsteps following his exit as he made his way up the stairway.

Matt stared in his direction for a moment, before sighing lightly and following. I sighed as well once the redhead was out of view, turning back to my dishes and hurrying to finish them with a frown. The least Matt could do was thank me, Mello would have most likely gotten way more angry then that if I didn't interrupt, and now I was obligated to make supper.

"Its called katsudon" I supplied, looking at my list again, "Its the only thing I know how to cook" I added admittedly.

"katsdoom?" Matt asked, a confused expression on his face.

"No, katsudon, Kat-tsu-don" I corrected slowly, but absentmindedly as I sifted through a shelf of nori.

"Oh, katsudon" The redhead realized, nodding sheepishly.

"You know Japanese fluently, but you have trouble pronouncing katsudon?" I asked him incredulously, raising my eyebrows as I handed a package of nori to the counter clerk.

Matt shrugged in response, "Just because I can speak Japanese doesn't mean I have to be able to pronounce every dish you know" He countered while crossing his arms.

I nodded as I received my purchases in a bag, and turned back to Matt. "I guess, but anyways, where did Mello go?" I asked him, earning an expertly confused expression from the boy.

"What do you mean?" He asked as he turned to look behind himself, a smirk formed on my face, as his lips formed an 'oh' in realization. I had noticed Mello leaving the second we arrived at this shop, I just didn't mention it, I doubted he was going to get into trouble anyways. Matt then turned back to me "When did he leave?" he questioned curiously.

I only shrugged, beginning to walk away from the shop and down the crowded pathway. Matt followed behind me, probably hoping that I knew where his blond friend went as his eyes flitted around the market grounds. "Knowing him, he will find us eventually" I told the stripe clad boy, earning an agreeing nod, though he didn't stop his visual search as we came up to another shop full of spices.

Taking my time, I found everything I needed from the shop, before paying and moving on to an indoor meats shops. I dislike the smell of these shops, ever since I got to Japan really. They smelt fishy, mainly that was what I hated, but they did tend to carry fancy jams for whatever reason, so it was generally worth it.

I made my way to their jam shelf, carefully observing the brands until I found the one I wanted and picked it up gingerly, copying L's signature movement with my thumb and middle fingers. I was painfully aware of Matt's inquiring gaze as I did this, and turned my head to look at him, catching him slightly by surprise. "Yes?" I asked, knowing what he wanted to ask, But it was fun to play with the awkward boy.

"Uh, nothing" He replied, shaking his head and shoving his hands into his pockets much like Light would do, not like mine or L's way.

I snorted, going over to the counter and asking the clerk for nine pork loin chops, I waited patently as the clerk went into the back to get what I needed. Meanwhile Matt was looking a little antsy, whether is was from Mello disappearing or me catching his expression I didn't know, though it was probably a mix of both. The two were quite inseparable, and I suspected that they had been together 24-7 since they were little. Not the greatest thing, but who was I to talk, Me and A were like that, until I had to leave..no, I couldn't go telling myself that, we were supposed to come here together. I frowned, letting my eyes shift to the floor as all the hurt from that day came flooding back, the memory never seemed to go away.

"Beyond?" Matt questioned, his head tilted to the side as he noticed my sudden change in disposition.

"Yea?" I responded tonelessly, bringing my gaze to his face.

"Are you okay, you look..." He trailed off, not able to describe my expression out loud.

"I'm fine, just remembered something" Something I would rather forget at this point, I reminded myself. Just then the door to the shop swung open and a cheerful blond teen entered the store, walking over to us smoothly with a bag in hand.

Matt's attention immediately shifted to Mello, before he spoke up "Where'd you go?" He questioned as the blond came up beside him.

"Chocolate shopping, is that really a question?" The blond supplied sarcastically, pulling a fancy English chocolate bar out of the bag pointedly before dropping it back in.

Matt nodded "You could have told me, not just left" he told the blond, earning a smirk.

"That would have ruined the point"

That earned a raised eyebrow from the redhead, "Exactly what point?"

"That would ruin it too" The blond supplied, and this time Matt only shook his head with a sigh and let a slight smile come onto his lips, glad that his friend was in a much better mood then previously.


	4. If you have a feeling, think on it

disclaimer: I don't own Deathnote, all rights belong to Tsugumi Ohba and Takashi Obata.

L's pov:

I watched Light out of the corner of my eye, while also keeping my attention on Beyond and Naomi playing the closing of their song. Light got mad at me this morning, in his own little denying way, but still mad. I had an inkling of suspicion why, but I didn't want to say anything, he would most certainly just deny it anyways. So I just kept my eye on him today, I would find out eventually what it really was that was on his mind.

The song came to a close with Beyond strumming the guitar and Naomi at the electric piano, the base of the sound raising higher before it dropped completely and ended.

I raised my hands in applause, alongside Light, Matt and Mello. Though the style of music wasn't my forte, I had to admit it was good. The thing was, Beyond was only in the band club so he could be closer to Naomi, not because he liked music. If he was doing it for love of the sound, then he might have been able to get into a great musical school. The boy had talent, he just didn't have ambition for it, right now he just wanted the girl, sadly.

Beyond let a grin on his face and high five'd Naomi, before hopping off of the small stage and walking over to us, Naomi just shortly behind.

"Well? Whatcha think?" He asked, his eyes drifting over all of us, though when he met mine his expression changed slightly. He was smart enough to know that I didn't agree with his methods.

"It's was great, you and Naomi are a perfect team" Light congratulated politely, while Mello nodded in agreement.

"It was, you guys could make a CD out of it" Matt agreed enthusiastically.

Beyond bowed mockingly, "Why thank you, but I couldn't have done it without this fine young lady" He gestured to Naomi, who chuckled modestly, but only made her way over to sit on a chair beside Matt. I caught Beyond's barely hidden frown when she did this, but he had quickly covered it up as he took his own seat in front of us. "Well I'm glad you like it, who knows where this will go" He chuckled, his gaze flitting over to Naomi briefly.

"Yea, and you only started playing instruments when we got here right?" Matt started, eyes alight. The teen seeming to have an interest in anything to do with technology, even instruments. "Thats been what, a month? You'll definitely get much better than now, considering you're already really good"

Beyond nodded in agreement, "It's likely, but anyways I was curious, how have you guys been doing in your own clubs? We haven't talked to much this last week, seems we have all been pretty busy"

"Um.." Matt leaned back in his chair thoughtfully "..Well our club is trying to make an Iphone minigame, kinda like flappybird but a little bit different" He stated, but he didn't seem very excited about it. It wouldn't have been to much of a leap to think that he has already made a code basically the same as the game required.

Mello nodded "And I'm sure you've found out that I'm going to be in the tennis game tomorrow?"

Beyond shrugged, "You won't win though-" that statement earned a scowl from Mello "-No one can beat L and Light" He finished.

"But me" Mello stated, turning to look at us with a grin "You're going to experience loss for the first time in your life L, Light"

I nodded "I'm sure we will" I agreed, knowing there was quite a chance. Mello had taken it upon himself to train until he fell over, once he realized; after Light challenged him, that he couldn't beat us. The boy was a case, and nowhere near as good as us at the game. Different levels of experience putting him lower on the scale. But Light wasn't really feeling in the mood for competition, and I didn't take it all that seriously anymore, it was more of a pastime if anything, I focused more on the extra classes that Light and I took. Whereas Mello took it as seriously as he possibly could, if anything, that motivation would give him a great chance.

Mello scowled at my statement, probably hoping that I would have argued, and let out a huff as he leaned back in his chair.

It was then that the door to the clubroom clicked open, revealing a girl in brown pigtails and a white dress shirt and skirt. Linda, I immediately recognized the girl as Near's friend.

"Hi guys" She chirped, hopping into the room, and sure enough Near followed behind shortly, a lock of the boy's pale hair entwined in his fingers as he shuffled inside.

"Hello, Linda, Near, how are you?" Light greeted courteously, though I'm sure even Near noticed that, as usual, Light really didn't care. I sent the boy a look, that he returned with a shrug, irritating me just slightly. Light's bad mood was starting to get on my nerves a little.

"He're great, actually Near just signed up for the art club with me" She told us all with a cheerful smile, while Near just looked his usual indifferent.

"Really? I didn't take you for an artsy person Near" Mello spoke teasingly, earning a glare from the pale teen. Mello had really taken to teasing the boy.

"It is similar to making puppets, I find it quite enjoyable actually" Near replied calmly, leaving no indication that he noticed Mello's mocking tone.

This earned a snort from Mello, and a mumbled 'Child' under his breath. Meanwhile Linda was looking in between the two, unsure of what was going on.

Matt's Pov:

I smiled at Mello's back as he walked onto the tennis court, his blond hair blowing lightly in the wind as he made his way to the left side of the flat.

Today's game wasn't between any other schools, but to determine the winner in our school. It was more of a challenge and a test, to see who can beat who, and usually the top competitors of this game went on to compete with other schools. Though essentially it didn't put you on a list, it earned you reputation, and it was fun for everyone to have to compete with each other.

As expected, the top scores were made up of a few kids that I didn't recognize, Mello, Light and L. Though now, the top scores were left between Mello and L, as L had beat Light just previously.

From watching L and Light play before, I was amazed. Even though I really could care less about any sports, between L and Light it looked like more of a battle to the death than a game. It was quite impressive, and almost made me want to try it out. Though I wouldn't, I was way too under-fit to play the game, I would probably pass out trying to score a point.

Mello took his place across from L, ball and racket in hand while he waited for the starting signal. Even from here I could see the pure determination in his eyes, given that look, no one would doubt that he could win.

"Game start!" The line judge called, and on the signal, Mello tossed the ball up in the air and effectively hit it with the racket. Sending it across the court to L, who received the ball easily and hit it back to Mello. And then the game was on, Mello ran and caught the ball, sending it flimsily back to L with a curse. Once again L hit the ball back with ease, sending it back to Mello at a higher speed than previously.

This caught Mello off guard, earning L his first point.

"Love-15!" The line judge voiced.

Then the ball was in L's hand, being sent off to Mello, this time Mello ran a sent it back to L. Who caught it and hit it back to Mello with ease. This went on for seven more hits before Mello sent off a spin ball, though L expected it, it was to late and the ball hit cement before L could do anything about it.

Cheers erupted on Mello's small side of fans as the score was called. I let a grin take over my face, pairing with Mello's own on the grounds bellow.

"15-15!"

Mello's grin stayed put as he prepared to serve, bouncing the ball on the ground a few times before throwing it in the air. I knew as soon as he hit the ball though, that he was getting ahead of himself.

The ball went to L before it was back, and when Mello hit it it landed out of grounds.

Mello scowled at L, while the ravenette only smile sheepishly at him and mouthed, 'Try better next time'.

"15-30!"

Then it was off once again, with L serving and Mello more determined than ever before after his lost point.

Mello hit the ball back, sending it with a spin and L just barely catching it, before it was back at Mello with the same technique. too many hits to count later L missed the ball, earning Mello a point.

"30-30!" The line judge called, followed by catcalls and cheers.

Mello's next serve went off without a hitch, with L catching it and sending it back with a backhand. Mello, caught off guard with the move, quickly ran to hit the ball, sending it effectively back over the net to L with a topspin shot.

The game continued, both Mello and L's points climbing up until four sets went by, both teens sweating profusely and breathing hard as they started on their final set.

L served first, and then it continued. The balls whizzing by with many different styles, though the teens stayed pretty well tied the whole time. L scored the first point, the line judge calling "15-love!" before Mello served. From there, their points continued to climb, both sides to stubborn to lose.

"15-15!"

"15-30!"

"40-15!"

"30-40!"

"40-40!"

the deciding round, Mello served, and L caught the ball sending it back to Mello once again.

I didn't even notice my shoulders tense up as I watched, or my hands form into fists. Too busy silently rooting Mello on from my seat and watching the game intently as it came to an end.

The last shot, L hit the ball back with a childlike level and, Mello not expecting such premature hit, missed.

"40-game! 2 sets to three!" L won.

Mello frowned, panting heavily as he wiped the sweat from his forehead and let his shoulders slouch. Meanwhile L came over to him, holding out his hand. Mello reluctantly took the gesture and gingerly shook L's hand. A few words were exchanged between the two, before they both began to walk to the changing rooms. Light catching up with L and holding him back as soon as they were off of of the court, while Mello continued on.

I got up from my own seat, and began to make my way through the groups of teenagers until I reached Mello, panting lightly as I reached him just by the door of the changing rooms.

"Mello" I spoke up, catching his attention as he stopped to look at me. "That was great" I exclaimed, pulling my goggles over my head as I stopped in front of him with a grin. Up this close I could see just how tired he was, his lips dry, his hair soaked with sweat and plastered to his face, and his clothing damp.

"But I didn't win" He told me blatantly, earning a sincere frown.

"Oh come on Mello, L has been playing for years and you only started less than a month ago. Besides, you really gave him a hard time, that wasn't easy for either of you" I scolded his downcast behavior cheekily, and much to my satisfaction, earned a smile from the blond.

"You're right, but I'll definitely win next time, you can be sure of that" He told me, giving a thumbs up. It was when he did that, that I noticed the blotches of red on his hands,

Instinctually I grabbed his raised hand and held it open, looking at the blistered skin with a painful expression. "Mello-" I started, only to be cut off.

"What can I say, I have small hands" He protested, pulling back the limb as I raised my head to give him a concerned look. It wasn't that I didn't think he could handle a few blisters, I just worried that old habits would resurface.

Seeing my expression he scowled. "Matt, I'm not going to do anything like that, you don't need to worry, I'm not that stupid anymore" He chuckled near the end.

"Alright" I agreed, letting it go. I knew my concern was unfounded, he was just pushing himself to much so that he would win. "Go get cleaned up, you stink" I commanded him, giving a little push in the direction on the changing rooms with a chuckle, he chuckled as well and complied, opening the door and taking a step inside before tilting his head back to me.

"And Matt, you really don't have to worry about that anymore okay?" He told me, his voice in a rare soft tone.

I smiled in return "I know, I wasn't going too" I assured.

Mello's Pov:

I was tired by the end of that match, and even now at midnight, my legs hurt and my hands burned underneath the gloves that Matt had given me. It was intense, and I might have been quite angry about losing if it wasn't for the fact that I really did give L and Light both a hard time. I doubted many people have even posed a challenge to them, and I was practically tied the whole time. For now, second was okay for me.

Despite my aching limbs and drooping eyes though, I stayed true to my intentions and stayed up until midnight, and then, after making sure that Matt was indeed asleep, I crept into the hallway, and into the living room.

It wasn't a surprise to me that Matt had forgotten his birthday, well, he might have just not mentioned it, but knowing him he simply forgot. He had done that ever since I could remember.

I opened up the jacket closet and reached into the top shelf until I found what I was looking for, an orange wrapped present box. I pulled the object out skillfully, before moving across the room and placing it on the coffee table.

Despite my feelings for him, that I had settled in the back of my head and decided to ignore, I wanted to do this for him. I still loved him platonically, he was still the best friend of my life, and I wanted to make him happy.

I went into the kitchen and pulled out another box, this one had a bakery logo on it, the name of the shop surrounded by a red fox. Before I found two plates, two forks, and a knife. Setting those on the counter I shuffled around the kitchen some more until I found a small bottle of sake. I didn't like the drink so much as vodka, but it would do the job, or in this case, the celebration.

With everything that I needed from the kitchen, I grabbed the present box, and brought all of the precariously balanced items upstairs in my arms.

Once I was back in our bedroom, I was relieved to find Matt still asleep in his bed. Though it wouldn't have ruined to much, it was still more fun to have to wake him up. I then set everything on my bed, before making my way over to Matt's.

I couldn't help but take a moment to look over his sleeping form in the darkness. As the moonlight spilled over his cheekbones and his hair, turning the locks to an orange more than a red and making his faint dusting of freckles more apparent. In the daylight you would have had to look really close, but in the dim silver lighting they could be seen easily, more like when he was younger. Really, with the visibility of his freckles, and the lighting sharpening his now sleepy features, he looked looked more like his younger self now then in any pictures from back then.

I found myself smiling as I pictured the teen as a child, when he was this kid running around with a DS, oversized goggles, and a baggy striped shirt. It was amazing that we became friends really, but we did, and I'm yet to find out if that was a bad decision or a good one yet. I was leaning towards the latter despite everything going on.

Shaking my steadily drifting thoughts from my head, I raised my hand a gave his shoulder a light shake.

"Matt, Mattie make up" I whispered, and as expected, Matt being the light sleeper he is, reacted almost immediately with a squirm. I took this to pull the blanket off of him a little and shook him again. This time his eyes opened, and he turned to look up at me sleepily.

"Wha? Mells?" He spoke incoherently.

"Happy birthday" I stated, and his expression quickly morphed into sleepy confusion.

"What- Oh" He sat up in realization, looking at me in mild surprise as he clicked everything together. "I forgot"

I chuckled, " I expected you to" I told him as I leaned over his bed to turn on his lamp, the light flooded his half of the room, causing him to cringe away from it for a moment as his eyes adjusted. But as soon as they did, he caught sight of the display on my side of the room, and his eyes widened.

"You did that?" He questioned dumbfoundedly, before making to get up from his bed. Lucky for me, Matt didn't often sleep shirtless or anything, but in classic flannel pajamas. So waking him up wasn't any more awkward than it needed to be.

"Yea, don't make a big deal okay? I just wanted it to be special, its your eighteenth after all" I told him as he sat down on my bed, slowly waking himself up as he picked up the bottle of sake with a sideways look. "I won't" he assured as I made my ways over and sat beside him, picking up his present and handing it to him in the process.

"Here" I offered him the gift, which he took easily, passing it between his hands for awhile thoughtfully before looking up at me. His eyes much more awake now than before.

"Is it a gaming system?" He guessed, earning a chuckle from me.

"Maybe, maybe not, open it"

"Okay dokey" He chuckled, pulling off the lid of the box. He stuck his hands inside, shuffling through the tissue paper until he pulled out a smaller white box, labeled 'DreamCast'. His eyes widened immediately and he looked up at me in surprise.

"Were'd you get this?" He asked me excitedly, before he proceeded to look at each angle of the box in amazement.

I shrugged, a smile of my face as I watched him inspect the object. "It was lucky, thats all I'll say"

"Thank you, so much" He gushed as he dropped the box and wrapped me in a tight hug, holding me tightly. His body was warm, I liked it too much, but I hugged him back anyways.

"I'm glad you like it, but there a few more things in there still" I told him warmly, causing him to draw back and pull some more paper out of the box. Next he pulled out a chain necklace with a gold circle tag on it, the words 'Hermitage Museum' engraved on it. I tensed up as he froze, staring at the trinket with an unreadable expression for a few moments.

I knew he had bad memories with that necklace, But it was also the first time we met, So good memories and bad ones alike. It was risky, giving it to him now, but I also knew he would appreciate it, at least I hoped.

"H-how?" He stuttered eventually, eyes not leaving the trinket as he placed it in his palm, staring at the engraved letters.

"It's not the original one, that's probably still lost somewhere in the woods, but its genuine" I offered, watching as his eyes began to water. Feeling bad suddenly, and regretting getting it for him I leaned over and wrapped him in a hug.

"I'm sorry, I guess I shouldn't have" I apologized, Matt was silent for a moment, his nose buried in my shirt and creating a slight dampness there. But then he spoke, relieving me.

"Its okay, I'm glad you got it actually. I could feel his fingers tracing the metal accessory along my back, and relaxed.

"You sure?"

"Yea" Was his silent voice, then he pulled away, looking at me now. "I'm glad, it reminds me of the first time I met you" He stated, a smile crossing his features, "Thank you" Then he looked back at his present box and pulled it onto his lap.

"The rest isn't so great, just some other things I found" I supplied as he pulled out a small set of DreamCast games. He nodded in response and quickly shifted through the titles with a smile, before going back to the box, this time pulling out a pair of green goggles. His eyes flitted to me, with a raised eyebrow.

"Is this you way of telling me my current ones are getting old?" He questioned with a chuckle, I shrugged innocently in response.

"Maybe, I also thought you could use a change" I informed him, earning a snort.

"Thanks, but green?"

"Oh, come on" I complained, "Don't wear them if you don't like them, I won't be offended"

He laughed at that, his eyes raising to me and sparkling mirthfully. "I'm just fooling around, I love them" He told me as he slapped the accessory over his eyes, as if to prove that he meant it. Though I could tell he did, his face was glowing with his smile, and he looked beautiful if I had to find a word. I knew I shouldn't have been thinking like that, but I couldn't help it, today was special.

"Okay, there's one more thing in there" I told him, and this time he just dumped the box upside down, making mess of the tissue paper on my bed, with a small tin box landing on top.

Matt picked it up curiously, before recognition crossed his features and he made to open it right away, peeling off the plastic seal to reveal a pile of chocolate coated candies inside.

"I haven't had these in ages" He exclaimed as he popped a single square in his mouth. I chuckled, grabbing a piece of the candy myself.

"Just make sure not to eat them too fast, I had to get them imported from Winchester and I don't know when I can do that next"

He nodded in understanding, shutting the container and set it in the box, followed by everything else, though he took a moment to look over the DreamCast again before he set it inside.

"I can't believe you actually found that" He told me as he set it in the box and put the lid overtop, bringing his gaze to me, before he embraced me in yet another hug. "Thank you so much" He told me once again in his childish voice.

"Anything for you Mattie" I told him, pulling away after a second and leaning over the bed to grab the cake. "Here" I told him as I handed him the box, pulling the lid open as I did, and revealing the Boston creme cake. His eyes brightened immediately.

"You know me to well Mells" He told me as he set the cake down and grabbed the utensils and plates.

"I do" I agreed, a smile naturally appearing across my face.

L's Pov:

I paused at the door to Matt and Mello's room, curiously cocking my head to the side as I heard Matt's voice chirp a 'thank you'. Followed by Mello's 'Anything for you Mattie' using the boy's nickname.

I smiled around my lollipop in realization, recalling the date. February 1st, Matt's birthday, according the his records. Mello must have thrown him a small birthday party. Those two are certainly close, I thought as I continued to walk away from their door.

Like Light and I, they had known each other since they were young, and though they were probably closer than Light and I, it was pretty well the same. Though Mello's feelings for Matt separated the example. Or maybe they didn't, I paused in my steps at the thought.

It really wasn't that far fetched, if Light liked me in a similar way that Mello liked Matt. The thought had been at the back of my head all week, all day even, it just seemed surreal for Light to feel that way about me. Though with his attitude lately, it was much more of a possibility than I had given it credit to be before.

Though it wasn't completely me just not considering it completely, I was a little scared of it. If Light really did feel that way about me, I wouldn't know how to react, respond, and I wouldn't know what to do. I had never thought of romantic feelings before, and it was completely out of my league.

I made my way to Light and I's bedroom, opening the door quietly and slipping inside of the dark space. My gaze drifted to Light's sleeping form, and I stared at him for a moment in thought.

It was how Light had refrained from meeting my eyes as of late, how he put a purposeful space inbetween us on a daily basis. How his demeanor changed when he saw a gay couple. There were a lot of things that pointed to the conclusion, really it was hard to chalk it up to simply him coming out to us. On that topic, there is the fact that he told Beyond first, and not me.

I didn't like emotions, I took them as a challenge more often than I did as a feeling. Therefore I didn't like having to contemplate them, because I could never be sure if I was right. It wasn't logic, and so emotions were my weakness.

After a moment I made up my mind, and I leaned down to shake Light's shoulder, trying to wake the teen up. Easily he rolled over and looked up at me, almost as if he hadn't been asleep at all, but I knew better than that.

"What?" He demanded quietly, his eyes boring sharply into mine. Light didn't like to be woken up, though he had put up with it eventually, as I made a habit of doing it a lot when we were younger.

It was a good way to get things out of people, when their heads were foggy and their thoughts unclear. So I had always done it, if possible, when I wanted an answer from somebody.

"Light-Kun I would like to ask you a question if thats alright with you" I told him, earning a narrow eyed expression from the slightly younger boy.

"Go ahead" He told me, his voice void of amusement.

"I was wondering if you like me" I told him, watching his eyes widen a fraction as he placed together what I was asking him. It was something that was very hard to notice, even if you were looking for it, especially because he hid the reaction almost immediately.

"You woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me a stupid question like that?" He chuckled, rolling over onto his side again. I stayed silent, waiting for his answer. When he realized that I wasn't going to leave until he responded, he did just that.

"No L, you're my best friend, that a ridiculous notion in itself" He told me, mumbling the last part quietly.

"Alright, thank you for your answer Light-Kun" I told him, before walking back over to my laptop, and politely leaving the teen to go back to sleep.

But that little conversation confirmed my suspicions, it was in the way he responded. How his voice raised to a lilt, and how he forced that chuckle, hardly noticeable, but I knew him well enough to know when he was lying.

For some reason this brought a tiny smile to my lips, though it was probably just because I was certain of it now. Certain that I was right.

I sat down on my bed and went back to finishing up the last few sentences of my essay on Russian history, my thoughts easily shifting back into studying mode.

'To this day, replica's and evidence of Russia's history is kept in the Hermitage Museum, locatated in St. Petersberg. Along with a library, filled with books on the royal bloodlines that come from the country's history...'


	5. If you're asked about it, answer

Disclaimer: I don't own Deathnote, if I did, you would see a full episode of Wammy's House instead of just a few minutes.

Matt's pov:

I stepped out of the classroom at the signal of the bell, just behind the rest of our class, with Mello behind me. It was unusual, for me to be the one in the lead, that was for sure. Usually Mello fell into place in front of me, and that was just how it was.

But lately everything had been changing, it seemed. Mello was running through an unusual amount of inner drama, day after day. Though one day he would be happy, another he would be quiet, and hanging around in the background until something important distracted him.

I didn't understand, at first I had thought it was just stress, but now...I didn't know, and as an old habit of his; if I asked, he wouldn't feel the need to tell me anything at all. It was irritating, and I couldn't figure it out. I even went as far as asking L, but he wouldn't tell me anything. By that, I mean he surely knows, but won't tell me for whatever reason.

What could be going on that is so distressing?

I quickly dumped my books in my locker, before waiting for Mello to place his inside of the compartment neatly, as per usual. When he was done he stood up, running a hand through his hair briefly as he turned to me. His blue eyes meeting my own the second he did. His expression was of a deer caught in headlights for just a moment, as if I had just caught him doing something he shouldn't have been doing.

Nodding behind myself awkwardly and attempting to dismiss the expression, I gestured for us to go to the lunch hall with a; "Lets go"

Mello nodded, coming up beside me as I began to walk.

"I'm sorry" He mumbled to me halfway down the hall, earning a sideways look from me.

"I don't even know what you apologizing for" I told him pointedly, but not harshly, I didn't want to aggravate him, but I wasn't exactly happy with his mood either. He only nodded in response, continuing to walk down the hall with me. Other students were speed walking past us, hurrying to get to the lunchroom with boundless amounts of chatter. So the half of the walk me made, most of the students were ahead of us.

It was when we were just about to enter the lunchroom, that L and Light came up to us from the crowds. Light carrying a bag in his hands, while L's were empty. I raised an eyebrow at the duo, but could barely open my mouth to question what they were doing before they came up to us hurriedly. L grabbing my sleeve lightly, and pulling me in the direction we just came from with an ordered; "Come on".

I followed them compliantly with a quizzical expression, glancing behind myself briefly to see that nobody from the lunchroom had seemed to notice us. At least we weren't going to get in trouble for whatever we were doing, but still, exactly what were we doing?

Mello seemed just as clueless as he kept with us, and when we took a corner into one of the more quiet hallways and slowed down, he was the one to question L and Light.

"What are we doing?" He almost snapped the question, irritability evident in his tone.

This caused Light to turn and look at us, his eyes alight for once, while L continued walking ahead "L got a key to go onto the roof" He supplied, still walking hurriedly.

"Yet we are clearly not allowed too, so he stole it?" I questioned exasperatedly, though I wasn't going to turn back, It sounded interesting.

Light only nodded, and took up a light jog for a second to catch up to L, at this, L turned his head to look at us "You don't have to come, but you should".

I nodded, and with a glance at Mello, who didn't appear completely adverse to it, grabbed his hand and caught up with the two teens ahead of us.

After a quick walk up a few flights of stairs, we arrived at the door to what was apparently the roof. We waited a moment for L to fish the keys out of his notably oversized jeans, before he unlocked the door and with the sound of creaking hinges, opened it. Causing sunlight to float into the stairway, along with a light breeze.

"Here we are" He told us while holding the door open. Me, Mello and Light both exited onto the flat, shortly followed by L. The roof was windy, though surprisingly clean, I would have thought a few puddles and trash in the corners, but the most mess was just a few leaves floating around.

"Come on, I can't carry this forever" Light stated, walking ahead of us and towards a wall, angled in just the right way so that the wind was only a breeze.

I followed, and sat down on the cement beside Light where he was pulling lunch boxes out of the bag. We were soon followed by Mello and L, as L took a box for himself and settled down with it. Mello was looking around the space for a while, and I got the feeling that he quite liked it up here, then he spoke up.

"Do you guys come up here often?" He questioned L, but it was Light that responded.

"We used to a lot when L first came here with Beyond, but we haven't for almost a year" He supplied, while pulling the seal off his lunch box. I nodded, picking up a box and handing it to Mello before grabbing my own.

"So, you've never gotten caught?" I questioned them, meanwhile struggling to open the plastic seal on my own box.

"No, we haven't" L responded this time, "You see, Light was a brat when I first came here, and this was a good place to knock some sense into him" L spoke with amusement, while Light was sending him a glare.

Mello snorted. "As expected, and he still is" The blond scoffed.

"I don't know what you're talking about" The offended teen denied, a frown on his lips "I'm a nice person"

This earned a smirk from L, and from the look on Light's face he knew just what L was going to say. "Says the kid who set up firework traps all over my room when I first got here" L complained, "It took me hours to disarm all those, it was quite rude"

"Oh shut up, you weren't supposed to find them, if you had just stepped on them you could have been saved from the trouble"

"Huh" L sounded disbelievingly, before picking up a slice of raw fish from his lunch box and eyeing it with distrust. "Anyways, you know I don't like fish Light-Kun, why did you get me this one?" He questioned, meanwhile Light was giving him a narrow eyed glare. L payed no attention to Light's look, instead opting to stare at the piece of fish with scrunched features.

Eventually Light gave up with the glare and responded, "Whether you think so or not, only eating sweets isn't good for you" He said, turning to Mello and I "Wouldn't you agree?"

Mello shrugged, and I knew exactly what was crossing his mind, for once in this day. Seeing as Mello wasn't going to, I responded "L's pretty healthy considering, so in my opinion it's fine" I told him, and caught the mildly pleased expression on L's face as he set his box down.

"At least somebody has some sense, unlike Light-Kun" He said, and at that Light huffed.

"Okay L, your jabs are just getting annoying now" The brunette told him, and to my surprise L nodded in compliance.

"I will stop then"

"Good" Light looked pleased, but also a little curious at the compliance at well. Nontheless he continued eating, his gaze going over to Mello and I. "So what's going on with you two anyways? I can't seem to figure it out" Mello tensed up beside me, as the question was mostly directed at him, but I as well didn't know how to answer.

It seemed like L was going to say something, noticing my discomfort. But before he could, a voice interrupted us.

"Light! What are you doing up here?" All of our gazes jerked towards the roof door at once, a last minute reaction of panic on our faces. Until we realized who it was, as the blond began walking over to us at a quick pace. Of course L had thought it unnecessary to lock the door.

"You're not allowed up here" She scolded, her hands finding a place on her hips as her lips formed a pout.

"Misa, how did you know we were up here?" Light questioned calmly, though he had an undertone of annoyance in his voice.

"I saw you walking down this way- and I thought that we were having lunch together" She complained, While Light sighed exasperatedly and stood up to face the girl.

"We have lunch everyday, its not that big of a deal" The brunette reasoned, earning an upset look from Misa.

"But-"

"Misa, I get to spend some time with L alone you know, my world doesn't revolve around you" Light looked irritated, the most I had ever seen the teen since I had gotten here.

At Light's tone Misa looked upset, and a few tears streaked down her cheeks as she stared at him disbelievingly. "But Light, we're together, I thought you wanted to spend time with me" She reasoned quietly, and I got the feeling that even the oblivious girl had an idea what was going to happen. I sure had a good feeling, even though I really didn't think Light would actually do it.

Light let out a sigh, while raising his hands to Misa's shoulders and staring her right in the eyes.

"Misa"

"Yes Light?" The words were barely audible.

"I can't do this, I'm not in love with you so-" Misa looked helpless, it was the best way to describe it, but she was also almost angry. Sure enough, the girl couldn't believe that Light was actually dumping her. "I'm breaking up with you"

In one swift movement Misa pushed Light away, turning around on her heel and stomping across the roof, all the way to the door. We all watched the scene unfold, L looking curious, Mello bland, and Light almost relieved it seemed, though a little shocked with her reaction as he stared after her. Misa paused by the door, her hand on the handle as she tensed her shoulders.

"I hate you, Light!" She shouted in a pitched voice, clearly one choked with sobs, before she swung open the door and slammed it behind her. Light just stared after her for a moment, before his shoulders went slack and he walked back to his previous seat, flopping down on the pavement as if a weight was just taken of his shoulders, or added.

"I knew you didn't like her, but I didn't think you would actually dump her like that" L commented dryly, earning a simple huff from the other teen.

"She's to clingy, I'm tired of putting up with her" He told L as he picked up his lunch box, "She'll get over it eventually, it's fine"

L nodded, though it looked like he was trying to figure something out. I didn't know what he could possibly be trying to come up with, Misa was, like Light had said, way to clingy. I would have dumped her by now, that's for sure.

"How long have you and Misa been together?" I couldn't help but voice the question as Light raised his head.

"About four years, and even before then she was pretty well infatuated with me" He drawled as he picked up a small sushi roll, while I only nodded in response, going back to my own lunch box as L and Mello started up a conversation about last week's tennis match.

Mello's Pov:

I finished up the last few questions on my history exam, before slamming the book closed with a sigh and shoving it back into my bag. With a glance out my bedroom window, I realized that I had lost track of time during my assignment, and that it was getting late.

Currently everyone was either in their rooms or downstairs, Matt being downstairs, which was quite frankly, why I was up here in the safety of my, or rather, Matt's and I's room. My supposed crush on Matt had been the only thing on my mind lately, every second I was thinking about how nice he looked, how much I wanted to hold him close to me, how I wanted to kiss him..but then I realized I would have to be the luckiest person in the world for those fantasies to be real.

And now Matt knew something was very wrong, as well as L. Just, Matt didn't know what it was, and for that I was almost glad. But then again, maybe things would be easier if he knew..No. If he knew, things would just be so awkward.

I let out a long sigh as I let my gaze trail around our room, Matt's side was messy, with game cases thrown everywhere, cords, clothes and blankets that trailed onto my side, while mine was perfectly neat. I felt like I was choking when I thought of him or his belongings, it was the best description, and I hated that feeling.

What would it be like if I didn't have this crush? Is this what Misa felt like about Light? Or rather, still feels like? I felt bad for her, and I usually saved emotions like that for Matt and only Matt, but now I was overflowing with emotions, so I didn't blame myself in the least.

I brought my hands up to me face and let out a groan, I hated emotions so much in that moment. Silly things that caused drama, pain, and misery, but could be so wonderful. I couldn't help but think; love like this, its either wonderful or miserable, and right now I was in the latter.

Letting out another pained sigh, I stood up from my bed and exited my bedroom, noting that Near was still in his room playing with toys. Somehow he got away with pretending to be home sick from school, just so that he could build the Eiffel tower out of paper. If I wasn't already going through so much, I would have ratted him out, but I really couldn't be bothered. It was kind of amusing anyways.

Downstairs Matt and Beyond were talking about school, nothing in particular, girls of course, studies, and my tennis match, which was a failure if you ask me.

"Hey" I greeted as I walked into the room, catching Matt's attention right away, and Beyond's bored one as I approached the couch.

"Hey, whats up?" Matt replied.

I shrugged "I was just finishing up some school assignments" I told them as I rested my arms on the back on the couch inbetween the two. "From what I can tell all you guys are talking about school, so I'm not gonna bother asking" I drawled in a bored manner.

Matt chuckled at that, "Yea"

Beyond, who was fiddling with his finger nails until now, looked up at me then "Hey, Mello, who do you think would be a good match for Matt in school?"

I promptly frowned at him, I couldn't help it. Beyond was asking me who my -Crush? Love? Best friend that I wanted to kiss, would be a good match for?

Of course Beyond noticed the sudden change of expression, and though I was glad that Matt couldn't see it from this angle, it didn't mean that I wanted Beyond to acknowledge it.

"Whats wrong?" The older teen questioned, earning a shrug from me.

"Nothing, I just thought of something" I told them as I stood up straight, "Um, I'm gonna go watch a movie on my laptop I think" I stated unsteadily as I began to make my way up the stairs again. I could feel both Matt and Beyond's confused gazes on my back, and I was sure my face was red, my heartbeat was certainly beating out of my chest, that was for sure at least.

Whats wrong he asks? In that second it crossed my mind, however slightly, that I could have told them then, and if I had? Well I didn't know what would happen, I had a feeling it wouldn't be good though, I was almost certain that Matt didn't feel the same way about me.

when I reached my bedroom, I slammed the door behind me and promptly fell onto the bed, letting myself land face first into the already crumpled comforter. I couldn't breath, but right now I didn't care, not breathing would be fine price to pay if these feelings just went away.

It was then that I heard the creaking of floor boards and tensed up, easily recognizing Matt's footsteps. He had a habit of walking on the fronts of his feet, making his footsteps very silent, almost like Near's, and undeniably recognizable. If I wasn't already suffocating from the fabric on my bed, I would have held my breath anyways. He was coming here, obviously noticing something was wrong.

Something? Funny, because it seemed like everything was wrong at this point.

"Mello?" He questioned as he opened the door and walked into the room "I'm getting worried, you've been off all month and its only getting worse" He didn't seem perturbed that I didn't react, he probably expected something like that from me anyways.

I felt the bed sink down under his weight as he sat beside me, and cringed. He was too close, I could feel how warm he was, and it was almost painful at this point.

"Mello, look at me" His voice was firm now. "I really doubt you can breath like that" He sounded a little worried now, and that was right, my chest was constricting painfully and my throat was starting to hurt. Complying, I lifted myself up from the bed and moved into a sitting position, deciding that the position was to painful. At that, I had my back still partially turned to him as I started breathing again. It felt better to breath than to not, of course.

"Mello, you have to tell me, now, and there is no getting around it" He demanded, and I believed him. I had avoided his questions all month, even Matt, the usual pushover, could be the most stubborn person in the world if he wanted.

I opened my mouth, wanting to tell him so badly, but also wanting so badly not to, to just avoid it.

"Um-" I only noticed then, when I got that syllable out, that I was crying, my throat was constricted and my eyes watering. I hated this...

"Just say it, please"

And now he was begging me, Matt begging me, in all his seriousness.

"I-" I turned my head to him, looking at his face through my bangs. Concern was painted over all of his features, and I couldn't help but feel bad, the things racing through his head right now. He was probably imagining the worst possible scenario's, maybe I had cancer, maybe I killed somebody, maybe I joined a gang..

I put my hands to my face, letting out a choked sob as I did so, in response he put his hand on my back. I tensed up at the action, but I was more distracted with the tears falling into my hands in that moment.

"Mello-"

"I love you dammit!" I yelled, my voice cutting off into another round of sobs. Promptly I felt Matt's hand withdraw from my back, and many thoughts crossed my mind, along with a plummeting feeling that could be accounted to..Fear.

Matt's Pov:

He loves me? Well of course he loves me, we're best friends..

Oh.

I froze. Surely he didn't, the teenager who was crying in front of me right now, crying his heart out, he couldn't love me in that way, could he? I removed my hand from his back, somehow it just felt wrong to touch him, like I was..I didn't know, but that was my first instinct.

We were best friends, this had to be some sort of joke? Right? We have been best friends since we were little, not attracted to each other at all.

It didn't make any sense, it had to just be a crush. But then he was acting this way over a crush? I knew my deduction was wrong, Mello was smart, he wouldn't be acting this way over just a small crush, And the way he said it, he could have just said; I like you. But he went for love...

No, he can't love me like that. We're best friends..Not..No...

Slowly, like I was almost glued to the ground I stood up from the bed. Mello was less crying now, and more shaking uncontrollably, but that hardly processed with me. I felt like everything was a cloud, foggy, I couldn't think.

Mello couldn't love me, he just couldn't. It was wrong, so wrong, I didn't feel that way about him at all.

"You-" I paused, staring at the floor almost listlessly, "You can't do that"

I needed out of here, I couldn't breath. I couldn't be in the same room as him right now, let alone the same building. I needed out.

I didn't really think about it as I rushed out of our room, downstairs and into the bootroom. I grabbed my jacket, and slipped on my shoes sloppily, barely registering Beyond and L's inquiries as I rushed out the door.

He can't.

That is the only thing that went through my head as I flipped open my phone and scrolled through my contacts.

My heart was racing, and I felt like crying, I didn't know why. Maybe it was because Mello was, maybe it was because I couldn't love him, or maybe it was because it freaked me out. Nontheless I found Misa's number and dialed her up.

I just couldn't be around Mello right now.

L's Pov:

Me and Beyond both stared at the now closed door that Matt just rushed out of, silent for a few moments in confusion. Though I was piecing together what must have happened, I was still quite shocked nontheless.

Beyond was the first one to speak, his usual sarcastic tone in place, though it didn't go without a tinge of concern. "I'm assuming you know what just happened?"

I nodded, but offered no further explanation. A second went by, before Beyond got irritated at my lack of explanation.

"Well, are you going to tell me what just happened? Oh wise one?"

I shook my head disdainfully, about to explain, when a crash sounded from upstairs. I instantly clued in, and stood up from my seat, shortly followed by Beyond who was looking a mix between annoyed and curious. Another crash sounded, and I made my mind up as I began to hurry up the stairs, followed by Beyond.

"Mello?" I questioned when I reached the door, placing my palm over the handle and preparing to open it.

"Go the fuck away!"

"what happened?" I persisted, sharing a concerned glance with Beyond, and vaguely noting that Near and Light were now standing in the hallway beside their bedroom doors.

"Like you don't know already! Just leave me alone!" The blond shouted from the other side of the door, and in reaction I dropped my hand back to my side.

"Alright" I agreed, turning back to Beyond and the others, letting out a sigh I began to walk over to Light, where he was still positioned by our door.

"Hey, aren't you going to tell us what happened?" Beyond snapped, irritation crossing his features as I glanced back at him.

"You'll figure it out eventually" I told him, before proceeding to enter my room, sharing a knowing glance with Light as I passed him.

Mello would cool down eventually, and Matt would come back in a few days at the most, I was certain of that. I was just more concerned about what would happen afterwards.


	6. If you can't run away, run back

Disclaimer: I don't own Deathnote, If I did you would have seen more of L as a child.

L's Pov:

Mello had looked nothing but depressed since Matt had left, it was expected of course. His best friend didn't even want to look at him as far as he knew, and that thought was reinforced every second that Matt hadn't come back home or answered any of Mello's calls.

Right now the blond was sitting, curled up on the couch and staring at the tv. At the moment some cheap tv show was playing, though Mello most certainly wasn't paying attention. In fact he looked like he was somewhere else completely, thinking about Matt no doubt.

It had been two days, and Matt hadn't shown up to school, hadn't contacted us in any way, and though I knew that he was in fact staying at Misa's, Mello didn't. It was wearing at the teen, that was for sure. I had considered doing something, talking to Mello, or going to talk with Matt, but then I decided that it was probably not my place. Matt would probably just get upset, he needed time to process everything going on right now, needed time to process what he meant to Mello.

It was then, in my musings that the doorbell rang, causing Mello to raise his head and look at me with a questioning look, silently asking me if I knew who it was.

"Soichiro" I informed him as I uncurled my legs and stood up from the couch, making my way over to the door with my hands shoved in my pockets. Soichiro had forgotten the house keys this morning, and clearly Mello figured that out from the nod that he offered me. I made my way down the few steps and unlocked the door, pulling it open to indeed find Soichiro. The older man looked tired out, and as he greeted me and stepped inside he let out a long sigh.

"You're back early" I commented as he removed his shoes, but he only nodded as he slipped on a pair of slippers. I waited patiently, a slight bit concerned until he looked back up at me and spoke.

"Is Mello home right now?" He asked in a firm tone, earning a raised eyebrow from me.

"Of course he is, did you not hear from Sachiko about what happened?" I doubted it, Sachiko kept him in touch with the things that went on here when he was working hard like this.

He sighed again, while shaking his head. "I did, but I just got a call from the school, where is he?" He then questioned.

I simply pointed into the living room, earning a nod from him as he made his way into the next room, with me following behind shortly. Now Mello was sitting up properly, probably having heard our brief conversation and wanting an explanation. Though I could tell he was putting on a facade, the faint outline of tears around his eyes told me he was just as upset as the day before.

"Mello, I just got a call from the school" Soichiro stated as he took a seat on the other side of the couch, leaning forwards with his hands clasped in his lap. Mello narrowed his eyes, but nodded compliantly, urging Soichiro to continue. "They said Matt has not been at school in the last two days, and both of you are failing your assignments completely"

A frown formed on Mello's face, and I was sure that he was cursing Soichiro in his head. "So?" was his short and rather snarky response, causing Soichiro to let out a frustrated huff.

"Look, first, if you cannot keep your grades up we will have to send you back to England" This didn't faze Mello, he knew that if he went back, then so would Matt and their lives would just go back to normal for them once again. I was probably right when I assumed he considered running away just so he would end up back at Wammy's house "-and second. Wherever Matt is, he needs to come back soon, without my supervision and as an orphan from another country-"

"I don't know where the fuck he is!" Mello snapped as he shot up from his seat, his fists clenched at his side as he tried to refrain from punching his foster father. "I know what you're asking me, and I have no fucking idea where he is staying or how to get a hold of him. So leave me alone, I can't help you alright?" He snapped at Soichiro, breathing harshly as he slowly regained his composure.

Soichiro looked stunned as he stared up at the infuriated blond, though he got his own surprise under handle quickly and spoke back firmly. "You don't talk to me like that Mello" He scolded, only earning a snort in return as Mello began to make his way out of the room, scuffing his feet on the carpeted flooring on the way.

"I don't care" He muttered under his breath as he took the turn to go upstairs, leaving behind Soichiro and myself. I slowly turned my gaze from where Mello just was, to Soichiro, meeting his frustrated expression equally.

"Mello is under a lot of pressure, I can't say that what you just did was wise" I commented idly, earning a sigh. Soichiro now knew that Mello didn't do well under that kind of authority, that was for certain.

"I'm assuming you know where Matt is?" He then questioned me, looking even more worn out than he did when he first came inside.

"I do" I responded simply, but offered no other explanation as I turned and made my way to the kitchen. Soichiro, after so many years of knowing me, knew that I wouldn't tell him things that I didn't feel the need to tell him. So he didn't complain as I did this.

Matt's Pov:

"Mattie, you really need to go back, Mel-Mel is worried" Misa complained from the bathroom doorway where she was getting ready for bed. From my place on the couch I only gave a sigh in response and continued tapping buttons on my Psp.

I didn't want to go back, in fact I was terrified of looking at Mello again. My reaction to his confession was..childish. I should have stayed, I should have talked with him, but instead I just panicked and left. Really it was humiliating, and now I was to afraid to go back, he probably thinks I hate him, after all.

Misa let out a huff and began walking towards the couch, shamelessly dressed in nothing but some navy blue lingerie. I ignored her as she plopped down on the opposite side from me, and proceeded to pout in the hopes that I would give in and look up at her. I didn't, and only kept my gaze fixated on my current game.

"Mattie" She demanded eventually, giving in.

"Would you quit with the nicknames?" I snapped in response, finally pulling my gaze away from the game to look at her. She frowned at me, and leaned forwards.

"Matt then, happy?" Her voice had a challenging tone to it, which honestly seemed odd on her. She always seemed so overtly cheerful.

"No" I responded, giving her an equally challenging glare. She sighed again, looking resigned as she leaned back in her seat.

"Look, Matt. I didn't know why you were staying here at first, but stuff spreads in school, and you really need to go talk with Mello" I opened my mouth to argue, but she only held a hand up to my mouth. "Don't, Mello loves you, and you're his best friend. You need to be there for him even if you can't feel the same way alright?" She then removed her hand from my mouth, and waited for me to respond, her expression soft now.

It took me a minute to figure out how to respond, I knew what she was saying, but I didn't want to face it. I didn't want Mello to love me that way, because I couldn't love him. I liked girls, guys on occasion and most certainly not Mello. It just couldn't work, and it could possibly ruin out friendship.

"I can't like him that way though" I replied uncertainly, earning an odd look from Misa. One I definitely couldn't place.

"Look at me"

"What?" I questioned, not understanding what she was getting at.

She waved a hand at her body, "Do you like what you see?"

"Huh? Of course-" I didn't finish, as my eyes went to her body. Her hips, waist, legs, her supple breasts and neck. The silky blond hair, a lighter tone than Mello's own, "Um.." I shifted awkwardly, "What am supposed to say?"

"Just tell me what you think, would you want to touch me?"

What was she getting at now? "I guess, I mean your pretty-"

"How pretty though?" She demanded as she leaned forwards again, giving me an apt view of her chest. I could feel my ears warming up, as well as my stomach churning uncomfortably in reaction.

"You're nice okay? I'm sure lots of other guys would love to get with you" I supplied uneasily, keeping my eyes on hers. At my response she leaned back again, giving me a pointed look.

"See Matt? You must feel something for Mello, or at least, you don't feel anything physical for me as a woman"

"But-"

"I mean look at Light, he prefers L's company over mine" Her voice changed to borderline upset as she brought up the recent break-up. I sighed in relief as she took the questions away from me, I really didn't want to hear it. I didn't like Mello, not like that, I would never.

"L is Light's best friend, of course they want to hang out" I supplied.

"Do you know the last time Light has kissed me?" She almost snapped, causing my to blink in confusion.

"Yea, three days ago when he arrived at school" I told her, dumbfounded, did she not remember? But she only shook her head.

"No, I mean kissed, kissed. I mean the last time it wasn't for public appearances"

"Oh" I knew what she was getting at now, Light didn't like her at all, of course I knew this, but I didn't know it was quite like that.

"Yea" She looked sullen now, as she fiddled with the strap on her bra. "Light never loved me, and Mello loves you-" I didn't want to hear it, I just didn't, but I let her continue this time. "-You shouldn't let that just blow away. Can you do that for me at least?"

At the end of her sentence I lowered my head, avoiding her eyes. "You don't understand" I mumbled, but I wasn't so sure anymore. I didn't know what I thought at this point, didn't know what I felt.

"Fine, maybe I don't, but I said it anyways" She retaliated as a pout formed on her lips, as cute as it apparently looked, I didn't find the pout all that attractive on her. Instead of replying I stood up from my seat and began to make my way out of the room, meanwhile shoving my Psp inside my pocket.

I was just at the doorway, slipping on my shoes when she questioned me. "Where are you going?"

"Just for a walk, I will be back in an hour, give or take" I supplied as I pulled on my vest and gave her a wave, I didn't give her time to respond before I was out the door and walking down the sidewalk. I normally wouldn't have resorted to the outdoors for thinking time, but it was much to crowded in there, at least it felt that way.

I seemed to have had a lot of time to think in the past two days, but it didn't much help. When I first got to Misa's I had cried myself to sleep on the couch, and then I played video games on my Psp for a majority of the next two days.

There was the fact, and fact was that Mello loved me, so much so, and that I couldn't love him back. Or could I? I thought about it as I took a turn down a brightly lit street, but the images I came up with only made me cringe.

And what was Misa getting at back there? If I liked her body? What I had responded with was pretty honest, she had a nice models body. But I didn't particularly want to touch her, but would I rather touch Mello? In any way at all?

I didn't know, I couldn't imagine it, it just felt wrong.

We were practically brothers, everything about it felt wrong, and part of me was afraid that I would lose his friendship if we did anything.

Thats all there was to it, I felt no attraction for him whatsoever. But clearly he did for me, so maybe I could try? I didn't want to mess things up though, I couldn't kiss him just to see if I felt anything, that would mess with his head to much. On that topic, I wasn't even completely sure I liked guys, I had to admit I did like them to a point, and I was very open, but I had never been in a relationship. With a guy or a girl, but maybe...

Thats a stupid idea, isn't it?

After a second of thought I pulled my phone out of my pocket, -Luckily I hadn't forgotten it at Misa's- and turned it on. The time flashed brightly of the screen as '20:34', Half an hour since I had left. I had time, and I could always chicken out of course. I knew there was a small club area just down from Misa's place, I had seen the spot when she picked me up. There would probably be one for teens, where you could get in without an id, and only needed one to order drinks.

It would work, and maybe it would shed some insight on my predicament.

When I found the club district about ten minutes later, I started to doubt my decision. The bright lights, drunken civilians, loud music and general air didn't make it feel like I should be here. It wasn't my style I supposed, but nontheless I headed for one the had some teenagers hanging around outside, not even bothering to look at the name of the place.

I guess I picked the right one, as the bouncer let me in without an id. Though I almost wished he kicked me out, I didn't like it in here. To many people dancing around, chatting, talking, yelling, it was crowded. It smelled of sweat and whatever fruity cocktails they served, which I supposed bars usually were like this, but I couldn't say that I enjoyed it in the slightest.

It really was a stupid decision, coming here. But I was here now, and I wasn't going to leave just yet.

I stood in the doorway for a few moments, trying to get my bearings in here. But what I didn't count on, was being noticed and approached, and I almost started when someone came up to me with a casual greeting.

A guy, about my age, with shaggy black hair and a lip piercing. Decked out in a leather jacket over top a plaid shirt and denim skinny jeans. The leather jacket, I noticed was the exact same one as Mello's, except maybe two sizes bigger, as it was big on this guy.

"Hey" I tried not to show my discomfort as I responded, but I was sure he still noticed.

"You look a little out of place here, are you looking for somebody?" He spoke above the music, but I still had to strain to hear him, maybe that was my nervousness taking over though.

"No, I'm not" I supplied, earning a confusing chuckle from him.

"I'm just gonna go ahead and say it, you've never been to a bar before have you?"

I shook my head in response, and much to my surprise the man swung his arm around my shoulder, his face was really close when he spoke again, though surprisingly he didn't have bad breath, kind of just minty actually. "Thats fine, how about I get you a drink and show you the ropes?"

"Alright, sure" I agreed. I didn't know bars had 'ropes', per se, But I complied, figuring if I didn't, I might as well go sit in a corner and that didn't seem the most exciting, or productive at that.

Besides, I had a plan, a stupid one but it was still a plan. if it worked, I mean, how many guys here could be gay? Actually this guy looks kind of gay now that I think about it..

He grinned as he held out his hand, "Great, you can just call me Shiori, if thats alright"

I smiled sheepishly in response and accepted the gesture, "Matt"

"Oh yea, so are you a tourist or what?" He asked as he began to lead us through the crowds.

"No, I moved here about a month ago, to stay" I supplied, earning a nod from him as we came up to a table with four other guys. He pulled a chair out for me, before flopping down in his own.

"Hey, who's this?"An older Japanese man with short hair questioned as I took the offered seat, while the other three looked, well..drunk and having there own conversations, with only a few glances in my direction.

"found him over by the door, figured he could use some company" Shiori chuckled, "His names Matt, Matt this is Akiharu, Ishi, Goru, and Yamahida" He introduced.

I nodded, casting a smile in their direction, "Nice to meet you"

"Of course red, its a pleasure" Akiharu drawled the greeting, earning a raised eyebrow from me.

"Red?"

"Yea, because of your hair, you don't mind do you?" He chuckled as he received a drink from the waitress and took a sip. It looked a lot like the sake that Mello had sneaked us for my birthday...

Maybe that wasn't a great thought.

"No it's fine" I replied quietly as I shifted in my seat, uncomfortable for more than just one reason.

"Well, Matt, what can I get for you?" Shiori asked me, pointing to the front of the bar.

"Um, I probably shouldn't" I told him uncertainly, earning an expression full of something akin to hilarity.

"Nonsense, you came here, I'm getting you a drink" With that he waved for a waitress, and barely had to wait a few minutes before she came over, dressed in a dark blue apron with her hair tied back.

"What can I get for you?"

"One round of whiskey shots, straight up" He told her and on the order she left, meanwhile Akiharu took to starting up a conversation with Shiori, leaving me quite unsure of what to do, I was certainly regretting my choice by the time the waitress came back. I didn't want to get drunk, I didn't want to be here, this was stupid and I probably wasn't going to meet anyone that I could well...kiss..

"Alright" Shiori drew out as he received the drinks and handed me a shot glass, "Here you go, drink up"

I took the glass but only stared at it uncertainly, I really didn't want to do this, and I was wishing the waitress noticed my young age.

"Well go on, you only live once"

Shrugging inwardly, and unsure at the words, I stiffly tipped up the small glass and swallowed, immediately feeling an only remotely familiar burning in my stomach. I coughed harshly, feeling the strong drink burning in my nose. Though no sooner than I did that were shiori and Akiharu cheering, one of them rubbing my back as I tried to regain my composure.

I didn't quite know how I ended up pressed against the back of a Nissan Micra, with Shiori's lips pressed up against mine and his hands on my hips. But I knew it was the fault of a few to many pressured drinks. I think I had been there for quite awhile before common sense kicked in though, and even as I pushed Shiori away, parts my body certainly said I shouldn't have done that.

"Wha-?" Was his incoherent question as his lips disconnected from mine and he stumbled slightly on his feet, now only a few steps away from me.

I shook my head in response, trying to regain my composure, which seemed to be an impossible task right now. "Can't" I huffed as he just gave me a confused look, "I'm with somebody" it came out before I even really thought about it, and even then it was only a brief moment that I asked myself why. My mind was in to much of a jumble to think properly.

"Well, what're you going to do about that?" He pointed at my jeans, causing my face to flush more than it had already been. I shook my head, not really answering him. He simply huffed and walked over beside me, leaning against the trunk just as I was.

I kept my eyes on the ground as he stood there, all the energy in my body seemed to have just dissipated, and I felt like sinking to the floor. I could barely think, but I knew how bad this was. If anything bad for my consciousness. It wasn't my goal at all to get drunk..

I glanced up when I heard him shuffling around in his pockets, to be met with a cigarette mere inches from my face. Without thinking, I nodded and took the circular stick from his hand, with him lighting it in turn, before I stuck it to my lips and inhaled. Almost immediately I burst out coughing, and I was almost certain that if my thoughts were cloudy before, they were much more now.

As my coughing fit subsided I stared at the smoldering stick disdainfully, my eyebrows furrowed. "This stuff is disgusting" I muttered, earning a disjointed chuckle from Shiori.

"They are, but it helped with your little problem didn't it?"

"Oh" I sounded stupidly, nodding my head in acknowledgement.

"So I guess if you don't want to continue, you should get a taxi or something" He muttered as he stood up straight, I looked up at him in confusion for a few moments, before I pieced together what he said. And when I did, a frown took over my face immediately.

"I guess I have to walk, I don't have any money on me"

"Uhg, here" I watched as he shuffled around in his pockets for a second, before pulling out a few paper bills "This should work"

I stared at him for a while, before he sighed and shoved it at my chest "Just take it" at the command I took the bills, and promptly he began to walk away, waving at me from behind. "See ya"

"Thank you, I guess" I was still quite confused to as what just happened, but I figured that that was the best response, other than that, I really did need to get home, at least I knew that for sure.

Without really thinking about it, and more out of impulse, I took another drag from the cigarette, before I even realized what I had just done and was sent into another coughing fit. cursing, I threw the stick to the ground and stomped it out, before I began to walk away from the building, rather unsteadily.

It took a mere few minutes to hail a taxi, and it was only then that I somehow realized what the bar actually was.

"Seriously?" I muttered in drunken disbelief, before shaking my head and getting inside the taxi that had pulled up beside me. Taking one last look at the colorful building before I closed the door, my thoughts still a mess between the Alcohol, and exhaustion.

Mello's Pov:

I tried to zone out the teachers endless babble as I stared at my pencil, I didn't even went to hear her, let alone listen and take notes. Though I had to pretend I was taking notes, because if she told me to pay attention there was a good chance that I would punch her.

Three days, three days that Matt hadn't even bothered calling, coming to school or anything of the like. I had to admit, the closest description to my behavior was depressed, until this morning when I woke up just genuinely angry.

Angry at myself, I couldn't believe I let myself tell him that, possibly destroying any friendship we might have ever had. And I was angry at Matt, for eliciting these feelings in the first place and running out, and I was angry at everyone else for trying to tell me its okay. It is not okay, Matt probably hates me, or at the least I made him incredibly uncomfortable with my own damned existence.

Damned is right, I had never felt this much loathing for my very existence until now.

Maybe I should just die, its not like I seem to be worth all that much. I'm the kid who was bounced around orphanages for five years, the kid who went to such lengths to win that he hurt himself. The kid who stopped eating because he wanted to be more fit, and now, apparently the kid who fell in love with his best friend and ruined everything.

I didn't even have parents for gods sake, apparently I killed both of them at birth. Hows that for a reason to not have been born?

I sighed as I tried to get myself away from that train of thought, I was being way more emotional than I should have been, even my eyes were tearing up a little. With a glance towards the clock, I noted that school was out in less than five minutes.

Maybe I could just get up and leave right now? It would save me having to talk with anybody else until I got home.

It didn't much consideration before I made up my mind and stood up from my desk, catching the attention the teacher as I quickly gathered up my books and began to walk out of the classroom.

"Mello, where are you going? Class isn't over yet"

I completely ignored her as I exited the room, leaving behind Light and Near in the classroom along with a few of the other kids that I didn't care to remember. I made my way to my locker quite quickly and placed my books inside, before closing it shut.

I was about to walk away when I looked at Matt's locker, right beside mine.

Something felt wrong about just leaving, or more, I felt the need to vent, even in a subtle way. So I pulled out a set of our house keys, and promptly moved up against the metal, and in the top corner I began scraping out two letters into the paint.

Eventually they would just repaint the spot, but it didn't matter that much. Heck, it would probably be better if they painted it over before Matt comes back. Granted he comes back of course, but I was kidding myself saying that he wouldn't. The program we were on together made it so that we would be in Japan for at least while, though why specifically Japan was a mystery to me. That was just how it was.

I took a step back to look at my miniature artwork, before suddenly feeling silly, though almost a little relieved. I let out a sigh and spun around on my heel. I had to leave right now if I wanted to avoid everybody else, so at a fast walk I left the building and began the short trek home.

Ten minutes later I arrived at the house, finding the door to be unlocked, immediately I was curious. Nobody should have been home right now, and I didn't think that Sachiko had a day off from her book club. Unless of course...

Feeling my stomach drop I opened the door, stepped inside and kicked off my shoes. I didn't bother with the slippers, I usually didn't much to the annoyance of everybody else in the house. I dropped my bag on the floor, along with my jacket and hurried upstairs. My feet felt like they were carrying me too fast and too slow at the same time, but nontheless I eventually found myself pulling open my bedroom door.

Immediately my blue eyes met green, and I froze, my stomach felt like ten pounds of rocks as my eyes widened. There, sitting in front of my bed and wrapped in blankets with a Dreamcast controller in hand, was a certain redhead. A disheveled redhead, with bags under his eyes, pale skin, messy red hair and dirty clothes.


	7. If its to soon, we'll make a mistake

Disclaimer: I don't own Deathnote, if I did the second opening theme song would have been different...Did anybody even like that?

Mello's Pov:

"Hey" He shifted awkwardly, while I didn't respond and instead just stared at him. My left hand was gripping the door handle, a clear sign of the emotions going through me right then, as I was holding it like it was stopping me from hitting something.

It was.

Seconds passed slowly, me not wanting to say anything and him almost looking regretful. He should, he just left, he just left me to think he hates me, and then he came back. Maybe he even does truly hate me, I didn't know what was going through those once so easily readable green eyes.

"Are you uh, going to say anything Mells?" He mumbled, setting down the controller and looking up at me. The air was tense, I hardly wanted to deal with this, I was just angry, and I couldn't control the feeling in the least. I was angry at Matt, more than I had ever been in my life, and I was angry because he just left me when I needed him, and he knew it.

when I didn't respond, and only glared at him he seemed to shrink in on himself, and with anybody else I would have smirked. He should be scared, I was so mad at him, but then, I wanted everything to be back to normal, for my best friend to be laughing with me as we played his video games.

"Mells?" He questioned again, looking concerned as his shoulders stayed tense.

"No"

"What?" He blinked in confusion.

I let go of my grip on the door handle as I walked into the room, my hands balled into fists as I refrained from my emotions.

"No Matt, you just left, you left and didn't come back for three fucking days. Without contacting us at all" I grit out, knowing that he knew exactly what I was talking about.

He stared at me, his expression filled with an array of emotions, and his eyes watering slightly, though he seemed to be refusing to cry.

"I'm sorry Mells, I didn't mean it, any-"

"Shut up" I snapped coldly, causing him to close he mouth immediately. I was trying to keep my composure as I stood over him, but it wasn't easy. I wanted to hug him for coming back, I wanted to run away and never look at his face again, and I wanted to beat him up for everything. And below all of that even, I wanted to hit myself, for being so damn stupid.

The facts kept running through my head, why I should even be so mad at him, but I just couldn't think. I just knew I was pissed, and that I felt like ripping apart this room, that was it.

"Mello?" His voice was shaking slightly, from him holding back his tears, I knew, because my anger could never faze him, no matter what. "I'm sorry"

"What are you saying sorry for then, huh?" I was choking up slightly "For ditching me when you obviously knew I needed my friend? For letting me think that you hate me? For letting me worry so much that you were sleeping on the streets? For.." I didn't want to say the next words so I stopped, though Matt understood. I loved that about him, he always seemed to understand...to bad he didn't three nights ago.

"I'm sorry, I can't say much. I was shocked, and then I felt embarrassed for leaving-"

"Matt" I snapped again, shutting him up promptly "You know what your saying is irrelevant, its not gonna help a damn thing. You can't feel that way about me, and I don't fucking care if your disgusted, I'm just fucking pissed at you"

"I-" He stopped, shuffling in his blankets until he stood up, facing me levely. "I can't, your right about me not caring for you like that, I don't think I can" His voice sounded painfully uncertain, and it hurt so much, "But I'm not disgusted, and I'm sorry I ran off, I know what I did was irrational"

I stared at him, processing what he just said, but I knew this was ruining things here. I wasn't going to get over this and...

I sighed, loosening up a little. At least he wasn't angry at me, he just overreacted, classic Matt...classic me, for overreacting as well.

"Mells?" He questioned after a second, clearly wondering what was going through my head right now.

A short pause after my nickname, and I spoke again. "Can we just forget this?" I suggested, earning a small smile from Matt, I didn't see any reason for a smile, I felt terrible.

"Yea" He spoke softly, in a tone of voice that I loved and hated at the same time, before moving in for a tentative hug, though I stopped it with a hand to his chest. His green eyes clouded with confusion, and I shook my head.

"Just leave me alone" I muttered, before turning around and walking out of the room, Matt didn't respond, just stared at my back as I walked out of the area and shut the door in the hallway.

I didn't want to talk to him, I just wanted to walk away and sink into a place where I didn't need to think about this. These feelings wouldn't go away, they would be there for a long time, and I just screwed myself over, because I told him to just forget this, but I didn't think I could forget.

Matt's Pov:

School sucks, mainly when you spend three days away from your studies, and have to catch up on your work while most everyone else is out. But the fact that me and Mello hadn't seemed to resolve anything made it worse, because I couldn't, for all my genius, seem to focus. Mello etched our initials on my locker too, which made me feel even more guilty for what I put him through. I didn't even know why he did that, was it for superficial reasons, or for his own sanity?

I came back two days ago, and when he said to just forget it I thought everything was going to be forgiven. But of course it wasn't going to be like that, because he has hardly spoken to me, and I was no better. We avoided each other at school, and at home we didn't talk.

L and Light's glances didn't help either, they knew we were being idiots, I knew it, but it didn't help. Mello was pushing me away, and I was upset, so I pushed him away in return. Even though I wanted to just hug him and lay in bed next to him at night.

Today was a familiar scene, with me laying on my stomach on my bed trying to do homework, and Mello leaned up against his bed frame across the room doing his own. Textbooks littered his floor, while mine where neatly snacked around me. Mostly because I took my work a lot more lightly than him.

I was frustrated, just because he told me and I overreacted, we were sent into what seemed to be a permanent awkwardness.

My gaze was on Mello instead of my textbooks for a long moment, as I felt more content to just observe him. Doing my homework was stressing me out, watching Mello calmed me. Even if we weren't on exactly friendly terms right now.

At the moment he was focused on a psychology book, intently reading it as he copied down notes on a notebook that rested beside him. His hair was falling in his face, surely blurring his vision, but he didn't bother to remove it. He was dressed in his usual attire, leather skinny jeans and a black sweater that hugged his frame tightly. I never understood how he found that comfortable, even if I had a skinny frame like him I would feel too revealed. He looked good in it though, he didn't have to force the style on himself, it was just natural.

I, on the other hand had a hard time with any styles. I wore a striped shirt, jeans, boots and a vest. I liked it, though if you asked me, it was bland, unlike Mello's leather. I guess I had my goggles though, they made the outfit unique.

The point was, that Mello was pretty and I was bland. He had those pure ice blue eyes and flaxen blond hair, while I had messy off red hair and brown-green eyes. He had the heart shaped face, I had the round one...

Suddenly I noticed blue eyes turned to me, and I didn't even notice that our gazes were locked for a long moment until he snapped at me, bringing me out of my inward ramblings.

"What do you want?" I flinched back at his harsh tone, but only turned my head back to my books.

"Nothing" I mumbled under my breath, and pointedly ignored him when he gave out a huff and stood up, before proceeding to walk out of the room.

Mello's Pov:

What the hell was that?

He was just staring at me, for almost a good twenty minutes and I couldn't focus. I was writing down things in my notebook, but I was just copying, I couldn't focus on anything that I was putting down. Then when I looked up to snap at him, I just stopped.

He looked to distant, like he was staring at me, but staring at nothing at the same time. I don't think he even noticed until I snapped at him, and I hardly did either when I myself snapped out of it.

Damn him, that was so typical of me. Staring into his eyes like that, they are just so pretty, I love staring at them. But not like that, I like to be in control, that was nowhere near control. I didn't even know how long that was, I just knew that it was awhile, and neither of us noticed.

Until I did, maybe I should have just stayed quiet...

I shook my head, ridding myself of those thoughts. I was being stupid, I couldn't indulge myself like that again, or think about it. Matt was a friend, and he didn't like me that way, so I needed to just forget it, as hard as that is.

It is really hard, because I love him.

I didn't really notice that I was downstairs until I spotted Light, I think it processed in the back of my head somewhere, but not enough for me to acknowledge it. Nontheless I was now standing awkwardly at the foot of the stairs, facing the boot room where L and Light were putting on their jackets.

I didn't really want to see them, I kinda wanted to sneak back up the stairs, but that would be wimping out. So I just stood there, rather dumbly until Light noticed me, raising his honey colored eyes to where I was standing.

"Hello Mello" He greeted, catching L's attention at the same time as he raised his gaze to me and nodded in acknowledgement.

"Hi" I mumbled, but didn't make to move, Light seemed to take this as me silently asking where they were going, which was only half true.

"Me and L are meeting up with Misa and Taki, would you like to come?" He questioned, but I most certainly didn't. I shook my head.

"No, don't feel like it" I told them as I finally found myself walking down the hall towards the living room, but I was stopped when L spoke.

"Are you sure Mello?"

I turned my head to look over my shoulder, "Yea" and with that I continued into the living room, before flopping down on the couch and turning on the tv. As I heard the front door shut I briefly wondered if maybe I should have gone, but in the end I decided I did not. Misa was annoying, Takada was too...Takada, and I would probably just end up sitting outside being gloomy.

Light's Pov:

I almost find it funny how, even when Matt and Mello were fighting, they always seemed to stay close. Last night before me and L went to Ginza with Maki and Misa, they were both up in their room studying for over three hours. And even now they are both sitting on the living room couch, Mello reading and Matt playing games on his Psp. Though both of them stayed on opposite ends, leaving an apt amount of space between them as they leaned against the armrests.

It was clear how upset they were at each other, even if L hadn't told me about the situation before, I would have been able to tell. They definitely didn't bother hiding it.

I had to say, it was quite coincidental though. That they would be going through this, when I am at the same time. Just for me I wouldn't dare let anything happen. L was a good friend, and I wasn't going to make it anything more, even if he somehow wanted to.

I knew L had a hunch, that one day that I had when I wasn't feeling to great he seemed to have figured it out. But he still didn't know for sure, and that was good. It should stay that way, not because I didn't want the relationship, I did, but I didn't want everything it came with.

people like to talk, they like their opinions, and I prefer to keep their opinions about me pleasant.

I was being smart about this, and I wasn't letting anyone know. I had felt this way for four years and hid it, and I would continue doing just that.

"Is something the matter Light?"

I turned my head from Matt and Mello to look at L inquiringly, "Yes, why?"

"You've been staring at those two for quite some time" He supplied as he took a slurp from his cup of coffee.

'Not coffee, sludge' I corrected mentally, as I responded, "I'm fine, just thinking about them" I offered, earning a knowing look from L, he seemed to have figured I was telling the truth.

"They are quite the case, aren't they" It came out as more of a statement then a question of course. That was just L, he never asked questions that he didn't already know the answers to.

"Yea, I was just thinking, even though they are fighting they seem to always hang around each other"

This earned a nod from L, "Indeed, me and Beyond used to be like that to a point"

I nodded in acknowledgement. I had almost forgotten that L and Beyond used to be best friends, it was a short time, I remember L telling me. When they were little they just stuck to each other, as they were so alike mentally, but when they turned eleven they drifted apart. It was an odd picture, when they first came here Beyond always got mad at L, in fact he couldn't stand him, and even now they pick on each other quite often, that or they just don't pay each other any mind. Sometimes they get along together though, more so now then before.

"Matt" Mello's snap brought both I and L's attention the the living groom, where the blond was now glaring at Matt, as the younger teen looked embarrassed.

"Sorry, there's not much room on the couch" Matt mumbled, pulling himself into a ball on the cushion. "You didn't need to shout though" He said as he glanced over at L and I, "All I did was touch you" he added, obviously informing us.

"Whatever" Mello then huffed, as he sat up and went back to his book. Matt only shook his head lightly, clearly upset as he to went back to his game.

L and I stayed silent for a moment, before I spoke up, looking back at him "Should we talk to them?" I asked him, already forming an idea in my head. Nobody was really home today, besides Near, so if they got into a fight it wouldn't disrupt everybody.

L paused, thinking for a few seconds before he nodded and stood up. "Separately though" He told me as we walked the few steps into the living room. Mello and Matt both looked up as we came up to the couch, though Mello more grumpily glared up at us from behind his book cover.

"Mello, can I talk to you?" L asked, placing a hand on Mello's book and pushing it down in his grasp. Mello looked like he was going to refuse, but obviously thought better of it when he caught L's stern expression.

"Fine" He huffed, setting his book down and standing to follow L upstairs. I waited untill they were both out of sight before I turned to Matt and made my way around the couch, sitting down where Mello just was. Matt continued playing his game, though when I cleared my throat he seemed to have gotten the hint and put it down, looking at me inquiringly.

"Yea?"

I sighed "You and Mello need to fix things"

At that he huffed, turning his gaze away from me. "I know" It was spoken softly, unlike Mello's snarky tone. I didn't know quite what to say, I wasn't used to giving people I cared for advice. Polite company, other students, people that I wasn't responsible for, so I just went for it. Straight to the point.

"Do you like him?"

He stiffened at that, and I knew he was unsure about his feelings for Mello. Or maybe at the least, he doesn't want to ruin their friendship for a relationship. He swallowed thickly, before looking down at his lap. We stayed quiet for a moment, until Matt decided to speak up.

"I guess I don't know, I just..." He paused, obviously thinking hard, "How do you know if you really do like someone that way?" he then asked.

The question was difficult to answer, and the answer was different all the time for me, but I could give him my best opinion. "I think" I paused, collecting my thoughts and deciding the best way to word it, "That at the least, if you don't know that nothings there, there is more than something"

"Hmm" He sounded, looking no more sure of himself, I thought he was just going to stay silent, and I was going to have to pry some more, but then he spoke up again. "I think I like Mello, romantically" He took a deep breath, probably uneasy with saying it aloud, "But I don't want to make a mistake...If I actually don't"

"Then you two need to talk, calmly, no storming out on each other" Matt did have his priorities, that was a sure thing, and this was the best I could do for him, he needed to do the rest.

He nodded, "thanks I guess"

"You're welcome" I told him, before looking up towards the stairs "Mello will probably be down in awhile depending on what L can say, talk then alright?"

Matt nodded and picked up his game again, I took that as a sign to leave, and stood up from the couch to go upstairs. L and I could stay up there while they talk, granted, if they do.

Matt's Pov:

My mind was racing after Light left. What he said only reinforced what I had been thinking for most of today, that there is something that I do feel for Mello. I was just scared of what would happen, and if I was wrong. But essentially Light was right, I needed to talk to Mello.

So I waited, my guts churning terribly as I anticipated what I would tell him, I didn't even know what I would say. I knew what was in my head, but it most certainly wouldn't come out the same. Hopefully it would still work out though.

It was only a few minutes before Mello came back downstairs, though my back was turned to him as he stood still in the hallway. I didn't really know what I was doing, maybe this wasn't such a good idea. But after a few seconds, I swallowed nervously and turned my head to look at him.

Subdued was the best description of how he looked right then, along with solemn, whatever L had talked to him about made some impact on him at least.

"Can I come in?" He asked, surprising me a little bit, I didn't expect him to speak up first.

"Of course" I offered, and at that he made his way over to me and sat down in his previous seat. A few seconds passed in silence, as we just stared anywhere but at each other. It was Mello who spoke first once again.

"I think I should tell you what's going through my head"

I nodded, and at that he took a deep breath. "Okay, so" He sounded nervous, so much unlike Mello "I really like you, a little bit since before we arrived here is when I started to really realize it, and it just escalated from there"

I nodded, "I kinda gathered"

"Yea" He agreed, then looked up at me while he continued, "So I don't really know what to do, it just feels terrible, you can't feel that way about me, and I can't be just a friend around you for the rest of my life"

At those words I smiled a little, though it dropped just as soon as it appeared. Mello wants to be friends for the rest of our lives, but he can't be friends when he feels this way. It is such a mess. Can I reciprocate these feelings though? Because that would fix everything if I could.

"Mello" I started, making sure his attention was on me completely as I spoke. "I do have some feeling's for you, I think" I offered, and his expression turned confused.

"You think?"

I nodded, "But I'm not sure, I don't want it to ruin our friendship if I'm wrong, and honestly...I think I might be" I cringed as I said that, and Mello scowled. It wasn't the truth, I realized that as the words came out, but I couldn't take them back, so I stayed quiet, staring at my lap now.

"I don't understand" He said eventually, and I shrugged tensely.

"Me neither"

"What makes you think that you don't have any feelings for me at all?" He then demanded, and I could easily tell from his voice, that he was getting frustrated.

"I-" I had dug myself into a hole, I didn't have a reason, there was doubt, but that wasn't one and I just lied to him. Over the last two days I had thought about me and Mello, and I realized yesterday that I do, if only slightly. Technically I could do it, I could be with Mello, once I thought about it in a different light than I was, it seemed inviting actually. But how do I tell him that? Along with the fact that I don't know, and I already said that I don't...

"What Matt? Tell me" His gaze was begging almost, he really wanted me to say something that would make everything better. But I froze up, I didn't know what to say, everything was still so hazy for me.

After I stayed completely quiet for a while longer he put his arms on my shoulders, causing me to raise my head. He looked absolutely desperate, and I was sure I did to. I wanted to tell him I could do it, that I wanted to. but that wasn't what came out of my mouth.

"I can't"

I immediately regretted the words, as, as soon as I said them Mello withdrew his hands. From this close I could see his eyes watering, but I couldn't read the rest of his expression before he roughly pushed himself away from me and rushed upstairs. I could guess it anyways, disappointment, confusion, anger, hopelessness, I was feeling similar emotions as I sat there and listened to his footsteps, followed by the loud slam of our bedroom door.

I really fucked up. Why did I say that?

L's Pov:

As I had expected, Light was in our bedroom when I opened our door. Him probably having not to had to talk to Matt near as much, Matt was calmer when it came to emotions, whereas Mello had a very difficult time. As portrayed in his bedroom a few moments ago.

"Hey" He greeted me without removing his gaze from his laptop, though he did take his hands away from the keyboard.

"How did it go with Matt?" I asked him as I made my way to our shared desk and computer, it seemed Light had left it for me, probably knowing I had a few things to do on it.

"Fine, he was quite compliant with what I told him" He said as he typed something into his computer, before he shut the lid and sat up, "Calmer" he added, earning a nod from me as I took a seat at the desk, facing him.

"He is" I agreed, "Mello is not" I joked.

"Yea, hey can you pass me those books?" He asked, pointing behind me, I nodded and spun the chair, grabbing the books before idly spinning back and handing them to him.

"Thanks" He told me, before he set about going through them for whatever information he needed.

"You're welcome" I replied, before I myself went back to the computer and started it up. "Hey Light?" I questioned after a few seconds, though I didn't look back at him. I was fairly certain that he had feelings for me, and once again I was just prying. And I would do so until he told me.

"Yea?"

"What do you think of Mello's feelings for Matt?"

"What do you mean?" He asked, confusion evident in his tone.

I spun in my chair to face him again, meeting his honey amber eyes. I liked his eyes, they were quite unusual, and certainly beautiful. "I mean, do you think that it's serious?"

Light paused, looking thoughtful for a moment. "I guess, I mean, it probably is serious. Those two have been friends since childhood from my understanding" He offered, "Why?"

"No reason, I was just curious to hear your thoughts" With that explanation I spun back around to the computer, now booted up, and clicked into an English paper that I had to finish before Monday.

"Alright then" He replied, though he didn't sound like he believed me.

I dismissed him as I started on the assignment, though I wasn't focusing to much, I was wondering about Light. I knew him, and he knew I knew him, so naturally I was certain in my deductions. But I still didn't know why I wanted to know so badly, surely it was just my curious nature, my want to know everything around me, but..

What would I do when he tells me the truth? I didn't know, I still didn't, even if I have had plenty of time to think about it, it was no less confusing. To a point, I understood where Matt was coming from, though it seemed like he was put into the situation to quickly. I would have to be careful, there was a chance I would end up like that if I wasn't careful.

"Light?" I was still going through with it, even though I was terrifyingly uncertain about it.

"What now?"

"Do you have feelings for me?"

I heard a pause and then the closing of a book, "L"

Sighing lightly, I turned around in my chair to be met with Light's irritated gaze.

"Yes?"

"Why are you asking me that again?"

"I was simply curious-" I started, only to be cut of by Light's frustrated voice.

"No L, now stop asking me that question, I don't know why your doing it, but stop" He snapped, while he continued glaring at me, eyes narrowed and lips pursed.

I opened my mouth, about to respond, but then the sound of footsteps and a door slamming distracted me, as both I and Light turned to look in the direction of the noise. We paused for a moment to listen, and then heard the sound of footsteps again. Faintly Matt's voice could be heard, along with Mello's even fainter one, but it was almost inaudible.

"They seemed to have gotten into another fight" I noted, earning a nod from Light.

"Should we go check on them?"

I shook my head, "Probably not-" Though I didn't say anymore when I could hear Matt's footsteps come up to our door, followed by a knock.

"Guys?"

"Come in" Light said, and on the signal Matt opened the door.

"Mello locked himself in his room, I..." He paused, taking a deep breath to regain his composure, "I don't think he's going to come out for awhile"


	8. If it feels right, it probably is

Disclaimer: I do not own Deathnote, if I did I wouldn't be writing this fanfiction, because it would be an original fiction technically...y'know, because I would be the original author..T_T

Near's Pov:

I watched Matt from my place at my desk, placing half of my attention of the teacher as I did so. At the moment it appeared that he had fallen asleep with his head resting on his arms, no doubt emotionally exhausted. The shirt he was wearing was the same one as two days ago, and his hair was, to put it blatantly; a mess.

Mello had stuffed himself in his room for a full 47 hours by now, and I had to listen to him throwing things in an angry fit. Beyond wasn't home for the weekend, so he didn't have to listen to it of course.

But, I just didn't understand it. From what I know, Mello has a bit more than a crush on Matt, and Matt can't reciprocate those feelings. But locking himself in their room didn't seem smart at all, or responsible at that. A simple talk and everything should be fine shouldn't it? And I didn't know why it was such a big deal, Mello's feelings... I didn't see why it was such an endeavor.

I didn't understand it, I supposed it was because I had never felt those feelings before, but..stressing yourself over love?

It was a concept I couldn't grasp, and what if a few years down the line everything is ruined? Then love is just a waist of time.

"Near" I felt a pen poke into my shoulder, and turned my head to look at Linda. She had been tagging along with me ever since that art class, I didn't know why, I wasn't that great of company, but I didn't necessarily mind her company so I didn't say anything. I had even begun to trust her a little.

I raised a hand to curl a piece of my hair, while looking at her inquiringly. "We are not supposed to speak in class Linda-Chan" I noted, earning a light and joking scowl.

"No one will notice, and I was wondering if you wanted to eat lunch outside today"

I stared at her blankly, "That's not allowed". Unless she wanted to break the rules, but I wasn't to keen on that. Though, in essence I didn't care all 'that' much, it wouldn't harm much if I where to get in trouble, with my grades and all.

She frowned, "I know that, I'm not a complete idiot Near, but it would be fun" her lips formed a pout, she seemed to do that a lot though so I didn't really acknowledge it.

I thought about it for a moment, before shrugging and turning back to my paper. "Alright" I replied simply, and heard her cheerful 'great!' as she too went back to her notebook. I still didn't particularly understand other people's emotions, what was so special about sneaking out? it wasn't that exciting in my opinion.

We snuck out to the middle-school playground at lunchtime, and the whole time Linda seemed really nervous. I was curious about it, though I put it too the fact that we were sneaking out as the reason, and proceeded to eat my lunch in silence by my seat on the platform.

It was certainly strange being out here with nobody around, I had to admit, and it did feel different. But I wouldn't go out of my way to do it again, once was fine, I've seen it and now its boring.

A few minutes of silence passed, and I started to wonder what was really troubling Linda, she was usually a chatter box during lunch time, and she hadn't said a word since we got out here. I started to run the reasons for her silence through my head, but came up with nothing, and eventually just asked.

"What's wrong Linda?"

She raised her head from her food, and her face tinted pink. I was confused, and it angered me slightly that I couldn't figure this out. A few lessons in basic human emotions were in order, that was for sure.

"Uh, nothing Near" She smiled at me, but I knew that she was lying.

"Its not nothing, you're being unusually silent" I told her pointedly and put down my box on the playground's platform. Her face flushed even more and she lowered her head, biting her lip, I started to feel if only a little concerned. Maybe something happened? Or she doesn't want to be my friend? That wouldn't bother me much, I'm usually alone anyways. Is she in trouble? She's blushing and being silent, what does that mean? And she asked me out here, possibly to tell me something..

Asked me out...oh, but that couldn't be right though, could it?

My eyes widened slightly, but I only only lowered my head a little to look at Linda in the eyes, hiding the surprise and slight unease rising in my chest. I wasn't so sure about this, I wasn't used to it.

"Linda?"

She raised her head to look at me again, and bit her lip. "You see, I was wondering.."

Her face was bright red by now, and that confirmed it. I let her continue, but I already knew my answer, I just wasn't interested. She was barely a friend to me, and definitely not a romantic interest.

"Would you..I really like you Near, so would you go out with me?" She rushed out the words, and promptly looked down at her lunch box again, waiting for my answer.

"I apologize Linda-Chan, but I don't like you in that way"

She stayed silent, and my mind drifted to how I still didn't understand these things. She seemed upset, Why? I didn't know, just like with Matt and Mello, it seemed like such a big thing to them. Maybe there is something wrong with me? I should really look into these things some time...

"Well.." She trailed off, "I guess, well, I didn't expect you to say no" She sighed, and stood up, while I stared at her in confusion, why is she leaving?

"Linda-Chan?"

"I should go.." She mumbled, earning and prompt 'oh' from me. She smiled sweetly and looked up finally, "I'm sorry, I should have known you wouldn't like me, you probably like someone else" She seemed to regain her composure a little, but she was clearly put down.

"I don't, and it is fine"

She nodded, and with one last smile turned and shuffled across the playground. I watched her go, not really feeling bad but..curious, and confused.

Beyond's Pov:

Near looked..odd after lunch, not his usual indifferent, but instead more purposeful. He had a few books with him and was heading off to the library, obviously skipping English class. It was rather curious, but I didn't bother questioning him. Instead I took his lead, and skipped class to sit down by my locker and draw.

I ignored the few odd looks I got from the few teenagers in the hall, and instead kept on my portrait of Naomi that I was working on. Soon, I was almost done, and only had a bit left to do on the eyes, when the bell rang for the classes to end. I ignored most everyone as the students rushed around me, probably by now used to a small portion of my habits as I didn't get a single second look. It wasn't the first time that I had done this; skip class and do something besides study, that is.

I intended to find Naomi when I was done the picture, and maybe show it to her. It was by far the best that I had done by now. Snowflakes fell in the background, and her cheeks shone with a rosy red, her hair was blowing lightly in the wind. Her eyes shone in the picture, bright and intelligent, just like her. I was quite proud of it, and maybe I could ask her out...she couldn't say no right?

Its what girls like right? For a guy to draw a picture of them, its sweet to them, romantic.

"Hey Kaito!"

I snapped to attention at the voice, recognizing Naomi's tone immediately, and my eyes promptly searched the crowd. Finally finding her boots by one of the classroom's doorways, I couldn't see very well from my place on the floor, and with so many students in the hall, but I stayed seated not wanting to bring attention to myself. Instead I strained to hear what was being said through the sounds of all the other students.

"Yea? whats up Naomi-chan?"

She mumbled something that I couldn't hear, before she spoke again, causing me to grit my teeth. "I was wondering if you would like to go out sometime?"

What? No, nonono, no, surely she isn't asking him out? Whoever he is, I only vaguely recognized the name. I tried to keep myself stilled on the floor, but I desperately wanted to jump up from my seat to see who it was.

"Um...I'm sorry Naomi, it's not that I don't like you, but I'm interested in somebody else"

I sighed promptly, relaxing significantly. She had gone out with other guys in the past, and I can say, that I just didn't like it. And I was only now seriously considering asking her out, if she started something with someone else...that just wouldn't be fun.

I tuned out of the conversation and packed away my notebook, before standing and looking over to Naomi. She nodded at the guy, who I now recognized as one of the tennis players on L and Light's team. He was attractive, I had to admit, but I didn't see what Naomi would see in him thats not superfluous.

Naomi caught my eye, giving me a friendly smile before walking off with a few friends. Meanwhile the other guy went over to his locker, which was only a little ways from mine. I ignored him, and made to catch up with Naomi before her next class; Government Studies.

I didn't know what I was doing really, I usually only spoke to her in band, so she didn't know me all that personally. And the chance that she would agree to be late for class for me was..low, but I had to try. If she got together with anybody, I wouldn't be able to handle it again.

"Naomi" I spoke up, catching her attention as she paused to look at me, giving at nod to her friends for them to continue on to class.

"Yea? Is something up?" She questioned, looking confused as I usually wouldn't search her out outside of the band. If anything, she probably thinks that that is what I want to talk to her about. I was nervous now, more than Nervous.

"I was wondering if I could talk to you for a second" I nodded to one of the now empty clubrooms, "Alone?"

She raised and eyebrow. "Uh, sure?" she said uncertainly, but followed me as I made my way to the room. She turned to me once we where inside, and took a seat on a table, crossing her legs and resting her hands in her lap. She didn't say anything, just looked at me inquiringly.

"Um.." So I really didn't know how to do this, I was also afraid that she would turn me down. I stood in front of her awkwardly, and at my silence she started to look worried. About what, I didn't know.

"Beyond? Are you trying to ask me out?" she suddenly said, and I froze, my eyes widening a little, I opened my mouth to respond, but I couldn't find any words. She guessed it? I didn't know how to feel about that, disappointed maybe, as she didn't seem excited.

She sighed, making my heart sink, as she looked at me apologetically.

"I'm sorry Beyond, I don't feel that way about you"

"Oh" I looked at the floor, a frown on my face. Well there goes everything...quickly too.

"I'm really sorry Beyond, its nothing wrong with you"

Oh? Is she really interested in that other guy that much then? I would be lying if I said I was okay with that, I really, really like her.

"Maybe ask me some other time okay?" She suggested, and I smiled halfheartedly.

"Yea, okay" I'm not completely disregarded at least, though she is probably just being polite.

I kicked my shoes off when I got home, and quickly rushed up the stairs. Ignoring everyones curious looks as I hurried ahead of them, before flopping down face first on my bed in Near and I's room.

Naomi, Naomi doesn't like me. It hurts, and I like her so much, so, so much. I have liked her for over a year, pawned over her, gotten jealous over her boyfriend's time and time again. And then she doesn't even seem like she is interested in me in the slightest. I was disappointed, slightly angry, and upset.

Whats so wrong with me? Sure I look odd, and I can be eccentric, but its not like I'm any less enjoyable to be around, right? RIGHT?

I let out a long, disappointed sigh, seconds before Near opened the door and stepped inside. He seemed to pause, before shutting the door and shuffling inside silently, setting his bag down promptly. I didn't acknowledge him at all, until he spoke up.

"What is the matter Beyond?"

I honestly didn't mind Near that much, he was blunt and didn't go out of his way to speak to people like others. It was almost like he wasn't even there, but today I wasn't in the mood for anybody, and didn't want to speak to him at all. I only let out a huff in response, and rolled over onto my back, staring despondently at the ceiling.

"Naomi I presume then" He mumbled after a moment, and moved over to his dresser, probably to pull out some of his toys.

"Be quiet" I grumbled, letting out another sigh and sitting upright on my bed. As expected, Near was in fact setting up a card tower, and didn't respond to my command. that was good, but I still felt angry.

Eventually, and without really thinking about it, I began to speak. "She doesn't like me, she likes some other tennis guy" I grumbled, earning no response from Near, so I continued. "And I like her so much, she is pretty, and she is friendly, nice, but she for whatever reason doesn't think we would be a good pair" I furrowed my eyebrows, I usually didn't speak my feelings to others, but it felt good to get it out. I was mad, frustrated, disappointed, and I felt the need to talk about it.

"I have liked her for years, and from what she said she knew it too, or at least suspected, but she wouldn't even hardly give us a chance" What she said earlier about asking some other time, I dismissed, if she didn't want me now why would it change in time? "I don't get it, I'm not unlikable am I?" I questioned halfheartedly, and I didn't notice Near's scowl until he spoke up.

"I do not wish to hear this right now, please refrain from telling me"

I blinked in confusion at him, not expecting the borderline harsh statement form the pale boy. But I stayed quiet, not wanting to get into an argument with him. Now I was curious though, he never has spoken to me like that, and I didn't even say anything particularly irritating. He has so far been the type to take everything in stride and ignore annoyances. I couldn't help but question it after a moment.

"What's wrong Near?"

He paused, and after a moment stood up from his small card tower, much to my confusion, before walking out of the room without a response, Closing the door harshly behind himself. I stared after him, genuinely confused to as what was going on with him. Eventually I sighed and pulled my bag up to me, pulling out my sketchbook and flipping to a new page. I stared at the blank page for a few seconds, before I heard the door click open and looked up to see Near again, him seeming to have calmed down quickly.

Much to my confusion he handed me a jar of jam, and I raised my eyebrows at him. He took this as me asking what he is doing, and explained after a silent pause.

"I am sorry that I snapped at Beyond, this is my apology"

"Oh" Why? I wanted to ask, and I was confused, I had never thought he would even bother apologizing.

"I consider Beyond a reliable acquaintance, so I would not wish for him to dislike me in the case that I ever needed help" He figured out my confusion from my expression anyways, but...reliable acquaintance? Wouldn't it be easier to just say friend?

"Alright, Thank you?" I said as I took the jar, earning a nod from him.

"You're welcome"

"Huh"

Light's Pov:

I stared at L's neck while we walked down the sidewalk, admiring the sliver of pale skin as my mind began to drift.

There were quite a few things going on at the moment, not completely detrimental things, but still eventful. For one, L was catching on to me, as much as I denied it, and as much as he continued to ask me at random intervals. Which was annoying, and I was getting more frustrated at it each time, but I essentially just ignored it, in the hopes that he would eventually decide to leave it.

And then Mello hadn't come out of his room since Saturday, well, technically he did come out each time Matt wasn't around, something that I noticed by the missing chocolates from the cupboard. But aside from that, Matt hadn't seen his face since we made them have that talk. Looking back, I should have realized that it was to soon for them to talk, and that we should have left them to be. But it was done, and now Mello was being a spoiled brat in my opinion.

Then the most recent thing, that was in a long time coming. Beyond asked Naomi out, and since yesterday when he did that, he has been wallowing around in his own self pity. Come to think of it, Near had even been odd since that. Not completely notably, but just odd. Little things he did, his tone of voice, how he walked around; like he was up to something' I couldn't help but think, though I didn't put to much into it.

Things certainly changed since those three got here, not necessarily for the better, but..more exciting, it was a welcome change, though I didn't think that way at first.

Huh. At first it was the worst thing possible for me, now that I think about it, I didn't want to share my room with L in the least, and that caused my slip up in my facade that day. But all was good, I wouldn't ever tell L my feelings, and other things were going to work themselves out rather easily, in my opinion.

"Light-Kun?"

Huh? Oh.

I was so deep in thought that I had trailed way behind L, and now was standing about twenty feet behind him. I picked up my pace and caught up with him, until I was standing beside him. I ignored his curious/concerned look and sheepishly apologized, earning a nod from him.

"Its fine, but are you alright?"

I pursed my lips. Am I? I think I am, hopefully my crush on L will disappear in time. It probably will.

"Yea, I was just thinking" I supplied, giving him a small smile, though I knew he could see right through it, and he knew I knew. He only gave a nod, and continued walking, this time I made sure to keep pace with him though.

A few seconds later he spoke up again, with his head tilted upwards to the sky and I made a vague note to make sure he didn't trip while he wasn't looking.

"I don't understand why you're so apt to keep it a secret"

I sighed at this, knowing exactly where he was going. "L, I don't like you like that, so what if I'm gay? It doesn't mean I'm into you, your like my brother" My voice took on a frustrated lilt near the end, and it was quite genuine.

L gave me a sideways glance, "But you do, like me, I mean" I stopped mid step, shoving my hands into my pockets as I glared at him. L stopped too, turning to look back at me over his shoulder.

"Okay L, lets just say I do like you, why would it matter? You're probably not even straight, we all know your closer to Asexual. So even if I did like you, it wouldn't matter, so stop" I told him, before proceeding to walk ahead of him briskly. I only stopped when he spoke next.

"But what if I am gay, and I specifically Like you? Speaking theoretically of course" He said pointedly, and in slight offense.

The positions are completely reversed now, not just our standing but also the theoretical aspect of it. I don't know why he is doing this, and it did cross my mind briefly that he could like me, after all, why else would he ask that? The thought sent butterfly's to my stomach, but I pushed those feelings away and responded.

"Do you?" I questioned dully. Because if you do...everything is messed up, and I don't know what I will do. I'm not supposed to love you, and your not supposed to love me.

He paused, and I was almost afraid that his response would be yes. But I didn't even know what I wanted, I didn't want him to feel that way about me, but I also wanted him to.

"No, I don't"

My heart sunk at the words, and though I hid it, I was disappointed. "Then there was no point in this conversation was there?" I demanded.

He looked at me evenly, and of course I couldn't tell what he was thinking.

"No, I suppose there was not"

"Exactly" I huffed, before turning on my heel and walking away from him. Exactly, I don't feel anything for you, you don't feel anything for me, and we can't even if we do. I continued in my head. No matter how much proof you have, we don't have feelings for each other, especially not you.

Matt's Pov:

I was studying when I heard a loud bang coming from upstairs, and immediately tuned into what was happening up there. Confusion laced on my features until I heard a shout that was most definitely Mello, and another quieter one from Beyond. I raised an eyebrow as I caught a few of the words.

"Stop being a spoiled brat Mello-"

"I'm not being a- Now get out!" A pause where Beyond probably said something, and then another shout from Mello "No, fuck you! Get out, I'm not going down there!"

"Whats going on?" Sachiko's alarmed voice come up from beside me, and I looked up at her, giving out a sigh and not responding as I put my book on the table. I sat up, an anxious queasy feeling was building up in my stomach at the last few words. Did Beyond actually break into Mello's room?

"Matt! Come here and knock some sense into this little bastard!"

I frowned deeply, and ignored the concerned look on Sachiko's face.

"I'm not a bastard, don't say that! And I am not little dammit!"

Despite the obvious command, I couldn't move, I couldn't face him, as I had messed up big time when he locked himself in there and I didn't know what to say to him. I wanted it to all be better, but what if I just made him angrier at me?

"Matt?"

I looked up at Sachiko, and she had that stern motherly look on her face. Not that I would really know what it looks like, but if anything I think that that's what it would be.

"Go"

I sighed at her command, but complied and stood up. Making my way uneasily up the stairs, where I could hear their voices clearly.

"Go away, I don't want to talk"

Beyond was holding the door open when I got up there, and from what I could tell Mello was standing just inside and trying to shut it. Beyond was effectively holding it open though, and blatantly ignoring Mello's obsessive cursing.

Beyond grinned when he spotted me, and I found it quite typical that he was finding this if only slightly amusing. "Matt, get in here and talk to Mello, if you don't I will hit you"

"And so will I if you come in here! So leave!"

I cringed, I had taken hits from Mello before, and I wasn't too sure about this. But from Beyond's look, and his next words, I gave in.

"Matt, I'm serious, you two are being incredibly idiotic, now get in there and talk"

I nodded, swallowing my nervousness, and knowing what I should do, we couldn't fight anymore, we where being stupid and at this point it was just ridiculous. I hated being away from him, and I desperately needed to see him.

Making up my mind, I briskly walked up to the door, not letting myself have a second thought, and slipped though the opening that Beyond was holding in the door. Though I didn't expect Beyond to let go so soon, and the door ended up smacking me in the nose from Mello still pushing it.

I let out a surprised and pained yelp, my hands immediately going to my nose and my eyes squeezing shut as they began to water.

"Oh my god Matt!" Mello yelped, not a second after he realized what had happened, and his hands were suddenly on me, one on my shoulder and one on my cheek. It took me a second to process what happened, as I was only focusing on the pain pulsating through my nose, but when he spoke again I realized what was happening.

"Matt, move your hands" His fingers were gently pushing my hands away, and I complied, letting my hands fall, but not opening my eyes.

He had a hand on my cheek, and one gently on my nose as he felt to see if it was broken, though I knew it wasn't. Slowly I opened my eyes to look straight into his, and they were filled with so much regret, I felt my throat constrict as I swallowed.

"Its not broken. I'm so sorry, I didn't mean for that to happen" He mumbled, avoiding my eyes guiltily, but I only shook my head, closing my teary eyes before I swiftly pulled him into a hug. Earning a surprised yelp from him, though it was less than a second before he returned the gesture tightly, and as I spoke next we both began to cry.

"I'm so sorry, I really messed up" I piped through tears as I gripped him to me tightly, and I was, I was so sorry for all of this.

"Don't do that Matt, I'm the one who should be apologizing. I'm an idiot" His body was shaking slightly, But he didn't let go, or even loosen his grip. I shook my head fervently in response.

"No, no, no, you were just being honest, I'm just an asshole" By now I was really crying, and so was he, we were both holding it in before I came in here, and now we were letting it all out in each other's arms. "I love you Mello, I do so much, its just a big misunderstanding, I hate being away from you, your like my brother and I love you so much and I'm so-"

"Matt shut up! I love you too, its okay and I know, I know, you can't feel that way and I was being ridiculous.." He trailed off with a sniffle and I felt a knot grow in my stomach. "Its okay, lets just forget this ever happened, and never let it happen again" He finished as he let out a strained breath and buried his head in my neck.

I nodded and did the same as I took a ragged breath, enjoying being this close to him, breathing in his scent with his hair tickling my face, even though it was now damp with my tears. I pulled him tighter to my chest, burying my face even further into his shoulder and taking another breath. I noted how almost tense he was in my grasp, but I ignored it, he was here, and that was all that mattered. His arms holding me close, his breath on my neck, his body warming me...I wanted to be here forever, forever and ever, and I wanted him and...

I didn't need to think about It anymore, I wanted him, but for now, I just needed to hold him close. I needed my best friend to never leave my sight, and eventually I needed more, but for now I would wait here until I could take that leap.

"I love you Mello.." I whimpered.


	9. If there is grounds, then it will happen

disclaimer: I do not own Deathnote, if I did there would be more mentions of Mello and Matt in the anime.

Mello's Pov:

The amount of relief that I felt when I woke up the next morning, and remembered the night before, was unbelievable. That fight..that whole thing reminded me of how important Matt is to me. How much I love him, and I couldn't believe how long we fought like that, let alone how we survived through it. Now..after that, I didn't know how I could have ever wanted something more, if all it was going to do, was that.

But then why was I gazing longingly at Matt's sleeping form in the early morning light?

I guess if I had a sin it would be greed, because I still want him, and I'm still more than platonically in love with him, even after that. But I wouldn't make a move, the next move would be his, if there is one, because I wouldn't destroy things again, no way.

I blushed as I thought about holding him, kissing him, and promptly rolled off the bed, landing my feet on the floor soundlessly and rubbing my eyes with my hand.

Matt..I love you, and you love me too. But is it more than platonically? You seemed to have made it clear that you don't, so I won't mess things up if you don't. But if you do, please tell me first thing. Because I have to hope, and I can't be your friend forever.

I took one last glance at Matt's sleeping form, before silently slipping out of the room and heading to the shower.

My hair still dripping wet, I opened up our bedroom door. I had expected Matt to still be asleep, so I was surprised when I walked in on him just pulling on his signature striped shirt. He noticed me immediately, and I saw his face turn red as he hurried to slip it on, before turning to me, his hair still a mess of red.

I stayed still, blushing furiously and scolding myself for the uncontrollable action. He just looks so...hot. There, I said it, that poisonous word, Matt without a shirt is extremely hot. He's not even anything special, he has no muscles, no apparent abs, he's just, thin and soft looking...

"Mels?"

I bit by tongue and shook my head, muttering a barely audible 'Sorry' under my breath as I made my way to my bed, and began to smooth out the covers. A second passed almost awkwardly, before Matt spoke up, giving me a slight pause.

"There's no reason to say sorry" I turned to look at him, and was met with a grin, causing me to raise my eyebrows at him.

"Okay?"

He grinned even wider, "I take it as a compliment is all" he waved me off as he grabbed a pair of clothes off his dresser, "I'm gonna have a shower too, see ya in a bit" he finished, before heading too the bathroom, still smiling goofily. I stayed there, stunned for a moment, before a smile made its way onto my lips too.

Everything is fine.

L's Pov:

I smiled as I watched Matt and Mello playfully bickering over a game of Crazy Taxi near the back of the arcade, while I sat beside Near on a bench just by the door of the shop.

It was nice to see the two of them getting along again. A few days ago, after Light and I's tiff, we came back home to find that the two had made up, which was a pleasant surprise. I was wondering when it would finally happen, as the two had really been pushing it.

But the thing that concerned me is Mello's feelings, because he clearly still has them. And now especially, as I watch them bumping shoulders at the game booth, grinning at each other and sitting rather closely, I can tell that their problem is brimming. And even, Matt may have feelings for Mello as well.

They needed to talk, and I wasn't even sure what was holding them back at this point, at least on Matt's side. Then again, I was being hypocritical in thinking that.

Light was confusing me. He seemed to have feelings for me, clearly actually, but then he didn't want to let me know. And then he wanted to know if I had feelings for him, clearly, but he was also scared to know, so it seemed.

I was confused, and that was kind of a first, and I was also a little scared, because I felt a pull to Light lately. To..I don't exactly know, just to be close to him I supposed. But maybe it was just because I know Light has feelings for me, and I'm acting out.

If I do like Light, well, knowing him it would mostly spell trouble for his emotional state, perfectionism and all. And if I don't, he's going to break eventually, like Mello did..

"Hey L! Near!" 'Speak of the devil, and he shall arrive' I thought listlessly as I turned my head to see Misa and Light at the doorway of the shop. Misa was the one who spoke, while Light was only tagging along behind her. Even though he had broken up with her, she still had the terrible habit of being around him at all times. It was rather irritating, but I could still rely on Misa to know where he is at most times of the day, so it had its bonuses I supposed.

"Hello, Misa, Light, how are you?" I responded as I stood up to greet the two, and vaguely noted Matt and Mello pausing their game in the background to look at the new arrivals.

"I'm great L! I haven't been to the arcade in years" The blond chirped, while Light only sent me a sheepish smile from behind her, silently telling me that he is indeed, not enjoying himself all that much.

"Well that's a pity, as you can tell Matt and Mello are having the time of their lives, and they used to come here quite often" I noted, humoring her a little, and also giving her room to leave and greet the two. I wanted to speak with Light, even if it wasn't about anything important.

"Oh!" She piped, turning her attention to the two boys at the end of the shop for a moment, before turning to me again. "I didn't realize they were here, I'm gonna go say hi okay?" Her gaze flitted to Light for a second, and when he just smiled at her, she headed off to the two with a wave. As she left, Light made to sit beside Near, giving the boy a light greeting that was only responded to with a small nod, as expected.

"How are you doing Light?" I questioned as I took a seat on the bench beside him, and proceeded to gaze at him intently.

He shrugged, not bothering with formalities with me. "Nothing really, I'm just a bit tired" He supplied easily as he looked over at Mello and Matt, who were currently laughing at something Misa said. "They seem happy" He noted.

I nodded, knowing he was thinking along the same lines as I was a few moments ago. "They are, but I don't think you are though" I then told him, earning a glare as he huffed, and a questioning glance from the pale boy beside him. I only smiled lightly, dismissively, and turned my gaze to the group of teens across from us, as Mello and Matt tried to get Misa to play a game of sorts.

Light wasn't going to talk right now, but that was fine. He would, as long as I was persistent.

Matt's Pov:

I was still smiling from today, even though it had been eight hours since we had gotten back. It was just so nice, for everything to be near normal as we played games and teased Misa.

Though I felt a pang in my chest even so, because I have feelings for Mello, and I don't know how to tell him. Kind of funny I supposed, because this is how Mello felt weeks ago, before he told me. Except, I know he feels the same, so only apprehension is holding me back now.

What if he changes his mind?

But I know that that is a silly thought simply built up from nerves. The bigger question, is how will I handle it? A frown made its way on my face as I continued to think, and my stomach started slowly sinking.

What would happen if I tell him? Will he be happy? Upset? Shocked? I want him to be happy, but what if he displays one of the other feelings? What if he thinks I'm lying?

Again, its a silly notion, surely he wouldn't?

I refrained from the urge to groan outwardly as I processed my feelings, and instead turned to look at the blond on the other side of the room, currently laying on his bed on his back, with a book in his hands. Not a schoolbook for once, but a fiction called 'Golden Blood' that I faintly recalled reading when I was younger at Wammy's House. It was about a girl that could time travel, but I honestly couldn't recall much else of it, it had been nine years since I had read it after all.

Dismissing the book, my eyes drifted across his thin frame, and I felt that urge to pull his body to mine again. To just feel his warmth, run my hands through his hair, kiss his cheek...

This time I did shake my head, though he luckily was too focused on his book to notice, and I instead put down my(Light's, actually) partially abandoned laptop and stood up. I wasn't really thinking about it, I just knew I wanted it, and that he most likely wasn't going to refuse.

He wouldn't right?

I came up to his bed, catching his curious gaze with a small and nervous smile, and sat down beside him. I paused for a small second, before removing one of his hands from the book and laying down in the crook of his shoulder, with my head resting my his neck. I shifted slightly, noting that he wasn't moving in the slightest, definitely uncomfortable, and I wrapped his hand around my waist, before letting out a content sigh.

"Matt?" He questioned after a second, earning a shrug from me as I smiled, But didn't respond. He paused for a moment, before just going back to his book and continuing to read, still obviously uncomfortable with the position, but not having the will to tell me to leave.

At that, I relaxed further beside him, and closed my eyes, letting my mind drift.

Mello, despite being so skinny was very comfortable, and I felt content to just lay there forever.

Mello's Pov:

What? Why? How?

Not that I didn't find it extremely contenting, but...why? Out of all the things I thought he wanted when he sat down beside me, cuddling was not one of them, and I was confused beyond belief to as why he did it. A part of me thought that; just maybe, he felt something for me, but I dismissed it once again.

I wasn't really focusing on my book now, (which is quite typical of me) and was instead paying attention to Matt's steady breathing against my cheek. He had his eyes closed, his eyelashes resting against his cheeks enamouringly, and his hair falling in his face slightly due to his goggles being around his neck for once, and the image made me feel terribly fluttery inside.

The plain green shirt he was wearing had ridden up his side a little, revealing a strip of tantalizingly pale white skin, and any other time I would have my eyes glued to that spot. But right now..He just seemed so sweet, content and beautiful, I could only stare at his face. My stomach was squirming, and his lips were in just the right place that if I leaned down, just slightly, I could easily kiss him. I withheld the urge, but I wanted to so badly.

Why would he do this when he knows how I feel about him? And this much?

I wanted to say something, but any words were stuck in my throat, and I forced myself to read my book for the next few moments instead. Trying to ignore the fact that my other hand was still resting on his stomach, and I could so easily move it slightly to reach underneath his shirt...

I bit my lip as I realized that fact, and closed my eyes, fighting with myself between the feeling of wanting to run off and shuffle closer to him.

Maybe...

"Matt..?" I voiced his name for a second time as I opened my eyes, and could care less when it came out as less than a whisper. His only response was a light 'Hm?', and I sighed resignedly instead of saying anything else.

A few seconds later, I barely noticed it when I started to move my thumb around in light circles above his shirt, and when I did, I didn't bother to stop. Especially when a light smile came onto his face. I was confused, I didn't understand why he moved all the way over here, but in essence I didn't mind. He was warm, and comfortable...

I set down my book, not stopping the movements of my thumb, and relaxed into my place beside him while closing my eyes again, my nose burying itself in his hair. He smelled like cinnamon and chocolate, no doubt from mixing both of our shampoo's together, and I found a gentle smile making its way onto my face as well as I snuggled into him some more, my other arm wrapping around him too.

We stayed like that for a long time, I don't know how long, but I was sinking into sleep when I felt him shift and one of his hands placed on my cheek. My eyes opened promptly, and he was looking at me shyly, a blush spread across his cheeks. I opened my mouth in attempts to say something, but I didn't know what to say, if I could even speak in that moment.

His thumb was stroking my cheek, and he moved his face closer to mine, so when he spoke I could feel his breath on my lips.

"Can I kiss you?" It was whispered sultrily even though that probably wasn't the intention, and the words sent tingles through me, and my face to fire. I could barely register what was happening, and disbelief was apparent in my expression, I was sure. I barely managed the nod, before his lips met mine softly and tentatively. I closed my eyes and responded to the kiss, meeting my lips to his compliantly, with my heart practically beating out of my chest.

He lifted his body against mine, kissing gently still, and it was just like I had always imagined a kiss with him being like. Except a hundred times more real.

One of his hands was rubbing my waist lightly now, while the other was supporting his weight. And I was in near the same position, except my hand had moved to his cheek.

Soon, almost too soon, I thought, though I knew we most definitely needed to talk, he pulled away, leaving one chaste kiss on my lips as he met my eyes. I almost choked on all of the emotions I felt in that moment, and a soft smile, bordering on grin made its way onto both of our faces.

I couldn't help leaning in to peck his lips again, before I sat up properly, still positioned closely to him and almost sitting in his lap. He looked dreamy, and not the least bit disturbed about what just happened, this comforted me, but also made more questions rise to the surface of my mind. I took a breath before I spoke, just at the same time as him, but he closed his mouth and let me continue, intently looking at me, and seemly not embarrassed at all.

I paused for a moment, before I collected my words. "D-does this mean you feel the same way..as I do?"

He grinned, and that along with his next words was confirmation enough for me.

"I do, I really do Mels" He murmured softly, making all of my previous questions melt away as he wrapped both of him arms around my neck, a smile still on his lips. "I didn't know I felt this way about you until a few days ago, but..I love you, more than anything"

I grinned, before I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him to me in a firm hug, burying my face into his neck. The feelings coursing through me were uncontrollable, it was an amount of happiness and relief that I had never once felt in my life. I couldn't believe it, but I could so much, and I was so happy.

Matt let out a chuckle a returned the hug fully, kissing my neck softly as he did so, and I felt Like I was going to burst.

Matt loves me.

I pulled back and placed another kiss on his lips, still grinning brightly, and my expression was surely a mirror of his as he kissed me back, pulling me into a lying position beside him and peppering my face with more little kisses.

L's Pov:

Something was different.

I noticed it as soon as Matt and Mello came downstairs late in the morning, and they had obviously slept in, as they were still sleepy. But it was in their eyes, they were most definitely happier than yesterday, and I thought then, that they were happy. But this was a completely different kind of happiness, and it only took me a few seconds to figure out what it was.

A smirk formed on my face as I realized this, and I continued with my preparations of lunch for everyone.

It was when Beyond came out of his room that I was met with another surprise, though this one was a little less important to me, and more concerning.

"Guess what just happened?" He piped childishly, jumping up on the counter beside me and earning curious looks from Matt and Mello, who had taken their places on the living room couch and could just barely see into the kitchen.

I gave him a distracted glance as I continued to stir a rice mixture that I was cooking, and humored him, "What is it Beyond?"

He grinned, leaning closer to me. "Naomi just called me, she wants to go out for a date today"

I frowned at him, "Just be careful okay?" Beyond had problems, and at times, he didn't deal with rejection well. If he got together with her and she dumped him later on..it would spell a fair bit of trouble. My question of course earned a scowl from Beyond, and he hopped off the counter dejectedly.

"Whatever L, you're just upset that I have an opportunity with Naomi and you can't have Light" He muttered as Walked out of the room, surprising me and giving me a pause.

Since when did he even have an idea about that? Though he was wrong, and just acting out. I didn't realize it was obvious, actually I don't think it even is, at all.

"What about you and Light?" Matt questioned, raising his voice to be heard clearly across the room, and I shook my head, turning slightly to face the duo sitting in the other room.

"Nothing, Beyond just overreacts when it comes to me, he's always done it" I explained, and Matt gave a nod, understanding in his eyes. It wasn't a long shot to say that Light had told him a small amount of Beyond and I's past, and that didn't bother me in the slightest, so I just continued with my cooking. Though I placed my attention on them as Matt spoke up again, to Mello this time.

"Hey, if they're going out, would you like to also?" The question was definitely directed at Mello, who gave a pause, before speaking.

"You mean..?" From his tone he was clarifying what he thought Matt was implying, without specifically revealing it to me.

"Yep, a date"

I imagine him withholding a smile, as he replied with a quiet; "Of course"

Matt and Mello left for their 'date' at about 17:00, and Beyond left shortly after, leaving Near, Light and myself in the house alone. Sachiko was, as usual, at her Sunday mothers' group dinner for the evening, and Soichiro wouldn't be back until 20:00 as well.

So it was quiet right now, with Light doing his studies up in his room and Near playing with his new racetrack on the carpet beside the couch, where I was currently watching a poor quality reality Tv show.

My mind was on Light, and the fact that I wanted to talk to him, as I usually did.

Why did I want him to tell me so bad? Well as much as I wanted to deny it, I think it was because I was beginning to have feelings for him. Or rather, I have had for awhile, and thats where this interest came from in the first place.

I had gotten a handle on these feelings, or at least an understanding, but maybe I was ahead of myself. Kissing Light? Romantic feelings for Light? I criticized myself for not knowing more about emotions, apparently these reality Tv shows didn't help me in the slightest either.

If I simplify it, would I want to kiss him?

I didn't know, I care for Light, a lot, but I had never kissed someone before, and I had never particularly craved human contact. Though, Light is the only person I would allow to touch me like that, and have. I didn't particularly mind it either...

I frowned, and turned my gaze to Near, as he seemed deep in thought as well, as he watched his racetrack intently. I considered asking him a question, about what he knows about emotions like this, but I decided not to. Instead I stood up, and headed upstairs to Light and I's bedroom. Near gave me a glance as I left, but being his usual quiet self, he didn't say anything. I doubted that Near would know anything, if I had asked.

When I got upstairs, our door was open, and Light was leaning up against his bed contentedly with a notebook and pen, though he looked up at me when I entered.

"Hey, what's up?" He asked carelessly, though his expression changed to a slightly knowing one when I moved to crouch down across from him.

"I'm fine Light, I just wanted to talk to you" I was going to get it out of him this time, whatever I had to do to get it. He scowled promptly as I spoke, and set his book down.

"Okay L, just say whatever, lets get this interrogation over with" He drawled, though I could see a bit of helplessness in his voice, not just his agitation.

"Wonderful, now-"

He cut me off abruptly, "-No, I don't like you that way, are we done now?"

I paused, giving him a disdainful look and raising my finger to my lip, "That's not actually what I was going to ask you Light-kun" I stated, earning a mixed expression from him; curiosity, disdain, comprehension...an array of emotions really.

"Then what was it?" He sighed, pulling one of his legs to his chest.

"I was wondering how you would feel about a homosexual relationship with me" As soon as I said that, I knew I was pushing it, and the next few things happened so apparently. First his eyes widened, then his eyebrows furrowed, seconds before anger flashed across his face and he tensed up. He glared at me, processing something through his mind, and when I was just about to question him, he raised his fist, and I was sent flying a few feet into the other wall with an empty thump.

I felt dizzy for a second, and found my hand placed on my throbbing cheek as my eyes focused on Light again, who was now standing. I frowned at him.

"That was really unnecessary Light-kun" I stated, though I knew he had plenty reason for the hit, as I made to stand up again. But before I could fully regain my composure, Light was at me again. As he walked up to me, grabbed my shirt and shoved me against the wall harshly. "Light-" His name escaped my lips automatically.

"Shut up L!" He growled, not even two inches from my face, and I found myself almost completely relaxed despite the compromising situation. I guess I trust him.. "You don't get to do this! You know how I feel and you play it like some sort of sick, twisted game!" He paused for a second, before his voice dropped, "You're playing me like a game, just like before"

I flinched at that, as he lowered his head to stare at the floor. It was true, I have always done things like this as if they were a game, its just the way I learned to cope.

"You know how I feel, all to well, we both know it.." His voice was strained, and it got to me. I knew what he was saying, precisely, but sadly, I couldn't help it. A second passed slowly, before I swiftly lifted my knee and kicked him in the gut, hard. He let out a strangled noise as he tumbled off of me, and I was left to regain my balance on the floor.

He was glaring me now, disdainfully, but after a second he just glowered at me and straightened up. "Whatever L, I'm just going to let you cool down" And with that he turned and began to walk off, but before he could make even a few steps I grabbed his arm. At the motion he instinctively turned to hit me again with his fist, but I predicted it this time, and let him go. Before wrapping my other arm around his waist and meeting his fist with my palm, then I met his fearful eyes, a millisecond before my lips were pressed against his.

He froze, not moving at all, and I wondered if I had made a mistake. Light could be unpredictable, I knew, and I could have just made it worse. But just a these thoughts crossed my mind, his body relaxed in mine, his fist unfolded in my hand and his fingers laced with mine. And after what seemed like a hesitant second of thought, he lips began to move against mine.

It felt strange, but welcome and I figured out what was going on rather quickly, as his other hand wound itself around my waist. The kiss deepened, putting me out of my comfort zone until I got used to it, and my heartbeat increased.

Soon he pulled away, and he looked entirely confused. He paused, his eyes sparkling as they stayed glued to mine, and his lips searching for the words for his question, but I beat him to it.

"I have feelings for you, I apologize for playing these games with you, and I didn't mean for it to hurt like that" I spoke gently, and he let his arms both fall back to his side, though he didn't take a step away at all.

"I"m sorry too" He whispered, and raised his hand up to my cheek to emphasize his point. "For this, and for being an idiot"

Beyonds Pov:

I trailed behind Matt and Mello as we walked down the street to get back home, deep in thought.

Matt and Mello bumped into Naomi and I on our date, and we were in the same restaurant for most of the night. Though it wasn't like they interrupted, so that wasn't the reason for my solemn mood in the slightest. I just didn't enjoy the date. All of those days spent fantasizing about nights like that with Naomi, and after being put down by her, I finally got the date, but I just didn't enjoy it as much as I thought I would. We talked, we laughed, we even kissed, but it just wasn't...Exciting?

I didn't know the word, but I guess there just wasn't a connection. Looking at Matt and Mello, they were happily chatting just a few feet ahead of me, holding hands and giving the odd kisses, simply radiating happiness. But me? Shouldn't I be beaming or something? There was nothing wrong with the date, but I feel like I just got back from a gathering with friends.

Did I do something wrong? Is there something wrong with me?

I didn't think so, we kissed, held hands, the like. I sighed. I'm not even really disappointed either, I just feel normal. I guess I can just hang out with Near for the rest of the night.. The prospect cheered me up, if only a little.

We reached the house soon enough, and Matt unlocked the door, letting Mello and I inside, before going inside himself. The two quickly took off their jackets and shoes, and hurried upstairs after saying their goodbyes to me, while I just took my time and made my way into the living room.

Just like when I had left, he was still playing with that racetrack he had gotten earlier, and when I stepped into the room he looked up, giving me a light smile.

"Hello Beyond, how was your date with Naomi?"

I shrugged and sat down beside him, resting my legs in front of myself and using my palms to hold myself up as I responded. "It was okay, I guess"

"Hmm" He acknowledged as he repositioned some of the cars, "Light and L had a fight" he then noted, catching my attention.

"Really? What about?"

He shrugged, "I do not know, I just heard yelling shortly after you left"

"Huh.." I sounded thoughtfully, earning a brief glance from Near, though he didn't say anything else and just continued with his track, seemingly fascinated with the electronic set.

Eventually I was the one who spoke up, "So what have you been up to lately anyway?" since Naomi had declined that date with me, he had been acting a bit differently, I'm sure L and Light noticed it too.

He paused, before turning to look at me, he seemed to be deciding whether to tell me or not. "I have been researching psychology" After a moment he supplied simply, earning a wondering expression from me.

"Explain?" I requested, earning a barely noticeable sigh from him.

"Something happened awhile ago, and I realized it would be best if I taught myself psychology, as our school does not offer the classes"

"Oh" I drawled, "Gotcha"

"Hm" He simply sounded as he raised a hand to curl a piece of his hair, I watched the movement with idle curiosity, but did not question it and instead laid down on the floor with my head resting on my arms.

Near was an interesting one, almost similar to L in a way, but with the exception that I didn't mind him, of course.


	10. If things are good, It'll be bad

Disclaimer: I do not own Deathnote, if I did, Misa would be portrayed as a little less obsessed with Light. Just a little.

L's Pov:

I could hear Matt, Mello and Beyond entering the house, but I didn't acknowledge them as I crouched a few inches away from Light on his bed. My cheek still throbbed lightly, but I didn't pay attention to that. Right now my only attention was on Light.

I knew, I knew a few things.

I knew I pushed him to hard, resulting in the hit that was essentially my fault. I knew that I liked Light a lot that way, it clicked once I kissed him. Really clicked. Before I wasn't sure, but looking back on my attitude, and how I have been treating this situation, I couldn't say no to that.

I knew that I acted irrationally, and so did Light. But the main thing now, is that I knew that this turn of events have shaken Light, and now he is sitting beside me, his head hung as he purposefully put a few inches between us. I had never really noticed how closely we sat in general, until I found myself wanting to sit closely to him again.

For a second time in my life, I watched him sit, drawn into himself, his hands clasped until his knuckles turned white, and his hair covering his face.

After he had apologized to me, he took a long moment to process what had just happened, before he just sat down on his bed like this, only answering my questions with a; 'Just be quiet for a minute, L', that I complied with.

He wasn't taking this so well, and from my view he wanted this badly, but his perfectionist side wouldn't allow it. People at school would surely think differently of him, though only certain ones. Misa would be fine with it, after a while at least, Teru is most likely gay himself, Takada would take it fine as well, and other people didn't matter much. But from Light's view, panicked, he probably thinks that his whole life will be destroyed.

So I am staying quiet, letting him process until he comes to a conclusion, and then I will tell him what I believe. I needed to let him cool down. And it was a good twenty minutes before he did, and even then it was only a quietly murmured 'L' that caught my attention, making me raise my head and turn to face him more.

He still had his gaze on his lap, much to my disappointment.

"Yes Light?" I responded softly, and at my voice he raised his head as well. I was lightly shocked to see that his eyes were teary, and all of his barriers that he usually held up, were gone.

"I, uh.." He trailed off and shifted in his seat, still looking at me but avoiding my gaze. I raised a hand and placed it on his neck, a few of my fingers cording through his hair as I did so, and he let out a sigh in response, before he continued.

"I don't know what to do...now" I nodded, but didn't say anything, eliciting another sigh from him. "You..I like you, and I have for years, but I can't handle it"

"It will be fine, despite what you think, people wouldn't really be that surprised" I offered, and after a couple seconds of consideration he finally met my eyes.

"We can't tell anybody" He stated firmly, and promptly earned a frown from me.

"Yes we can Light, people won't mind at all" I reinstated, and Light scowled at me.

"No we can't, I will do this with you because I want to, but I won't let anybody know, and neither will you" He grit out the words, and I felt a pang in my chest. So now I knew more, not just that he is terrified of telling people of the status that we apparently have, but he's also scared to let me know he cares.

"Light-"

"No" He shook his head, and I stayed quiet, letting him continue. "I want this L, and don't make me say any of those words, okay?" I nodded, perpetually annoyed at his complex "and I don't want anybody to know, so can you do this with me?"

Hide? From everyone? We are in a house of six, and at school, there is only a 40% chance that this will stay hidden for more than a few weeks. He will adjust in time, so I guess it could work, many teens stay hidden for years before they come out together...and its not that big of a deal, as much as it bothers me, I guess.

Light was glaring at me as I hesitated, and one of his hands were gripping the blanket on his bed. clearly, he was scared that I would disagree. I wanted to.

"Alright, Light" I breathed out after a moment, and in return Light let out a relieved sigh.

"Thank you"

"Hmm" I sounded as a frown came to my face, and Light could easily see that I wasn't okay with this. After a second he leaned into me a little, one of his hands resting on my leg.

"L, I know you don't like this, but it won't be forever okay?" In other words he's saying, 'I want this, but its hard for me, so help me' and I could respect that, so I nodded.

"okay"

A light smile played on his lips, before he leaned in and kissed me again. This time it was different though, not rushed, and I enjoyed it much more.

Mello's Pov:

Light and L weren't out of bed yet, and clearly Matt thought is was odd as well because he mentioned it as we walked downstairs. Though I ended up dismissing it, they were probably just skipping breakfast or something..Actually that probably wasn't it, but I could really care less and didn't want to ponder it that much.

"So uh.." Matt paused in the middle of the stairs, and I followed suit with a questioning look, urging him to continue. "I just, are we going to let everyone know? Like at school?"

He looked worried, for which reason I didn't know. He may have been scared of people knowing, or having to hide it. Or maybe he was worried that I was embarrassed about him, but in that case I found it to be ludicrous. Either way, I smirked at him and pulled him down a few steps by the waist, before holding him against me, our faces only a few inches apart.

"In my opinion, we don't have to hide it. If somebody has a problem, they can go get fucked, right?"

This earned a chuckle from Matt, and he landed a peck on my lips, his eyes meeting mine sincerely. "I agree completely"

I grinned in response, and continued walking down the stairs with him, my arms still wound around his waist, but loosely this time.

Downstairs in the kitchen Sachiko was making some sort of Japanese pancakes, which was okay for breakfast in my opinion, and Beyond and Near were in the living room, sitting on the floor and making structures out of books from the bookshelf. Beyond grinned when he noticed us, and waved a light greeting before turning back to the structure of books the two were making. Near ignored us completely, of course, so my attention went to their structure, I'm sure Matt's was too. It wasn't just a waste of space this time, but it didn't even make anything interesting. Maybe it resembled the Tokyo Tower a little...but hardly.

I couldn't help but question it as me and Matt sat down on the couch, though it wasn't rudely, I was a pretty good mood. "What are you guys' building this time?"

Apperently my lack of snarky tone caught Near's attention, as he finally looked up at us blankly. "Mello is in a good mood" He remarked, but didn't answer the question. I scowled at him.

"Well its steadily dropping, so answer the question"

Matt chuckled beside me, and Near shook his head, before turning back to the structure. Then, Beyond took the initiative after placing another few books onto it, and looked up at me with a grin.

"It's the Tokyo tower" He simply offered, before going back to it. I raised and eyebrow and Matt let out a 'huh?' from beside me.

"How?" I questioned. "It doesn't even looks close" Actually it did, considering I was correct in my guess but...it hardly did still.

"Its the base" Near deadpanne, and I caught the sarcastic tone in his voice, But I only huffed and stood up in response, followed by Matt as I walked over to Near. He looked up at me, wondering what I was doing, and I promptly leaned down and flicked his cheek, earning a confused expression from him as he stared at me.

"What was that?"

"I flicked you, dimwit" I told him, mimicking his deadpan as I straightened up and turned to look at Matt with a smile.

"Wanna go to the park before school?"

"Sure" He grinned.

Matt's Pov:

Who knew that everybody else in school would know about us so quickly, not that I minded to much, but it was still a little awkward. Misa, who had greeted us at our first class, quickly caught on, and we took it in stride as she chirped excitedly about how happy for us she was. Then Takada and Mikami came up to us after that class and, with genuine surprise asked us a few questions, before clapping me on the back and saying Mello was a catch.

I had to agree, but the attention wasn't exactly what I wanted.

So by lunch all of our classmates had caught on, along with a few teachers and other students. We did kiss in the hallways a few times, so we weren't exactly secretive either, and even if I felt a little uncomfortable with the PDA, I liked it.

People didn't seem to judge either, they just talked about us a little more than the other couples. I guess for once I was glad we were in Japan, as England wouldn't have been this accepting with it. We would have had to put up with a few haters at the least.

So I was pretty happy when me and Mello arrived at the cafeteria, and sat down by our group of friends that I honestly didn't think we would have when we first arrived in Japan. Let alone, for them to actually like us.

"Hey guys, having fun?" Beyond greeted us with a grin as we sat down, and the greeting was followed by Misa as she handed us two lunch boxes.

"Hey, and yes, actually we have been" Mello told everyone with a rather cocky smirk, and I promptly blushed as I tore into my box.

"I'm sure Matt and Mello are having plenty of fun, in fact they started their day by teasing me, so I don't see why they wouldn't" Near's sarcastic remark came from beside Misa, and I couldn't help but let out a chuckle alongside Mello.

"And how exactly did they pick on you Near?" Takada asked politely, though a smile was on her face.

He turned to her with a frown, "Are you finding amusement in my distress miss Takada?" he spoke pointedly, and takada promptly replied.

"No, of course not Near" She said innocently.

Their banter continued, Near dropping out of the conversation as Misa took to joking around with L, but I didn't pay much attention as I leaned against Mello and continued eating my meal.

I had friends, a home that was guaranteed for the next two years, and my best friend who I could kiss. It couldn't get much better than this, and clearly Mello was thinking the same as he shared a smile with me.

"How do you guys feel about a movie night?" Beyond cheerfully shouted from the bootroom as he came back from wherever he had gone. L gave the hallway a dubious glance, Though Mello was the one who responded, as he came back from the kitchen with a bowl of chocolate ice cream.

"Movies are full of bad actors and plot holes, why?" He spoke as he plopped down beside me on the couch, and not a second later Beyond was in the living room doorway with a grocery bag in hand, and a predictable grin on his face.

"Because its fun, and me and L used to do it all the time" He supplied, while he made his way to the couch and took a seat beside L who was crouched with his laptop.

"L and I" The ravenette corrected him, eyes not leaving the screen, before he continued "and I only ever did it because Roger forced me to hang out with you, and I had nothing better to do"

I perked up at the name, and so did Mello, I noticed. But before we could say anything Beyond was whining to L with a pout. Note that Beyond pouting just didn't suit him, and I wished he would stop.

"But L, you watch that dumb TV series, what is it? Terrace House?- all of the time, and you don't want to watch an actually good film with all of us?" He paused, turning to Mello and I "and you guys don't either, whats wrong with you?"

Mello sighed, "I'll watch a few movies if they're okay, but-" he started, but was promptly cut off by L.

"Roger Ruvie from Wammy's House, yes, we went there as well"

I wasn't exactly expecting L to have noticed our reaction to the name, but I guess it was at least a bit expected, so I didn't say anything about him interrupting. But, he was awfully short about it, and it surprised me. I had noticed earlier that he was in an odd mood, but this was the most that he had shown it all day.

Of course Mello didn't like being interrupted though.

"What is wrong with you today? You've been short since yesterday morning" He grumbled with a scowl on his face, and even Beyond was looking at L questioningly now. L only sighed in response, and didn't answer, so after a few silent seconds of Mello's glaring Beyond spoke up again and redirected the conversation.

"So, movie or not?"

I shrugged, dismissing L's bad mood and responded to Beyond.

"I'll watch a movie, unlike Mello and L I don't pick them apart" I told him with a smirk, and Beyond grinned,

"Alright, I'm going to make some popcorn, and bring out a few snacks-" He stood up with the bag in hand. "Go so if Near and Light will join us, will you?"

I nodded, and with that he headed off to the kitchen. Leaving Mello to question L again.

"Seriously, what is going on with you?"

"I don't want to talk about it Mello, I'm fine" He told us pointedly, and though I didn't believe him, I stood up anyways and pulled Mello and his ice cream with me.

"C'mon, lets go see if Light and Near want to join us"

"Alright" He followed suit as I headed up the stairs, but he still gave L an annoyed look as we left. I didn't bother saying anything, Mello didn't like being told 'no', but he would quickly get over it.

Light's Pov:

Okay, so watching Matt cuddled in Mello's lap as we watched a movie made me feel a little annoyed. But I still didn't want anybody to know about L and I.

Who knows if we will even work out? And as much as I would like to be comfortable around L in public, I can't. People knowing, it made me sick to my stomach, even if they were practically okay with it. I didn't want to be known as 'gay', and I didn't want to be known as 'different'. People would label me, and I wouldn't be able to take it. It would be like before I came here, and I couldn't live through that again. Ever.

So I waited the movie through, meanwhile sitting a few inches away from L, and closer to Beyond. I picked apart the actors, and the plot, and I spared Matt and Mello just a few jealous glances. I was also having an inward battle, because I wasn't exactly happy like this, things with L and I were tense like this, and like this, it wasn't what I wanted.

Which is exactly why I didn't want this to happen in the first place, and now everything is messed up.

By the time the credits were rolling I wanted to end my existence, as I couldn't stop thinking about us. But nontheless, I silently helped clean up the small mess we had made and headed up to my room afterwards, soon followed by L.

As expected, shortly after I got up to our room and sat down on my bed, L joined me. I didn't look at him as the bed sunk under his weight beside me, but I did turn my head in surprise when his arms looped around my waist and his lips pressed against my neck.

We stayed in silence for awhile before he spoke.

"I think we should forget about everybody else, its just us"

Words of advice from L were strange, especially sentimental ones like this. But my response was a nod, followed by and smile as I turned around in his grasp to look at him.

"I love you, you know" It was a fact, nothing super sentimental like that, just a fact. But I did, he helped me when I was younger to overcome my ridiculous fears, and I would never forget him. So in essence, even if I wasn't feeling very loving at the moment, I still loved him.

"I know, and so do I" He stated, before leaning in and capturing my lips. It felt good, a feeling I had wanted all of the time before, and now I had it. So even as tense as things were, I met the kiss fully, ran one hand through his thick locks of hair, and bit his lip in request to deepen the kiss. By which he complied with as his hands made there way under my shirt, and caused me to shiver at the unfamiliar feeling.

L's Pov:

I knew it was coming.

One week of watching Matt and Mello have a fairly smooth relationship, while we hid, was wearing on Light and I both. I wasn't exactly happy, mainly in public, and as much as I would enjoy hiding than not being with Light, it wasn't fair to us.

So at dinner, with everybody when Beyond made a joking comment about how Light and I should 'totally get together' because Matt and Mello are, Light snapped.

"Well its nice to know that you would be so supportive Beyond" He grit out, as he dropped his fork onto his plate and leaned back in his chair with a glare, immediately catching the attention of everybody at the table. "Because that would be such a great situation right?"

He earned a bunch of confused looks from everyone, including Soichiro and Sachiko, and I was about to speak before Soichiro questioned him.

"Light, that shouldn't have offended you, don't be so rude even if Beyond is family"

Light just snorted, before abruptly standing up from his seat and pushing his plate away.

"Sorry, but excuse me, I'm not hungry anymore" His voice was bitter as he walked out of the room towards the stairs, leaving behind a bunch of confused gazes, and it was a few seconds into his absence Until Mello spoke up.

"Okay, what was that?" His baffled voice cut through the silence as he directed the question at me, while I sighed and stood up.

"I'm going to go talk to him" I told them as I stood up, but I stopped when Matt spoke up.

"Are you guys together?"

I paused and looked over my shoulder, I should have known that Matt would figure it out before anyone else... Soichiro gave Matt a startled look when he said that, but stayed silent as he waited for my explanation.

"For a little under two weeks, yes" I suppled, before I left them in favor of going upstairs to talk with Light. I didn't care if they knew now, they needed to, whether Light liked it or not.

I assume they would have figured it out anyways.

Light was sitting in the desktop chair when I got to our room, and immediately he looked up at me, stopping the back and forth motion that he was making on the wheels before I stepped inside. "They know now" He stated more than questioned, as I walked up to him with a nod.

"Yes, they do"

He sighed in response, and went quiet, so I took the initiative and crouched down in front of him, grabbing his hand in the process as I looked him in the eyes. He didn't hide his face this time, just stared at me blankly.

"Light, we need to come out now" His frown deepened, but I continued, he needed to hear this. "Everyone comes out eventually, and it is doing more harm than good to us, to not, and to everybody else who is in this situation too. People are going to know, but they won't care, they will think a little differently of you of course, but knowing you it won't change your position in the world"

He just stared at me with that same blank look and a frown, and I stayed silent until he gave in and spoke up.

"I didn't want anyone to know" He muttered disdainfully, earning a shrug from me.

"But now they do, and its perfectly okay Light. So lets get our acts' together"

"All I ever do is act" He noted, still frowning at me.

"Then drop the act"

"Wow, I wouldn't have thought.."

Takada was almost gaping as she stared at Light and I holding hands, while Teru looked genuinely surprised, and Misa simply smiled. Misa's reaction was a bit unexpected, but it could only mean she somehow knew already.

Right now we are at the front gates of the school, Light and I having found our main school friends just arriving at the gates when we did. Light was nervous, and had tried to let go of my hand, but I kept up and nearly dragged Light over to the small group. Then after we greeted them, they inquired about the clear sign of holding hands, and we came out.

Simply that. It was easier than I thought it would be, that is for sure, to just say it. I thought it might have been at least a little hard for me, but it wasn't bad at all. I could tell Light wasn't comfortable though.

He was tense and his hand was a bit sweaty, even though he kept on a polite and slightly embarrassed face for them.

"Well, I don't mind at all you two, though it does surprise me" Teru chuckled, and he had the most friendly smile on his face.

"Well, thank you, I wasn't so sure how you would react" Light's reply was simple, polite again, and he smiled lightly. But as soon as the reply was finished Misa came up to him with smile and clapped him on the back.

"I'm glad that you told us" She chirped with a grin, and I couldn't help that think 'yes, she had to have known for awhile, if only by a hunch'. "We wouldn't want you two to be perpetual closet cases now would we?"

Light gave her an interested look, as if he couldn't believe that she was fine with it, but nodded gratefully. "Yea, we wouldn't want that Misa"

"Well.." Takada gave a polite cough to catch our attention, before she pointed to the school building. "We should get going, class starts in a few minutes"

"Four minutes" Light smiled reassuringly, "But don't worry, thats plenty of time"

Beyond's Pov:

The auditorium was busy, as expected. Today, much to the surprise of most of the students, two scholarships were being announced. It surprised me as well, and I don't think any of the teachers knew that this was going to happen until today either. It just goes to show how unprepared even the best of schools can be.

I was sitting beside Matt and Mello, Near having gone off into a corner somewhere saying that; "It is much to crowded in here for comfort" so he was going to be somewhere on the sidelines watching, and L was a few seats away. I couldn't see Light from where I was, but I am certain that he is somewhere around here too, just out of view.

As we waited for the announcer to arrive at the stage, Matt and Mello chatted idly, and though I'm sure they didn't mean it, they were practically ignoring me. So I was getting bored and fidgety, shifting unconsciously in my seat every few seconds and paying a large amount of attention on the cherry wood ceiling. I wish Near had stayed with me, and now I was seated beside a rather chubby kid, who smelled faintly of popcorn and kept trying to talk to me. I ignored him.

It was approximately fifteen grueling minutes of pretending not to hear the kid, before the school's principal came up onto the stage, tapping the mike in a vague order for everyone to quiet down. It was only when most of the crowd calmed down that I heard Mello's hushed and almost frustrated; "We'll talk about this later" and turned to look at the two inquiringly. But I was only met with a dismissive shrug from Matt before Mr. Omori began to speak.

I blurred out most of it, not caring. I knew that L and Light would be the ones getting the scholarships, so I didn't need to, and soon enough L was called onto the stage, and once he was up, quite predictably Light was called.

I should have noticed L's unsure expression when he was sitting down before, but now I really did now when no one stood up to enter the stage. L's eyes clearly scanned the crowd, and rested on me eventually, asking the silent question of; if I knew anything. But I could only shake my head, slight worry and memories lacing my thoughts.

Light's name was called again, before L spoke quietly to Mr. Omori, and after a few of what seemed to be questions, Mr. Omori turned back to the mike.

"Well, it seems Yagami Light isn't here today, so for now we will only assign the first scholarship to L-"

The ceremony continued without Light, and L put up a small speech of thanks before hurrying over to us. I noticed Near catch up with him partway down the stairway, and asking a few questions as they shuffled through the seats, until they arrived by us. Immediately Mello straightened up to question L.

"Where is he?"

But L only shook his head, gaze drifting to me, and solidifying my suspicions. "I believe Light-kun panicked because of his recent outing, and has left the school grounds" His voice was solemn, a little worried, and he was slouched more than usual.

"Okay, so he probably just went home right?" Matt spoke up this time, him seeming a little more worried then his boyfriend, but more confused than anything. He was most likely thinking something along the lines of 'Why would Light, being so composed in general, miss the scholarship ceremony just because he was upset?'. It was reasonable, as they didn't know Light so well as L and I.

"No, and I'm betting we are going to have to go find him before he does something exceptionally stupid" I mumbled "Last time he snuck into a bar called the Blue Note and got beaten up, so.." I trailed off in the explanation, Leaving Matt and Mello to give me a baffled look. It certainly wasn't expected of Light to act this way, but it happened here and there, and when it did, from experience I knew he would get into some sort of trouble.

L sighed, "Yes, but luckily that place closed down last year, so he can't go there anymore. But I'm going to have to go find him, and without the Blue Note he will go somewhere else.." L spoke with an unusually downcast tone, and he appeared to be irritated as he straightened out his posture a little. I didn't blame him for feeling irritated though. "I'm skipping the rest of school and hopefully I won't have to contact Soichiro, so help me find him if you want" He finished, and looked at Matt and Mello inquiringly.

"We'll help, I don't care about missing classes" Mello spoke up, and Matt nodded in agreement, earning a grateful nod from L.

"Alright"


	11. If you're missing, life will find you

Disclaimer: I do not own Deathnote, If I did, Let's see...Oh! I know. I wouldn't let Netflix make a movie out of it, or at least, I would demand that I made most of it myself.

Matt's Pov:

I'm pretty hopeless, but then again so is Light. Really, he apparently couldn't take being out of the closet, so he just goes off and runs away from his problems? I'm not even that pathetic, Even if I have run away from my own problems a few times.

Mello looks grumpy as we walk down the dimming street, dodging the odd passerby as we do so. And I didn't blame him either, I started it when the scholarships were being announced, which is again, why I'm so hopeless.

I just feel like, if this relationship doesn't work out, I'm going to lose my best friend, Which, I don't even know if that's a ridiculous thought or not. Surely we would never separate? Because I couldn't live without Mello..he's like my...other half I guess. I love him, and honestly I would do whatever he wanted me to, if he asked. Even if he was cruel to me I would stay, I'm just that attached to him I guess.

I gave Mello a sideways look as we kept walking, noting his furrowed eyebrows, bit lip, and downcast gaze easily. He looked frustrated, as he probably didn't know the answer to my earlier question either.

'what happens if for some reason we don't work out in the future? Will we still be friends?'

I guess we just have to wait and see, but I for one never want to leave Mello. In any way. If something happened in the future I would persist to just be friends with him, and I am certain he would too. But I don't know what that situation would be like in the future, right at this moment, and I wouldn't until it happened, so I guess..my fear, is doubt in my future self.

I shook my head, trying to get rid of those concerning thoughts as I let out a sigh. This caught Mello's attention, as he raised his head and quirked an eyebrow at me, silently asking what was wrong, even though he already knew.

I smiled at him awkwardly and shrugged, before I redirected the topic "Where do you think Light would go?" I asked, but he only shook his head, rather helplessly in fact before he responded.

"I have no idea, and logically I don't see how walking around like this is even helping, we don't know Light like L and Beyond do"

"Yea.." I sighed again, we know Light well, but we don't know him as personally as we could, like he just said. "Do you have idea where he could be though?"

"Bars?" He spoke halfheartedly, and ran a hand through his hair, looking at me from the corner of his eyes as his hand found the beads of his rosary and twirled the wooden chips absentmindedly. "I wouldn't exactly know where any are though, and besides, we couldn't get in any without IDs" The look he gave me then was questioning, and I returned it with a smirk.

"Well, I don't have any of those, you'd know"

He huffed, "I was sorta hoping I had missed something" he stated humorously, before letting out a chuckle. I smiled in response, thoughts drifting to that night from weeks before. Maybe if that wasn't such a catastrophe, I would have made an ID for myself, but I didn't want anything like that to happen ever again, so I hadn't.

"So, aside from bars, which are clearly out of our reach, where else?" Of course there is that gay bar that I went to, but I wasn't keen on that, even if Light could be there...Hell, there is actually quite a chance Light has gone there. That blue note place, from what I could tell, Light had connections to it and that was the only reason he was able to go there. So, assuming he doesn't have an ID, and I do doubt L would have allowed Light to have one, he is probably at one of those similar places. And that one I went to is closest to this area.

Great.

I never told Mello about that, and I didn't want to. And if I suggested one of those kinds he would know that something is off, because why would I know about specific bars? He is too smart, he would definitely pry.

I could just not say anything, but if Light really does get into such trouble like L says... and I should tell Mello about it, even if I have put behind me its the right thing to do.

"Matt?"

My gaze snapped up from the cement where I was apparently staring, and I looked up to Mello's calculating expression. It took me a moment to figure out that he had spoken, and I hadn't even noticed.

"Sorry, what?" But he completely redirected the topic, ignoring my apology.

"Are you thinking about earlier that hard?" He stopped walking, and was now gazing at me rather intensely, I wondered if he even realized he was could do that with just his eyes. But I shook my head halfheartedly in response, forgetting about that passing thought as I did so. He walked up to me and put a hand on my arm anyways, still looking at me in the eyes, but softly this time. "Don't worry about the future, we'll get through any of that alright? I would never leave you, even if stuff went down" He reassured, and I felt sick to my stomach now.

I had made out with a complete stranger at a bar, got drunk, smoked, and wandered around at night alone. Even though we weren't together then, and I technically didn't cheat on him, it was still a big mistake and it was dangerous too.

"Mello..." At my voice his expression changed, and I was certain that he realized I was thinking about something else.

"Matt?" He voiced uncertainly, and gave me a dour look. I bit my lip, my stomach sinking slowly as I tried to figure out what to say.

"Well...I um" I tried, and Mello gave out a sigh filled with an emotion that I couldn't read. I gave him a regretful look before I continued. "I did something awhile ago.." He raised an eyebrow at me, and as much as I wanted to, I didn't look away from his questioning gaze. I didn't say anything for a moment, and he eventually reached for my hand, lacing his fingers through mine and encouraging me to continue.

"I-I went to a bar and got really drunk, and made out with this guy..." I paused to observe his expression, which now looked pained. I immediately felt even more guilty, and before I knew it, more words were spilling from my lips. "I never saw him again, and we didn't do anything more, I left right after I realized it was bad but I was thinking just now that Light might be there, honestly I almost forgot about the place and only remembered-"

"Matt"

I stopped my trailing rant, and my mouth closed with an audible click at his tone, as I stared at him hesitantly. Much to my relief he was still holding my hand, even if his posture was turned away from me slightly now.

"We're going to talk about this later okay?" He took a deep breath and grit out the next words "That doesn't mean I'm fine with this though, I'm pretty mad actually. But if you think Light may have gone to this place, then we should get this out of the way first, alright?"

I ducked my head in response, muttering a quiet "Okay" as I turned back the way we came, and pulled Mello with me. "The place is a few blocks away from Misa's, and there are others, but only one or two that I know of that we can get into" I informed him in a quiet tone, and only earned a small sound of acknowledgement from him as he followed my lead.

He still didn't let go of my hand as we walked, and somehow that made me all the more disturbed by his reaction. I thought he would have been a little more assertive that he was upset with me, and would get angry at me, but for whatever reason he was calm...

I didn't understand Mello's reaction, but I dismissed it as I led us to our new destination. Like he said, we would talk about it later, and until then we needed to find Light.

The place looked the same as before, only this this time I was more used to it and could pay more attention to the area if I had wanted. And though I was still quite uncomfortable here, I could at least keep a clear head this time.

Mello on the other hand, looked about ready to have a panic attack. His eyes were wide as we stood just inside by the doorway, and he kept glancing in every direction every few seconds. At least I knew it wasn't just me that was freaked out by the rowdy building, and in retrospect, it was probably because of living such a sheltered lifestyle at Wammy's that we weren't comfortable here. Not just our preferences.

I gripped Mello's hand in mine, noting how sweaty both of our's were, and with a quick deciding glance to Mello I pulled us through the crowd. Through the loud music and bright lights I registered people calling out to us, Probably finding Mello to be incredibly sexy in his skin tight leather, and I cringed as I realized that. Though I opted to ignore it and continued to guide our way to the tables, picking one quite quickly at a darker end of the room and sitting us down.

When I plopped down in my seat, I found Mello giving me an incredulous look from across the cheap wooden platform. Promptly I questioned him with a "What?" that barely made it through the sound of techno music.

"You actually came here on your own?" A smirk was on his face, so I didn't take offense, and leaned over the table to playfully pushed him on the shoulder.

"I actually did, now, do you see a certain perfectionist anywhere?"

At my question he brought his gaze over to the crowd, and scanned the area, but in the second he did that, I felt a buzz in my pocket. Promptly I pulled my phone out and flipped it open, to see a call from L displayed, Mello's attention was on me now as I hesitantly showed him the display on the screen.

"Decline and text him, it's to loud in here" He supplied after a second, and I complied agreeably, putting together a quick text. Meanwhile Mello went back to looking through the crowd.

(Me: Cant talk on phone rt now, whats up?)

It was only a second before my phone vibrated again with his response.

(L: I was wondering if you two found him)

(Me: We havnt, srry)

(L: You text like a twelve-year old Matt, and that's fine, it's not your job anyways -BB)

I frowned at the last text, but didn't have time to contemplate it further when Mello suddenly spoke up with a "Hey", causing me to lift my head from the screen quickly. After a second I recognized Light sitting at a table in the direction that Mello was now pointing.

"Thats him" I guess my hunch was right, but I didn't contemplate any of that further as Mello stood up and reached for my phone.

"You go over there, I'll text L the street and see if they can get out here"

With a quick nod I handed him the phone and stood up, speaking a barely audible agreement as I began to my way over to Light, who obviously hadn't noticed us at all, and left Mello to text L.

When I was no more than a few feet away from the brunette, I noticed that he was really, really drunk. Which surprised me, and I finally realized why L and Beyond where so worried about him running off. He looked like a mess from my view of his side, with his hair a tousled mess, his uniform wrinkled and stained with what was most likely beer, and his expression was completely downcast. He had a can of beer in his hand, which I guess he probably convinced the waitress to give him with pure charm. As well as other drinks, because from the way he seemed to find the table so interesting with a vacant look, he has had way to many.

I only hesitated for a few seconds before I approached him, and laid a hand on his shoulder, about to speak his name. But before any words could come out of my mouth, Light turned around sharply and slapped my hand away, along with a slurred shout that was probably something like; "Don't you dare touch me" But came out more like "On't you sare tough me"

I cringed and withdrew a little bit, and once Light realized who I was he froze, staring at me with wide eyes for a long moment. I didn't know what to say, or do for a moment, but then Mello came up from beside me with a scowl. And before Light could find the words to say anything at all, the blond firmly grabbed Light's arm and dragged him roughly out of his seat.

"Come on idiot, L's going to be here in a few minutes" Mello snapped, as Light tried to pull away with a few distorted protests, but Mello had a good grip on him and with a nod to me began to drag the older boy through the bar. I followed, smiling lightly at Mello's annoyed expression when Light continued talking nonsense and kept on resisting his grip.

Soon we were outside, and Mello tossed me my phone that he had been holding in his hand, as he didn't have pockets, before turning to Light and pushing him to sit on the ground with a few curses. People were staring at us, but I don't even think Mello noticed, and I didn't care, instead opting to watch as Light sat in a fetal position on the ground, while Mello leaned against the wall beside him.

"L's going to be here in a few minutes, and he got a friend to drive them, so we won't have to drag Light on a long walk" He supplied as I leaned against the wall as well, and I nodded in response before we fell into silence. Though eventually a choked sob broke the silence, and when I looked down at Light, I realized the teen was furiously crying now.

"Um.." I trailed off as I gave Mello a questioning look, but he only shook his head and let out a sigh, before kneeling down a giving Light a gentle push.

"Hey, put yourself together" He snapped, and I couldn't help think that; Mello's harsh tone wasn't going to do anything good. I tried to voice this, but Mello shot me a glare that quieted me, and then demanded that Light look up at him.

After a moment Light complied, and raised his teary eyes to meet Mello's. I still had a hard time believing that Light could look so broken down, with his eyes red and puffy, tears streaming down his cheeks and his hair completely out of place and dull looking. Speaking of dull, his expression was so dull that it was almost shocking, like he was a zombie.

But before I could contemplate this any longer, Mello raised his fist and landed a punch squarely on Light's jaw, sending Light to the ground seconds before I realized what happened and reacted, jumping into a standing position by the wall and giving Mello an incredulous look.

"What the hell Mello! What was that for?"

He simply shrugged and stood up again. "The bastard deserved it for being such a bloody useless twit"

I gaped at him, before letting out a disbelieving noise and stepping over to Light, leaning over him to make sure that nothing was broken. Meanwhile Mello just leaned up against the wall again, and proceeded to wait for L.

L's Pov:

When we all got back to house with Light in tow, I sent Matt and Mello inside to keep Soichiro in the living room, along with a thank you to them for finding Light. Before I requested Beyond's assistance to help me get Light upstairs, meanwhile hoping that he wouldn't vomit on the way.

We had done this twice before, and the other times we were lucky.

Halfway up the stairs though, shortly after Soichiro calling at us and we ignored him, Light started to mumble something, and began to protest our restraints, so I immediately knew that this time we weren't so lucky in that prospect.

"Beyond, he's going to vomit, go grab something, quick!" I snapped, and Beyond gave me a dubious look in response.

"Like what?"

"I don't know! Just hurry" The ravenette gave me a dirty look this time at the demand, though he rushed up the rest of the stairs anyways. But it was too late, when after a few seconds Light began to heave on the stairs steps, emptying the contents of his stomach onto the cherry wood flooring as I tried telling him to stay as quiet as possible. He seemed to figure out what I was telling him, luckily, and restrained from to much coughing.

I was mentally cursing when Beyond came back with a silver bucket on Light's third heave, and I snapped a frustrated "Finally!" at him as I grabbed the bucket and held it under Light. Luckily he was coherent enough to grasp the bucket in his hands as he continued vomiting, but the hallway was still a mess now.

Beyond was holding his hand up to his nose by the time Light was done choking on his stomach acids, and I once again demanded that Beyond hurry to help me get Light up to our room. He grumbled a few obscenities, but dropped his hand from his nose and helped me out the rest of the way, until we had Light flopped on top of his bed's covers.

"I'm not cleaning the stairs" The ravenette stated stubbornly as he stood a few feet away from Light who was now innocently passed out, and quite frankly Beyond looked like he was going to puke as well. I sent him a glare when he said it, and he sighed resignedly before leaving the room, knowing that he would be in trouble too if we were found out.

Once the door was shut behind him, I let out a sigh and made my way over to our dresser, picking out some pajamas before I went back to Light. He was definitely going to receive a talking to from me in the morning for this hassle, that I knew, and I was beyond angry at him right now.

I proceeded to strip him, not finding it awkward in the least as I finished changing his clothes, and when I was done I went to help Beyond clean the stairs. Forcing myself into having at least some pity on the teen for the trouble.

Matt's Pov:

When we got into the livingroom ahead of Light, L and Beyond, Soichiro immediately stood up from his seat beside Sachiko. It was pretty late in the day, so I quickly realized that they were wondering where we were all evening, even before he spoke up.

"Where have you been, and where are the others?" He spoke firmly, anger and worry tinging his words as Sachiko stood up beside him with a softer look of concern on her features. I opened my mouth to respond, but Mello beat me to it, it didn't bother me as I knew I would have probably just messed everything up.

"We were at a party, and they're coming, they were just a bit behind us on the walk home" The blond supplied, and Soichiro scowled in that Fatherly way.

"Why didn't you tell us then? Who knows what could have happened, you never know, and who's party was it?" The drilling questions were familiar to me, as Roger did it to us at Wammy's on an almost weekly basis, we got into lots of trouble back then.

Mello shrugged "We just didn't think about it, okay?" It was then that I heard the front door open, and Soichiro averted his gaze to the hallway, before going back to us.

"Boys?" He called, but received only some shuffling as an answer, as they could be faintly heard going up the stairs, his questioning gaze was on us still, and he was clearly suspicious. This was kind of bad, and I gave Mello and discreet concerned look, hoping the blond would pull through because I definitely wouldn't be able to.

"What going on? And don't you dare lie you two, I know they could hear me" I cringed at his firm voice, and waited for Mello's response with concern, as he paused nervously now.

"Well, uh..." Mello mumbled, and I quickly caught on with an inward smile as Soichiro gave us a knowing look. "At the party Light had a fight with this girl, and she threw colored punch at him, so he's kind of.."

"Sticky, so is L" I added, and I watched as Soichiro's expression changed into something akin to incredulity, but understanding. It was a perfect reason for Light to not want to show his face, as he hated being anything less than perfect in front of anybody. Plus it was unbelievably cliche.

"Alright" he sighed, and quite clearly he believed it "Thats reasonable, but I'm talking to all of you in the morning okay?"

Mello grinned and turned away with a wave, and a "yes sir" thrown over his shoulder, before he grabbed my hand and pulled me up the stairs. I had a grin on my face the second we turned around, and I noticed that Mello had a similar one on his too. His grin was probably more about the fact that we actually fooled Soichiro though, as someone a little smarter would definitely have been able to figure it out.

But then my grin dropped, along with Mello's as well, when we got halfway up the stairs and saw the mess up there, as Beyond was at work cleaning it along with L, who seemed to have just joined.

"Did he seriously puke?" Mello's voice was annoyed, clearly, but he seemed to refuse to cover his nose from the smell just as L and Beyond were doing. I covered my nose as well, with a muttered "Gross" under my breath.

"Yes, apparently luck wasn't on our side today, care to help?" Beyond snickered as he paused in his cleaning and threw a piece of paper towel into what was definitely the bathroom's garbage can. L gave us a glance as Beyond spoke, but he didn't say anything.

Mello scrunched his nose, "Definitely not" he responded, and proceeded to make his way around the partially cleaned up mess, with me following right behind him as I eyed the two lookalikes dubiously. We entered our bedroom quite quickly after passing them, and only then, when I caught Mello's serious expression did I remember that we were most definitely going to have that talk now, and I promptly dropped my previous expression for one of concern.

He flopped onto his bed, and patted the space beside him in a gesture for me to follow suit. I did, slowly, and was genuinely surprised when he wrapped an arm around my waist, even though he avoided my gaze at this point.

"Mello?" I questioned, feeling a fair bit awkward at the moment, and not understanding. I had still thought he was going to get angry, but though he seemed a little bit distant, he wasn't.

He took a breath before he responded to me, "I'm not mad at you, anymore, just disappointed"

I raised my eyebrows at that, "Okay?"

He turned to look at me then, one of his legs pressing against mine, and then continued firmly. "I get you were freaked out that night, and probably confused, so you don't have to explain anything, I've already figured out what happened for the most part. So just tell me if there is anything else I should know, apologize, and that's all I need, okay?" His tone lifted a little at the end, and quite frankly, I was confused.

How is he fine with it? I went and did that with a guy, and all of the other things I did that night, isn't that what couples usually throw fits about? What they get into fights about? But maybe Mello just isn't the jealous type, its possible I guess...

"Um..okay" I said hesitantly, and as per his requests, recalled that night. There was only one thing that I didn't tell him about it already. "I had smoked that night too, and then thats everything from what I remember"

He nodded, "Apology now?" he then offered, and I smiled at him. He wasn't guilt tripping me with this, which was something that he would have done if he was even slightly upset. He was just almost lighthearted about it, and as I thought this, I felt so grateful to him.

"I'm very sorry, I won't ever do it again and I should have told you sooner" As soon as the words left my mouth he leaned in to kiss me, and I met him halfway, wrapping my arms around his neck as I did so. After a few seconds I pulled back a little, just enough to speak again.

"Mello, thank you so much" I whispered it, and at this close distance even, I could tell he was confused by my words.

"Why?" He asked me, unmistakably genuine confusion in his voice.

"Because your so nice to me even when I'm an idiot"

He chuckled at that, and kissed me again, whispering the next words under his breath. "you're not that bad, and I just want to make sure that you're always safe"

Light's Pov:

I woke up to a throbbing headache, sore stomach, scratchy throat, and a terrible taste in my mouth. It took me a few moments to remember why, but once I did I groaned loudly into my pillow. I didn't bother wondering why I was on a bed, probably mine, because I was one hundred percent sure that L brought me home last night. And a few seconds later I heard a door open anyways, along with L's voice after a short pause, confirming my certainty.

"Soichiro wants to talk to us later, and I need to talk to you too Light, so I suggest you take a shower and pretend that you don't have a hangover" His tone was sarcastic, and I let out another moan before slowly sitting up, and blinking blurrily at L as he stood by the doorway with a frown.

I rubbed my at my face, doing my best to ignore my pounding head and nodded sullenly. Seeing that I was indeed getting up, L turned away, but then he paused for a second and looked over his shoulder.

"And last night you were at a party with Misa and Takada, Takada got mad at you and threw punch at you, okay?"

I paused at that, trying to figure out what he was talking about, before I finally pieced it together and nodded again with the words; "Cover story" meanwhile I scolded myself for being so slow on the uptake.

L just turned his head back and continued out of the room, so I knew I was right, and then remembering that I had to be quick because of school, I got out of bed on unsteady legs and gathered some clothes from my dresser. I realized then that L had probably changed me when I got back, and the best way to describe the feeling in my stomach at that realization, was probably embarrassment.

My mind was cloudy as I made it to the bathroom, I knew, as I was incredibly hungover and still sleepy. So I wasn't really thinking about anything, like how guilty I am, how annoyed L will be, how I'm definitely in trouble, and how I probably owe everybody in the house now for covering for me. Those things did register somewhere in the back of my head, but I couldn't focus on them enough at that moment.

A cold shower, lots of mouthwash, a few Advil's and a fair bit of Beyond's makeup to cover up that puzzling bruise on my face later, I was more or less awake. Not perfectly, which annoyed me, but I could actually think now. I was going to question L about that bruise, it looked like I got punched by someone particularly well built, but I couldn't remember it at all.

Even so, slowly, last night started to come back to me and I continued to berate myself about it. That I let myself get that far gone, and let people see that much of myself like that. I remembered bits of me crying, Mello snapping at me, vomiting into a bucket, Matt looking incredulous. Lot's of things all in bits of pieces, though none of it really mattered right now.

I soon found L in our bedroom, folding what I did recognize to be last night's clothes into my dresser, and he looked up as I entered our room. But he didn't say anything and finished with what he was doing, while I sat down on my bed and watched him.

After a few moments he finished up, and finally stood up to walk over to me. I gave him a look, though I have no idea what the look was, I just knew he frowned at me when he saw it and proceeded to sit down beside me.

"What do you remember from last night?" He asked in a surprisingly gentle tone, though he was probably saving me from the pain that any noise would cause my still fading headache.

"Bits and pieces, not much" I supplied, and I felt that guilty feeling bubbling up in my stomach again. I didn't like that feeling in the slightest, and I never have.

He nodded "Okay, well I would punch you for being an idiot, but Mello already did that"

My eyes widened as he said that, and I questioned it right away, despite knowing it was definitely true. "Mello did this?" It came out disbelievingly as I pointed to my covered black eye and bruised cheek, and that earned a smirk from L.

"You don't remember it? I thought it would be the highlight of your night" He voiced teasingly, before he dropped his tone and continued "But, aside from Mello packing quite the punch, I'll have you know that your in quite a bit of trouble Light, and of course its mainly from me"

I raised an eyebrow at him, I knew that I was in trouble from Soichiro because of 'going to a party without permission', but aside from disappointing L and annoying everybody..oh. I guess I wasn't thinking as clearly as I thought I was, most likely from the Advils.

"You probably know that I'm quite irked by you right now, Light, but you also caused quite the hassle for everybody else too. And though they won't expect to much from you besides an apology, I expect a lot more from you, do you understand?"

That I now have no rights? And if I ever make a mistake again I'm not going to be protected? yes, I understand more than enough. I shuffled in my seat and looked at my lap. "I know, I'm sorry about all of this..." I really am.

He inhaled deeply, and brought a hand up to my neck, threading his fingers through my hair as he lightly turned my head towards him. "Your going to have to get used to this Light, I'm here for you, but as last night portrayed, thats not always going to be enough. Do you know what I mean right now, too?"

I looked at him in the eyes, but averted my gaze by a few centimeters after less than five seconds. L was making me feel like a child, that is for certain. "I do, you don't have to say it"

He smiled at me then, his voice lifting a fair bit as he spoke next. "Good, now I believe a stairway needs extra scrubbing, a Mr. BB's gag reflex needs an apology, and a certain Chief needs explaining to, up for it?" There was a glint in his eye, and I couldn't help but let out a strangled laugh as I buried my face in my hands, and mumbled a few words about how this isn't a joke. But L only laughed at me and stood up with a humorous; "Sounds good, Let's go then"

Near's Pov:

For whatever reason Light apologized to me -As well as everyone else, which was definitely reasonable- in the morning. I assume he had forgotten a lot of last night after all, because I pretty well had nothing to do with any of it. Well, except for informing Soichiro that the Punch incident was indeed true, as per Beyond's request.

I had the pleasure of observing Light apologize to Mello actually, which I quite enjoyed. The boisterous blond put everything he had into patronizing Light during it, and I found it rather amusing, Beyond did too of course -he was laughing practically the entire time.

And after the school day, from what I could tell, everyone had sorted out their issue's, which was a relief to me. Everybody's nonsense, though it didn't really include me much at all, was exactly that, nonsense. I liked sensible peace and quiet, so I was quite happy by the time I got home after classes to see that everybody was getting along. Until Beyond came up to me later while I was doing homework, with the other four teens in tow, and greeted me cheerily with a "Hey Near, how's your homework going?"

I looked up at him and the others suspiciously from my place on the livingroom floor, as I responded. "The usual, I don't have much and I'm just going over it again"

He chuckled, smirking slightly. "Good, then you have no excuse not to come with us to the theater on a date"

I narrowed my eyes at them, "Really?"

"Yep, c'mon, it'll be fun" He was grinning at me now, and I felt uncomfortable under the pressure of all five of them, My stomach churning with an oddly drawing feeling as I focused on Beyond.

"I don't want to" I told them after a few seconds, and returned to my page, but not a second after that, was the book removed from under my nose and placed on the coffee table beside me. I looked back up at Beyond as he smiled at me, and was about to protest again to their 'date'. But before I could do anything, Beyond grabbed both of my arms and pulled me into a standing position, I couldn't really resist, being so small I would only end up getting dragged, so I complied and gladly kept my balance.

He still had his one hand on my left arm while I stood, and he was just smiling happily now while the others waited a few feet away. "Come on Near, you hardly ever go out, so just this once okay?"

I shook my head, giving him a halfhearted glare, I at least sort of knew who had already won here. I had no reason to stay home, except for; 'I just don't want to'.

"Please?" he begged, pulling on my arm a little, and I just sighed after a moment.

"Alright, I'll come" I told him, but made sure to keep a frown on my face so that he got the message as I stepped forwards. He let go of my arm with a full blown grin this time, and patted me on the back, seemingly ignoring my frown.

"Awesome, and don't worry, I'll make sure you have fun" He said cheekily, before leading me into the boot room with the rest of them, his hand resting on my shoulder. That feeling was almost distracting, how his hand was just resting there, but I ignored it in favor of finding my shoes and slipping them on.


End file.
